The Mail Box

[Chito]

KB,

 

I would love to gloat and say "I told you so".

 

But still I care for you too much to derive any satisfaction from it.

[wjc-934]

bakit nga ba minahal kita????

 

matalik naman tayong magkaibigan...

 

diko inakalang mamahalin kita ng ganito

[bods1000]

Y

 

how things turn around the moment I hear your voice.

It's been only a week, but as it is for us, 7 days seem epochal.

I blundered around for what seemed eternity.

But that eternity is now history - for we have now been in touch.

How I wished my tongue could have snaked its way through the line and licked whatever it was I have been missing.

Our lips always seem to be so close whenever we talk on the line,

our hearts closer, but our minds adrift to that moment

when we really could be together.

Love you sweetie; you seem so near again.......

 

N

[drEVILmba]

Nako magiingat ka A...... Pag di ko talaga mapigilan eh papatulan na kita

 

 

Kung di lang pangit tingnan, baka lang kasi pagisipan na sinulut kita.... kaso puros paramdam ka eh

[Zerreit]

I posted this in my room. Another one of my undelivered letters written and placed inside a box hidden somewhere in my room.

 

Mein Liebstes,

 

Ich habe mich nach ihnen für so lang gesehnt. Wann kommen sie nach hause? Dieser monat scheint bis jetzt weg. Ich kann kaum warten. Ich bin auf dem rand hier. Ich bin besorgt gewesen, vorsichtig, glücklich, ekstatisch, alle gleichzeitig. Was haben sie mich angetan? Ich bin vollständig aus meinem verstand heraus! Jedesmal wenn das wir sprechen, I lang für sie sogar mehr. Jedesmal schicken sie mir anzeigen, ich fühle wie meine gefühle bin zu bersten. Ich möchte ihnen erklären, sie bitten, nach hause zu kommen. Aber wer sind ich, zum zu fragen sie? Sie sind nicht grube. Ich bin nicht ihr. Wir sind aber freunde. Möglicherweise sollte eins von uns unternehmen den ersten schritt in das zulassen, wie wir wirklich in richtung zu einander fühlen. Möglicherweise, wenn die rechte zeit kommt. Möglicherweise nicht.

 

Ihr immer,

Zerreit

[Wyld]

c...

 

i said to myself so many times in the months that i could not reach out to you.. that i will never let you have that power over me again. that henceforth, whatever happens, whether you come back or not... id be my own person.

 

and i knew for a bit, i was successful.

 

but a thirty minute talk, several messages, and im yours again.

 

i want me back! but... you have claimed me again... and i am once again, powerless.

 

-k

[DELISYUS]

i could have fallen in love with you last night...

 

anyway, thank you for a wonderful experience

[irshes]

B,

 

You are crazy, you know that? That's why I've loved you all these years

Two more weeks.

 

T.

[Zerreit]

You never cease to surprise me.

 

Your phone call woke me up earlier today. It was totally unexpected. I'd normally get pissed when a phone call wakes me up. But I was so speechless and grinning from ear to ear when I heard your voice, I nearly fell off my bed. That deep voice I've been wanting to hear for a very long time now. Sorry if I blabbed and stuttered, I was just really surprised.

 

Thank you for the phone call. Thank you for checking up on me. Thank you for thinking of me. Thank you for making my day. Thank you for placing a big smile on my face today. Thank you for such a wonderful and sweet surprise.

 

You never fail to make me smile.

 

L

Edited May 19, 2004 by Zerreit

[Mayella]

dear B,

 

the time i spent with you was exquisitely bliss, even if it was only a fraction of your time... time with you is so precious, that i cherish every moment of it, wishing that it would never end... once again, we are jolted back into reality and dream again of our next meeting... until then, my dearest... i will miss you terribly...

 

L

Edited May 21, 2004 by mayella76

[Wyld]

we argued.

again.

 

why is this so difficult now?

where is the effortless ease with which we began?

 

i hate this.

[ziggyzag]

D,

 

u said u'll be gone for only three months..

 

didn't i remind u that i'm just a text, a phone call, and an e-mail away..

its been three months since..

we said our commitments..

 

it's been two months since..

u left..

 

and i haven't heard a word from you..

and my emails are bouncing off your inbox..

should i still wait..

only you can tell me..

 

S

[wjc-934]

dikita kasi ma reach nuon...

 

ang taas taas mo....

 

ikaw ang pinakamatalino sa section natin.....

 

samantalang ako..... wala lang...

 

dimo nga ako pansin nuon eh...

 

un pala ay magiging matalik tayong magkaibigan....

 

hanggang sa ngayon naman ay ganun parin...

 

pero sana ay humigit pa sa pagiging matalik na magkaibigan ang mapuntahan natin...

 

mag hihintay ako hanggang sa huli.... hanggat kaya ko...

 

hanggat may hininga ako.....

 

 

HANGGAT INIIBIG KITA.......

[bods1000]

Y

 

my mind travels with webbed feet through murky imaginings;

but gone are the days when your absence strangles me;

my knowledge is secure;

our love resides in a fortress.

miss you, sweetie.......

 

N

[Wyld]

ah well. another week has almost passed. i dont think were anywhere near to resolving the things we said we would resolve this week.

 

more and more i know the answer to our dilemma is me movin to where you are... but ... can we do that without maiming each other?

 

i dont know. i wish i knew.

[Magaling]

Everytime I see your little red car parked by the driveway, I would get tempted to invite you for coffee. Have a ltitle chat. Find out how you're doing. Ask you if there's anything I could help you with. Can I be part of your life?

 

I want to tell you how I hate to see you raise your kid all by yourself. How maybe I could be a father-figure to your daughter. Read her stories before it's time for bed. Pick her up from school when you're stuck in the office with no one to take care of her.

 

I want to listen to what your plans in life would be. Maybe you'd be interested to know how I planned my career and perhaps even pick up a few pointers? I want to share my experiences with you. Maybe you'd even be impressed to know how I picked my life up from the gutter to where I am today.

 

Sometimes, I'd be stuck in my hotel in a far away place and I'd wonder how it would be like to have you with me. I'd look out of my window silently calling your name knowing fully well that there's no way you could hear me. And it's not just the distance. I've travelled far and wide and yet the greatest distance there could ever be is from where I am to where your heart is. Even if in the geometric place, we could be just a few feet apart.

 

For you have largely ignored me. I guess you're still at a point in your life when life is not yet to be taken seriously and so the endless parties go on and on keeping you from settling down to more serious business. Not recognizing that maybe you need help and I could help you. Right now, I don't even count do I? In spite of what I have become, I am not the dashing knight you probably have in mind.

 

Too bad you've met me when I am only a shadow of what I once was. If you have met me then, it could be that you'd be proud to have me by your side. There once was a time when I could fly! Now, all I am is a member of the club of the walking wounded.

 

Or maybe it's the other way around. Once bitten and twice shy as the saying goes. Your failed marriage has caused you to treat men like me with suspicion? Perhaps trying to prove that you can make it on your own without help from any man? My dear, I wish that I could tell you that life is hard enough even when you have someone there to catch you when you fall. It could be even tougher when you're all alone. Yet I once reached out a helping hand to you and you wouldn't take it.

 

Besides, what can I possibly offer? Bottomline: you would be my mistress and that's the best-case scenario. Sometimes, it grieves me to think of you and how my case has only a snowball's chance in hell. Yet, if that's the case, then why did I even have to feel the way I do today? Am I not too old for this s**t? Why then can't I get rid of thoughts of you?

 

Geez, I wish life were less complicated. I guess you don't need someone like me in your life and you are right. Unfortunately, I'm still here stuck in the twilight zone. Still struggling to make sense of what hit me. The only thing going for me is that until now, I have managed to keep my feelings to myself knowing fully well that I'd be a fool to get it off my chest.

 

Tang ina! Isang beer pa nga!

[Magaling]

Magmula nang masilayan ko ang iyong kagandahan ay iniukit ko na ang iyong larawan sa aking puso. Matapos ang puso ko ay akin nang isinara sa iba pang pagsuyo at ang susing ginamit sa pag-kandado nito ay itinapon ko na sa pinakamalalim na bahagi ng dagat na pinaliligiran ng mga pating upang hindi na muling masisisid pa at mabuksan ang puso kong ito.

 

Upang patunayan lamang sa iyo na ang aking hangarin ay wagas at dalisay, tatawirin ko ang mga bundok at ilog makapiling ka lamang sa bawat sandali ng aking buhay. Makamtan lamang ang iyong sulyap ay pipitasin ko ang mga buwan at bituin upang ialay sa iyong paanan.

 

O aking sinta! Ang bigkas ng iyong pangalan ay huni ng ibon sa aking pandinig. Ang samyo ng iyong bango ay katulad ng hasmin na pumapawi sa anumang luha at pighati. Dulot mo ay ligayang walang hanggan. Liwanag na daig pa ang sikat ng araw sa tanghaling tapat!

 

Kasing tapat lamang ng aking pagsuyong walang bahid ng alinlangan at puno ng katapatan. Sa dulo man ng panahon, ito ay hindi kukupas at mananatiling matingkad gaya ng dugong dumadaloy sa aking puso at sumasariwa sa aking walang katapusang pagmamahal.

 

Nais kong iduyan ka sa aking bisig. Iluklok ang iyong ganda sa dambana ng pag-ibig. Nawa ay malasap ang tamis ng iyong halik. Sing tamis ng pulot sa mataas na pukyutang aking aakyatin. Ikaw ay hasmin sa hardin ng Eden na siya kong sasadyain. Perlas ng silangan, na aking sisisirin. Sa gabing malamig, hayaan mo sana giliw na ipadama sa iyo init nitong damdamin. Manapa ay gumising sa bukang liwayway na ang unang mababanaag ay kislap ng iyong mata at ang mukha ng langit.

[Mayella]

B,

 

darn it! just when i thought i would be fine, i get this sick twinge again... sigh! i'm sorry, i cannot help it... no matter how much i psyche myself up to just ignore it, i realize that my efforts are futile... don't worry, i guess i will be okay soon... i just don't know when though...

 

L

Edited May 21, 2004 by mayella76

[bods1000]

Y

 

God that was good!!!

It was so nice to hear from you again, to talk with you again,

To luxuriate again in that child-like lilt in your voice......

Oh, to be happy once more!

Talking with you brings out all the superlatives of the moment.

I love you, sweetie......

So nice.........

 

N

[Wyld]

C...

 

i am slipsliding away. i think.

i hope you feel that.

 

come and save me.

 

please.

 

-k

[Zerreit]

You confuse me so much. I don't think I need this kind of confusion right now. Why do you always come back when I've completely forgotten you?

[LostCommand]

Poolside writings

 

You look around and chat with your friendly taxi driver, trying to support his family in a shanty somewhere. You make small talk with the jeepney driver, all of whose kids are working at such tender ages. At the sales counter of SM, you flash a smile at the counter ladies, and they smile back so genuinely (and not because I look like some movie star)

 

You sense the inherent cheerfulness, hope, and faith of the everyday Filipino in their future. Our typical countrymen, at ths point, are not yet so corrupted that his soul is sold to the devil at birth. Our race still has that youthfulness in it, not the jaded, bahala na attitude of so many other countries I have visited.

 

Of course, there are lots of bad eggs.

 

But so long as the essential soul of the Filipino nation is intact, so long as the common people help each other out in their daily lives, so long as the passengers in a jeepney still pay their fare without the driver asking, then we have hope yet.

 

It becomes our responsibility, as leaders and as leaders to be, not to fail our contrymen. The precise means is not yet clear to me, but surely involves the following:

 

1. Preparing ourselves by education, exposure abroad, training, finding jobs that suit our skills if we can, or simply finding jobs that tran us, and going about our daily lives in respect of our poorer countrymen.

2. Accumulate and save money, if we can, for the rainy days, or to invest that money at some point.

3. Live within our means, frugally, so that we are always prepared for the worst are not tempted to break too many rules.

 

and

 

4. If Fate chances that we are in a position to do change, as we go up the levels of society, we must be always prepared to maximize on that (brief) chance, and also to use our conscience at that (brief) moment.

If the chance did not pass one by, then, he was spared a brutal task. Such a thing as luck...

 

This present time of agonizingly slow change is best used by training, developing, preparing, and growing ourselves. Then we just strain our eyes for the opportunity to make good. I think the Fates will give us that opportunity, for I think they agree with us when we say that the Filipino is still worth fighting for!

 

The dying, I reserve for the bad eggs. Personally.

 

-Felix Villaflor IV

[irshes]

M,

Hey. I'm just thinking about how much I'd miss you.

You said it makes you sad; well, I feel that way too. I guess we got so used to having each other around. I wanted to be with you, but I need this time off. I have to sort out things.

I keep that book with me always. Your face would grace the front pages. Damn, your scent and those beautiful hands I love so much to see and hold... I will crave for them all the more.

When I come back, I hope to see you in that black shirt.

Be good.

 

T.

[Guest gorgeous_23]

i just dont wanna eat, i wanna spend the rest of my break hugging and kissing you... i dont care if im hungry, starving, whatever, as long as im beside you... im full... i just love you the way u r and u r so unforgottable...

 

i love you.... i love you...

[Guest chunky]

GG,

 

I never expected to feel the way I do right now,

I never really thought I'd fall.

And though we're separated only a short distance,

I can't even give you a call.

 

We're separated not by walls,

not by seas, or oceans, or space.

We're so close, and yet so far,

We're so far out of place.

 

I long to touch you, to hold you.

Be with you right now.

But the circumstances won't allow it,

Be with you, I don't know how.

 

Tempted I am to sweep you,

take you from your suffering.

What I may do is right or wrong

But is it good to you I bring?

 

I love you, you already know that,

can't really be too obvious.

I can wait, I will wait,

Even if your mom's furious!

Edited May 23, 2004 by chunkyhunk