Depression: How To Deal

[Kuya_Empoy]

i do have health anxiety, hypochondriac ata yun... i used to take meds... jovia and downers pero i stopped na. currently i am trying to fight my way against the cycle of health anxiety. getting my body fit and lessening the possible risk of having a heart attack -- the sickness that i am scared of...

 

any advise mga sirs/maams

[josepo]

meditation.. sometimes i go to our local beaches and listen to the waves when i feel down it helps.. pede din iyoutube siguro ocean waves hehe

[studentnurse33]

we are all blessed because we are all alive, have a support person whom you can share your problems, secrets, achievements and everything for you to vent out that feelings

[paddy]

Most impt of all is being aware one has a depressive state... I do my fave things like watching movies when i am in that state once in a while...

[KICX]

A lot of great advices here, thanks!

[Edmund Dantes]

Hi guys,

 

Just wanted to share. I have been battling clinical depression for a little over 7 months now. I am proud to say that these days I have been gaining the upperhand in the fight, but it wasn't always like that. The first few months was really hell for me. It was like someone threw me inside a well, and I am constantly drowning. I look up and see the light at the end of the well, but I just can't climb towards it. Thats how I would describe it. Getting through every minute of the day was a huge struggle because you feel constantly depleted. You can't even think and focus on some basic routines because you are all messed up inside. The hardest part of the day was in the morning, because you know its just going to be another painful day you have to survive. The second hardest part of the day was at night. I had to deal with this depression away from home, away from friends and family. So at night I really had no one else to talk to. Neither could I talk to my colleagues about it. So I would pray for 2 things. For the sun to not come up, and for me to not wake up. Because during weekends, I would just force my body to sleep even though it didn't want to anymore. I was just begging for any escape from the pain I could be given even for just 10 minutes.

 

Then things got worse. I really hit an all time low. So I started relying on alcohol a lot to numb the pain at night. I became so dependent on it, that the first thing I wanted to do in the morning was fast forward the day so I can be reunited with my bottle. But then your body grows tolerance for alcohol so I kept drinking some more. It got to the point where Id drink at night till I pass out, then when Id wake up a bit early morning, I would drink again because I was holding on to the numb feeling that alcohol gave me. I really didn't suffer from hangovers or anything because of my choice for drink. BUT I was experiencing other forms of chronic pain. Aside from the chest pain, I had abdominal pains, my taste palates were all messed up, and I felt exhausted all the time.

 

Until finally, I took the courage to use my medical benefits to have myself checked, and was recommended to a depression specialist. Based on my psych evaluation, the doctor didn't want me to rely too much of sleeping medication, given my tendency at the time to just abuse it. See, depression is like any physical disease. It should be given proper diagnosis and it really helps to get a professional examination. Even then, it really didn't stop my self-destructive behavior. It got to the point where I got really so scared of what I was doing to myself because it would only be a matter of time till I killed myself with all that poison I am consuming. One thing that really helped me and turned things around was when I started reconnecting with my family and true friends. It was really cathartic to find out kung sino yung totoong nagmamahal sayo at sino yung nasasaktan bukod sayo dahil sa pinagdaanan mo. But still I was behaving like a rabbid dog back then, rejecting help I was being given. But I got exhausted eventually.

 

So I took my therapy more seriously, and my doctor recommended the following steps towards my recovery. 1. Grief- its ok to grief. Cry if I had to, I had to just let it all out. When the tears start running dry, talagang dun maguumpisa mabuo yung tapang mo. 2. Reflection- Look back at everything, see what mistakes you made, learn to separate what is your fault from what is not. Take all the lessons you can get. 3. Letting go- To recover from the past you have to learn to let go of everything, both good and bad. I realized that the reason I was not moving forward because I refused to let go of all the good things from the past, when I should be more focused on creating better memories with the lessons I learned. 4. Self-love and appreciation- This really helped turn things around. I used to really loathe myself, but when I began to finally see my own value and worth I slowly relented on destroying myself. More importantly I finally decided to forgive myself 5. Rebuild- I am at this stage right now, rebuilding a new me. Breaking the routine, kicking out the bad habits and replacing them with good ones. I am trying to develop a sharper mind and a stronger body.

 

These days have been much better for me. I mean, all that sorrow and anxiety is still right there at the corner waiting to get the better of me. But I feel like finally I am getting the correct treatment for this disease that I have. So I battle that everyday. The temptation to just go backwards and start feeling sorry for myself again. With the help of positive distraction and plenty of physical and mental exercise I have been gaining the upper hand of the battle so far. I will say that I am fully recovered when I can once again start trusting my heart, because right now I listen more to my mind. It will come at the right time, and Id like to think I am getting there. Just by staying clean for quite sometime now. It brings me back so much of that lost pride. Moreover, I am so proud for learning the art of emotional independence. All of us need to have this at a certain level. Sure you need people in your life to add happiness, but ultimately your happiness and well-being is your responsibility.

 

So if I can give advice to those going through the same process, I will say that really force your power of will to get past your depression. Yes time does wonders, but you gotta make active efforts to to use the time to your advantage, and not be passive in a way that time uses you. Get out of your bed, go get some fresh air, socialize, exercise, do anything or something even if you don't feel like doing it. Parang pag may sakit ka at wala kang gana kumain, pilitin mo talaga para lumakas ka. I know that sometimes it feels like you got no more will to live on and keep going. But if you take this small baby steps you will find out na masarap pa din mabuhay kahit minsan nasasaktan. Most of all, really learn to love yourself. The better you treat yourself, the sooner you will start feeling much better and find a new worth to yourself. Don't give up. Use whatever painful experience you had and turn it into something positive. Sabi nga di ba? The pain you feel today can be the strength and wisdom you will have tomorrow. So hang in there. If hanging in there for a day is impossible, try hanging on for 5 minutes at a time, then another 5, then another 5, keep repeating till those minutes march into hours and days.

 

Sorry medyo napahaba. Pero sana kapulutan ito ng insight at sana makatulong.

 

Thanks.

Edited May 28, 2014 by Edmund Dantes

[Edmund Dantes]

Guys let me share below is the rating depressed test of my wife which is major depression is high, im helpless i dont know where could i start to help her, this was trigger after she gave birth to our 1st baby almost two years ago, sometimes she reminiscing the past its looks like she has a regret of marrying me, sa totoo lang im not a rich man but she came from prominent family having a chinese blood, maybe nabigla sya when i propose to marry her after nun nalaman nya na di ako yung tipo mayaman na guy for her na even yung mga bagay na gusto nya gawin like travel or xplore di namin magawa kasi ako mismo kulang sa financial stability, not all professional like me na may jobd na I.T works eh mayaman or malaki sahod, i cant blame her because its my fault talaga, if i finished my bachelor lang sana baka mas maganda work ko at salary cap ko...but still im very lucky kasi husband pa din ang tingin nya sakin..still fighting for everyday life..work work but not financial freedom..hindi man nya sabihin sakin nararamdaman nya but nararamdaman ko at nakikita ko and still she's still taking care our daugther very well but not me totally even our sexual drive nawala na..and the end of the day we are still husband and wife...the good for me im positive thinker wala sa vocabulary loss hope but in times of this struggle in our life nagpapanic ako.

 

Disorder Your Score

 

Major Depression: High

Dysthymia: High-Moderate

Bipolar Disorder: Slight-Moderate

Cyclothymia: Slight

Seasonal Affective Disorder: High

Postpartum Depression: N/A

 

Ok first of all, may I ask if you have seen a physician to confirm these test scores? I know marami sa internet self-tests for depression, but its difficult to give proper diagnosis on how serious your wife's depression is, until you sit and consult with a physician. In my case, I had a brain scan at it showed grey matter eroding from my amygdala which is the center of pleasant moods or something like that.

 

And can you tell us what are her symptoms na din? Ang depression kasi, hindi lang yan basta basta lungkot lang. May mas mabigat na symptoms yan. Like insomnia or hypersomnia. Loss of apeptite sa pagkain, feeling exhausted all the time, difficulty in executing daily routines even the most basic ones. Pwede ring may kasama syang anxiety. If your wife shows symptoms like this, then I really suggest you consult a physician. Kahit general practicioner muna until you can be referred to a specialist. Pwede kasi muna sya bigyan ng vitamin supplement para di masyado manghina pangangatawan at supplements para ganahan kumain. Pag clinical yung depression, hindi yan basta basta nalulunasan ng small pep talks. So it helps to be diagnosed as an expert.

 

Sa kwento mo kasi, it seems na may problema kayo sa mismong marriage nyo. She may be going through a phase of disappointment, pero pwedeng hindi naman sya talaga depressed. My advice, subukan nyo magusap magasawa siguro ng ma-sort out nyo ito ng maigi. Kung talagang mahal ka ng asawa mo, kahit pa hindi ka mayaman she will stick with you, and if she wants you to be more successful financially, she will give you a more positive push towards it. Hindi naman siguro mukhang pera misis mo. She may just want a little bit of financial security lalo nga at may anak pa kayo. Plus of course all women want to be taken to nice places and enjoy tangible things. So sana, as partners for life you can figure out a way how to turn this negative phase into something more positive

 

Goodluck

[Angas ng Tondo]

Drink, Relax, Unwind...

[John Galt]

spend time with friends, go to church

[Edmund Dantes]

Exercise exercise excercise.

 

It really does work. Having suffered depression myself, being in the gym saved my life a lot. It is not really about developing the torso of an underwear model, its about training your mind to endure and focus. Its about forging your character with an iron.

 

Yes its so much worth the membership fees, you are getting something more than a stronger and healthier body. Exercise releases plenty of hormones that improve your mood.

[Pillows]

nuod ng just for laughs

[cindy cato]

shopping

[gobster11]

Chocolates. Nothing beats depression like chocolates.

[Liz]

Time.

[amatss]

See a psychiatrist.