The Mail Box

[LoveSpell]

Sadness fills my soul as this Valentines day. For I have noone to spend this joyous day with. I will sit and watch girls get showered with love and affection. And as i sit all alone I will remember all the happy days we spent together, I will remember the gifts and memories we shared that great day. I love you but you just dont see how much you truly mean to me. So now I'm left all alone with just the memories of your love. I wonder if you think of me and all the fun we had. You are the only one for me and forever that will stay. Even after Valentine's passes and another one draws near I will never forget the magical days when we were always together.

Edited February 14, 2007 by LoveSpell

[chipmaker]

kung sino man ang mag-atubiling basahin ito...

 

Ang puno't dulo ng pag-ibig

 

Nakakatawa talaga ang love. Isa siyang napakalaking oxymoron. Lahat ng pwede mong masabi sa kanya, baliktarin mo at totoo pa rin. Ang labo diba? Pero ang linaw.

 

Masaya magmahal. Malungkot magmahal. Di mo naiintindihan pero naiintindihan mo. Walang rason. Maraming rason. Di mo na kaya, pero kaya mo pa rin. Masakit magmahal. Pero okey lang. Leche, ano ba talaga?!

 

May kaibigan ako, sabi niya dati "Love is only for stupid people." Nakakatawa kasi laude ang standing niya, pero dumating ang panahon, na-in-love din ang hunghang. At ayun, tanga na siya ngayon. Lahat kasi ng nahahawakan ng love nagiging oxymoron din. O kaya paminsan, nagiging moron lang.

 

Hindi lang kasi basta baliktaran ang pag-ibig. Lahat ng bagay nababaligtad din niya. Lahat ng malalakas na tao, humihina. Ang mayayabang, nagpapakumbaba. Ang mga walang pakialam, nagiging Mother Teresa.

 

Ang mga henyo, nauubusan ng sagot. Ang malulungkot, sumasaya. Ang matitigas, lumalambot. (At tumitigas din ang mga bagay na madalas nama'y malambot.)

 

Nakakatawa talaga. Lalo na kapag dumadating siya sa mga taong ayaw na talaga magmahal. Napansin ko nga eh. Parang kung gusto mo lang ma-in-love ulit, sabihin mo lang ang magic words na "Ayoko na ma-inlove!" biglang WACHA! Ayan na siya. Nang-aasar. Magpapaasar ka naman.

 

Di ba nakakatawa rin na pagdating sa problema ng ibang tao, ang galing galing mo? Pero 'pag problema mo na yung pinag-uusapan parang nawawalan ng saysay lahat ng ipinayo mo dun sa namomroblemang tao? Naiisip mong wala namang mali dun sa mga sinabi mo. Pero bakit parang wala ring tama?

 

Bali-baliktad din ang nasasabi ng mga taong tinamaan ng madugong pana ng pag-ibig. "Ngayon ko lang nalaman ganito pala. Sabi ko na eh!" "Ang sarap mabuhay. Pwede na 'ko mamatay. Now na!"

 

At hindi lang 'yon. Ang sarap din pagtawanan ng mga taong alam naman nilang masasaktan lang sila eh magpapatihulog pa rin sa bangin ng pag-ibig. Tapos 'pag luray-luray na yung puso nila, siyempre hindi sila yung may kasalanan. Siya! "Bakit niya 'ko sinaktan?" May kasama pang pagsuntok sa pader yon, at pagbabagsak ng pinto. Hayop talaga.

 

Mauubos ang buong magdamag ko kakasabi ng mga bagay na nakakatawa 'pag pag-ibig na ang pinag-usapan. Ang daming beses ko na kasi siya nakasalubong kaya masasabi ko nang eksperto na 'ko. Pero wala pa rin akong alam.

 

Pero ang pinakanakakatawa sa lahat ay ang katotohanang kapag gusto magpatawa ng pag-ibig, ipusta na mo na lahat ng ari-arian mo dahil siguradong ikaw ang punchline.

 

Nakakatawa no?

 

Nakakaiyak.

[chiquezee]

In 1876, they said that the telephone has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication.

 

In 1974, Margaret Thatcher expressed that it will be years, and not in her life time, before a woman becomes the Prime Minister.

 

In 1977, Ken Olson can't see any reason why anyone would want a computer in their home.

 

Things evolve. As do people. Or else you're dead. Theory of Dynamism.

 

Learn from mistakes. You can't change the past, but you can ruin the present by insisting on the failures of the past you should leave (have left) behind.

 

You get my point?

 

 

- C.

Edited February 14, 2007 by chiquezee

[KristinLavransdatr]

a poem for the rank and file

(by me)

 

i envy you at times like now

as you work with head on your pc low,

when you scratch your head as your errors show

before your bosses' smoking nose.

 

i envy you at hours like this

as you busy self towards the break

when you heave a sigh from narrow depths

thanking god it is close to twelve.

 

i envy you at nine o' clock

when you punch in there at the bundy clock

and then at five when you queue to log

this time be out for tomorrow's rut.

 

i envy you your time ain't yours

there's always one to check your course

what work you've done, and how they're done

what work didn't work, what work be shunned.

 

i envy you as i burn the hours

since yesterday my schedules hum

so silently slow and my brains go numb

after weeks of breathless bloody jam.

 

i envy you to envy me

but i envy you less if you insult she

who speaks her mind this way and thus,

because you can't, although you try.

[willow_boy]

SV,

 

Thanks but I can't be there. No s@%t.

 

But, you can still count on me to give you a call one of these days. Don't ask why but I will.

 

Me

Edited February 19, 2007 by willow_boy

[iwalkalone]

ang galing mo Lo! :cool:

 

 

Dear boyfriend ( sabi ko! walang kokontra)

 

One step forward, two steps back...wala na bang ibang dance step?...baka mamaya sumobra ang steps back...mahulog na tayo sa stage.

 

 

To Kuleet,

Tama na utang na loob...wag mo na sayangin mga luha at dialog mo sa kin....walang wala na talaga bat ba di ka makapaniwala...ang hirap isipin no?....siguro ang natatandaan mo kase eh nung mahal pa kita ( ngayon nga di narin ako sure kung minahal nga ba talaga kita eh ) Malupit ako? ... patawad...di ko sadya...pero ganito talaga ako sa lahat ng tao...pwera lang sa minamahal ko ...nagkataon lang...hindi na talaga kita mahal ( kung minahal man kita talaga ). Wala akong awa?...oo...sorry...sa pagmamahal isa lang ang alam ko...ang magmahal...bukod dun wala nang iba pa....kapag wala na yun...talagang wala na...hindi ako pwedeng ma confuse sa nararamdaman ko...black and white lang kase sa kin ang lahat. Sayang....sayang talaga ako...alam ko...pero sana wag mo nang ulit ulitin..wag ka na ring umiyak ng umiyak...tama na rin ang pagmamakaawa...masyado mo nang binababa ang sarili mo....and i just couldn't give a damn. Oo tama ka...para sa kin kase Love is a Fairy tale...kahit gaano mo kamahal ang isang tao...kung hindi naman kayo parehas ng nararamdaman...walang kabuluhan ang pag ibig na yon....dapat lang na ibaling mo sa iba...kase ibig sabihin lang nun...kung ikaw man si Romeo...sorry...hindi ako ang Juliet mo. Move on....find peace.

- maya

[chiquezee]

From Soul

to Soul:

 

 

One thing you have to keep in mind: the tides change every two weeks. You are too smart to drown.

[iwalkalone]

To My Chemical Romance,

Sana naman magbati na tayo....miss ko na yung dati nating samahan eh....nalulungkot talaga ako sa "transition" mo....parang..."we are so last year".....hay....sayang di mo ba nakikita...the person you've grown into...is somehow...so like me?...andami sana nating common interests....parehas tayong Emo...like "This is who we are"...yun nga lang ...you're on the punk side ( uh sana tantanan mo narin pag lagay ng eye liner...sa totoo lang nag mumuka kang adik... )...pero relate parin tayo...kung sana lang....di tayo naging "Sandpaper and Silk" ...(syempre ako yung Silk ). Alam ko "Saying sorry" is something we both need to hear from each other....pero alam ko rin na di natin parehas gagawin yun....pero ayus lang as long as mabalik lang natin yung dati...."If only you were lonely"....like me...."The silence in black and white" between us is just too intense...it gets unbearable at times..."Apparently" .... this is like me..."Screenwriting an apology"... gusto ko na lang matapos lahat ito at bumalik sa dati ang relationship natin...it hurts like "pens and needles"...

Wag mo naman kase sana ako hanapan ng perfection...remember there are "Angels with even filthier souls"....and please bear in mind always..."I am on your side". :heart:

From Hawthorne Heights

[missmanners]

kasi hindi ko makuhang makalimutan ka ng tuluyan, tatanungin na lang kita kung ok ka ba? kung nakakakain ka ba? kung mabigat ba ngayon ang trabaho mo?

 

kasi hindi ko makuhang makalimutan ka ng tuluyan. ginawa ko na lahat siguro... pero walang mapirmeng solusyon sa problemang ayaw mawala. para kang pimpol na malalim ang ugat. di mo man makita pa ang ulo, pag nahahawakhawakan mo, alam mong nandun pa siya.

 

di kita makalimutan. kahit na kailangan. at ayaw ko nang labanan. kung ayaw talaga ng puso't isipan na mawala ka, eh di wag.

[LostCommand]

Pare,

 

My idealism died out 32 years ago. If I do what you ask, it is because tis a matter of honour.

 

I do not agree to your simple solutions. You will need to deal with me differently.

 

I have options, and do not always have to deal with you. If you want to use me, and my kind, find my levers.

 

No amateurs please, send in the professionals

 

LC

[bluegreen717]

Happy Anniversary. This song seems like the perfect fit.

 

I REMEMBER THE BOY

 

Today I heard them play the song again

An old familiar strain from way back when

 

Every note and every line

It's always been a favorite song of mine

 

It used to haunt me so some years ago

Reminds of a boy I used to know

And although the melody lives on

The memories and the boy are all but gone

 

chorus.

(And/So) while the song still brings that certain glow

And the words still sing of love I know

It isn't quite the way it was before

I remember the boy

But I don't remember the feeling anymore

 

The promises we made seemed easier then

But seasons change

And time erases the tears

As quickly as the ripples disappear

Edited February 19, 2007 by bluegreen717

[bluegreen717]

Exactly seven years ago. In that chapel by the cemetery. Old folks said the venue will bring bad luck; I say, luck had nothing to do with how we turned out, nor with how I wised up, albeit late.

 

I was radiant and at my most beautiful in that white gown, an angel inside me. Remember the pains we took getting that dress out of the shop? The few short months we labored for that event? And it was just us. We had no other family member whose help we would have enlisted.

 

Why I turned a blind eye to your faults, I do not know. Old folks said that's what a good wife does. My mistake. A good wife does not a good husband make.

[missmanners]

it's not the season for that yet, honey. you have to be patient and bide your time. there's lots to do while you wait. relationships, like plants, that need watering. projects that need finishing. beginnings that need endings. keep your hands busy, dear. your time, full. and before you know it, the seasons will change. leaves will turn colors and fall. greens will become browns. and from there, new life will spring up. you won't know when this will happen. neither will i. but when it does, there will be no fanfare. just a quiet assurance that this is the time to reap what you've been sowing. and the fruits of your labor will be wonderful and more than you expected.

 

so breathe deep, honey. do your work. eat, sleep. take care of yourself. your time will come.

[chiquezee]

It had been a couple of perfect days.

 

Breakfast in bed...

Sushi for lunch with excellent white wine

Under the soft and warm golden rays

Amidst shadows passing by, which I did not even notice

Palms up, outstretched arms,

privileged enough to receive from your overflowing well of reason.

Flattered that you even listened to some of mine.

 

Fingers intertwined...

Walking side by side...

The scent of red, and the scent of blue

Beautiful image of two

Fate smiling, as if knowing

 

Dinner of the finest lamb chops

Exotic Arabian smell notwithstanding

As long as one was there with the other...

 

And then a nightcap

Overlooking the majestic view

Discussing inches of errors and

What can be so right

 

Ending the day the way it was started

Flesh on flesh

Skin to skin

 

Heart

Soul

Unmasked.

 

 

And so a mark of distinction is stamped

on that day

and days.

 

Perfect.

 

 

 

Sincerely,

me

[chiquezee]

I continue with my conquests, save for that which can't be conquered. I will not lay claim to what is not mine, or that which refuses to be mine, by choice or by fate, though I may desire as much as having one belong to me. I go on about my day, not searching, knowing it is I that shall be found.

 

- C

[CodenameV]

You were right about the effect of going away. However, the least you can do is to send a message. Oh well, hope you are ok.

[bluegreen717]

Sis,

 

I'm very sorry for your loss.

 

No, actually I'm happy he's dead. That man was a monster. I always wondered what it was you saw in him.

 

Finding out he f#&ked your so-called beauty queen best friend was terrible, wasn't it? I had serious misgivings about that chick, too.

 

Stop whining and crying, now. The only love that you'll ever need is right there beside you. Both sides of you, in fact.

 

L

[chiquezee]

For you.

 

It felt like springtime on this February morning

In the courtyard birds were singing your praise

I'm still recalling things you said to make me feel alright

I carried them with me today, Now

 

As I lay me down to sleep

This I pray

That you will hold me dear

Though I'm far away

I'll whisper your name into the sky

And I will wake up happy

 

I wonder why I feel so high

Though I am not above the sorrow

Heavy hearted

Till you call my name

And it sounds like church bells

Or the whistle of a train

On a summer evening

I'll run to meet you

Barefoot barely breathing

 

 

It's not too near for me

Like a flower I need the rain

Though it's not clear to me

Every season has its change

And I will see you

When the sun comes out again

 

 

- sophie b. hawkins

[chiquezee]

It is surprising how small the world is apparently becoming. Yes, I have met your father during one of my sorties far down south. Admirable man. I haven't seen idealism and practicality so intricately woven in a man of his age. To know first hand that it does actually work is inspiring, to say the least. I still have the magazine he "autographed" for me... Do send him my regards.

 

I met your brother as well. I was told he was being groomed to take over, but he immediately downplayed the talks and said he was more intent in pursuing his career as an M.D. That he has a sister and another brother who is more suited for the office. He must have been referring to you.

 

The beach your family owns is beautiful. We had a "feast" of inihaw under the pale moon, waves crashing against rocks, high-level talks half-shouted against the howling wind that is rarely seen in that part of the archipelago, unless you are beside the pristine sea. (The variety of fish harvested by your men were immaculately fresh. I believe the market for that outside your territory is big.) Even the two dozen armed security did not ruin the beauty of the night. It was too bad you were not there. It will be some time before I return to the northern part of the deep south. My schedule has been filled to the brim with OOCTs than IOCTs. If ever it is within the islands, it will be northward, to the mountains. But I am looking forward to meeting the heir to the dynasty...

 

Yes, I know of the fighting in Siocon which lasted for nine days, including two days of mopping up operation. It is amazing that about 95 percent of the officers and men of the battalion had no experience in combat. They have to be commended. When the marching orders were given, no one hesitated. The battalion showed they were ready for war. How many can actually claim that in this life that we live?

 

I was told by one soldier that the heavy volume of fire that met them made them freeze cold in their tracks. Baptism of fire for them, literally. But when even just 10 percent of the troop opened fire, that was enough to trigger others to join the fray. One Captain who had his first combat against the Huks in Central Luzon said that when you have the heart to fight, others would instinctively follow. Like a triggering mechanism, perhaps.

 

Firing at the enemy takes more than guts. You must know that, I am certain.

 

I agree with most of what you have written, from combat to combat. On one hand, we have seen enough blood and gore. I have not let go of my idealism, unfortunately, but it continues to serve its purpose and I have been fortunate enough to do some killings without too much blood. The ninja way. Slip the blade right through, pull out, and not a drop of blood. Clean swipe.

 

Perhaps one day we shall meet. Perhaps with the season at its peak, the opportunities are endless. Perhaps. But officers on the field, always. I can never remove my armor, my shield will always be up. Always.

 

 

-C

[missmanners]

i had a dream about you last night.

 

you were leaning against a car, looking like you'd all been waiting for me to arrive. i saw you from across the street... you in your shoes, your unmistakable hair...

 

i woke up before i could find out what happened next. i woke up with more questions than answers.

 

then again, there's no need to ask those questions anymore. it's never done me any good to ask. and sometimes the answers just came without the questions... even if they came violently, like in the form of unsolicited letters from people i was afraid existed, doing more damage than anything else.

 

i'm going to bide my time and see what happens next. in and out of my dreams.

Edited February 22, 2007 by missmanners

[bioniczeenger]

my parents have been very good to you even though you are a shitty daughter in law.. an awful wife.. and a very bad mother. how can u act as though u were wronged... before you look at how my dad reacted .. first think of what you have been doing... im really sorry to say that i despise having u as a sister in law... my family did everything to accept u for who u are but u were the one who's being difficult.. and yet after all of this i really dont understand why my family still pray for u.. i really dont get how the still hope for u... and all i can do is support them. be thankful that u are married to a good man..

[chiquezee]

Ok, I admit. It was stupidity on my part to have let down guard. Now I know. You must be laughing at me every single day I fell for that. Can I go now?

[chiquezee]

I hate it when you call.

 

There is a 9-hour difference between us and 4am chill notwithstanding, you wake me up. What for? You know I always end up biting my tongue, holding back myself from spewing acid, but failing every second that you stay on the other line. Why do you even bother calling to ask how I am? Sometimes I think it is exactly because you know I will bite that you make it a point to hear every sh*t that I say. Perhaps that makes you feel you are paying for all the sins.

 

You may not be aware but you leave me vulnerable to bitter memories of betrayal and distrust after every conversation. Only you can leave me raw that way. And f*ck, you still get away with it.

 

I know it has not escaped you that after all the years of complete dedication, faithfulness, and loyalty to you, I now feel I am incapable of trusting another man. Damn you. I can't even go on a week of feeling happy. You have to ruin it for me by bringing back reasons why I have been hammering my head with three things all these time - protect, preserve, survive.

 

You really, really have to get out of my life. Now. And it really doesn't matter that no one has ever had the courage to stay and wrestle with me and my complexity, until now. I don't really care if it takes time to find that person who will surpass you in every aspect, at least I will know he is more than worthy to have me. One lesser cannot survive. And you, of all people, know that and I know that is why you f*cking feel confident that I will remain without any man beside me for another lifetime. Guess what? I believe otherwise.

 

You are not the only man alive. You are not the only exceptional man alive. You are not the only extra ordinary, brilliant, passionate man alive. I have met a dozen after you. Its just that nobody dared stay, or linger... But I have hope, and I have faith. One day, he'll fly my way. And he will not betray me like you did. For now, true, I have none, and maybe for a long time I will have no one, but that doesn't mean I will take you back. Only a dog goes back to its vomit.

 

True, I am not even close to trusting again, as I keep proving that in general, men have a hard time making themselves trustworthy. I am not giving up on myself, though. I will get to that point where I will finally stand still and have peace in my heart about finding the right one, finally. I don't care how long it takes. I will get there.

 

I have always strived to preserve your integrity, by keeping to myself the reason why I cannot walk down the aisle with you. I will continue to do so. Just please, get out of my life. There is simply no room for you, but in the archives of my heart. I have sealed that a long time ago, and the only things that seep out are dusts, molds, and mites.... I cannot even recall anymore how it feels to kiss you, or how it was to make love to you... Fragments of images stay, but the experience has left me.

 

Please go. Let me be. I wish to be happy, too.

 

 

C.

[LostCommand]

"Better a rough plan, violently executed now, than a perfect plan, executed tomorrow"

General GS Patton

3rd Army, US

 

Pare- trust me on this. They are after us. They are after you. Raise the alarm...

 

LC

[Wyld]

Mr Tobiiiii...

 

Pinakawalaan mo na naman sillaaaa!!!!

 

Hellppp!!

 

 

-W