The Mail Box

[iwalkalone]

yes...and friends we shall be forever and ever ...amen :hypocritesmiley:

[iwalkalone]

and you...i'm sorry....i'm sorry...there's no one else but i just can't take the risk anymore....i'm sorry...

[iwalkalone]

That red lava lamp...

that burning lamp

you say it's amusing...

yes...i do love to amuse you

but what do you really see

that mesmerizes you

each red bubble thing

swimming up slowly

as slow as when they finally

sink down...to the bottom

merging...then separating

floating..falling...

but never touching

til they become as one...

 

 

it's the heat that makes them so

so beautiful to watch...

Do you see love?

do you see life?

do you see blood?

[iwalkalone]

Thank you for everything..for this strange but beautiful friendship you've given me. I can't even begin to describe how happy you've made me....i love you...and.. yes...WE ARE FRIENDS...sabi mo weh :heart:

Edited November 19, 2006 by iwalkalone

[_sUpLaDa_]

This is just a thank you for all you have done for me,I have finally opened my eyes,I'm finally able to see,I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for you guiding me.You've played such a major role in my life, And each time i wanted to end it by picking up a knife,You would change my mind, And send me on a search for something to find. I've made a lot of mistakes,

Some more than once,

But you never gave up on me,

Always gave me another chance.

There's days i wake up wanting to just lay all day in bed,

I constantly have a thousand thoughts running through my head.I pick up pen and paper as a relief,

Writting poems of my life, some people don't believe.

Friends say i'm lucky because i'm talented and pretty, I thank them, but they don't realize, they don't see,

I have so much anger, hurt and pain built up inside of me.

I have so many questions i want to ask, But the answers i know would be a forgotten task. I find myself praying for things that i know will never change,

I ask to stop all the violence, and drug exchange.

So many young kids with no where to go,

People are praying for them, but that they will never know. I'm thanking god for the talent he has given me,

and for giving me the chance to see there's more to life-

Then what you thought there'd be.He's never let me fall,

But always made me stand tall.

[abalone]

As you have once observed, I came to you with an empty hand, an open heart and a selfless soul, always at peace with this world. The same condition holds true. My only wish is to be able to gain back my top form, soon, so that I may be able to give you more. That, I am working on.. May you have patience to bear with me..

[iwalkalone]

Hey I

 

I know how it feels...to live without a life. Like you can't seem to define what's real and what's not...like when you doubt even your own thoughts and feelings...you begin to ask yourself...is that really you? then you start to get more confused...cause you don't really know who you are...or if the real you is still inside....you feel like you're someone else...someone you hardly know. There are times when you find yourself lying to yourself...you feed yourself with convictions... you can barely grasp...

U

[iwalkalone]

awww bitch!...you are purrrrrrfect...more than my coffee and cig....you are just what i need right now! Thank you. To the one who sent you to me.... i wonder how it feels to know someone as weired as me?

come...f#&k me senseless!...

jesus christ I think i'm posessed...and it's high noon!!!

Edited November 23, 2006 by iwalkalone

[LostCommand]

This for you. In the middle of the day and in the rush of decisions, this for you.

 

Iris

And I'd give up forever to touch you

Cause I know that you feel me somehow

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be

And I don't want to go home right now Verse 2

 

And all I can taste is this moment

And all I can breathe is your life

Cause sooner or later it's over

I just don't want to miss you tonight Chorus

 

And I don't want the world to see me

Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am Verse 3

 

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming

Or the moment of truth in your lies

When everything seems like the movies

Yeah you bleed just to know your alive

 

Chorus

 

And I don't want the world to see me

Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

Chorus

 

I don't want the world to see me

Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

[iwalkalone]

I Love You And More

 

I don’t want it now

But maybe I am ready

And technically ready and want are two entirely different things

I wanted you to think differently

I didn’t want to be compared

This is entirely different

I am entirely different

This is nothing like the last time

But maybe I was wrong

Maybe you should consider this with past regrets

And I should be the virgin of innocence

But you talk to me as I’m the small, the tiny

The one who is naïve, and hasn’t thought in years

But that’s not true

I love you

Did you forget that very important detail

The only reason this thought has come up at all

I don’t need to secure my part in your life

I already know I have a place locked in your future

This is to prove nothing

This is to show you nothing

This is to give myself to you entirely

This is to saying I love you and more

 

 

 

 

f#&k! i do miss my sims!!!!!!!!!! i wanna die!!!!!!! :cry:

[iwalkalone]

Girl...i know you...you can read between the lines...you've always been good at that....hush...it's ok....i understand why you had to cry....i know.....i know you.....

i know you wanna say..."I can't go on not loving you.....and it hurts so bad.........."

Edited November 26, 2006 by iwalkalone

[LostCommand]

I read today that the extent of killings of leftists is such it even got to the pages of Time International.

 

Sison, you stupid fool, you started this, now they will end it, inevitably dragging both of you down. You think that the war-buddies of Lagman, Kintanar, Balweg, et all, the battle tested field commanders you ordered killed for deserting you, after they decided to step down upon Marcos's death, will just sit by and wait for your 20-something hitsquads to mow them all down? Ano sila, tatanga-tanga? They did not achieve their high body counts by idly reading Maoist texts on an rocking chair 12,000 kms away from the site of blood and bodies and peasants in chains. Gago!

 

So they broke Omerta, they fingered every last one, they led them to all your boys' hideouts, innocent and guilty alike. They may be mangmang, but dammit they are not tanga, to continue following one who has forgotten that we are here to serve the people of the 21st centrury, and not to merely worship the koranic verses of marx's and engels' 1890 literary works. Ginagago mo ba kami? It is you and your ilk who belong to Lenin's dustbin. Even Red China itself changed tacked, and of all the stupid things, you told the Reds that their modern interpretation of communism was wrong? More catholic than the pope, are you? Now even Red China wants you in the Terror List,

 

Gago!

 

With old solidarity gone, and blinded by the deaths of comrades, yes, they invited the normally clueless ineffective, and stupid Army wolves to dinner; did you think they would pity those 20 somethings who were dining at the same table at you? The old commanders were killing by the busloads before these newbies were born, gago! Now their young post-Edsa blood is drenching the countryside, and guess what? No one is organising the people to stop these journalists, labourleaders, and priests from getting it in the guts. At least, not the oldies; their silence, as the old masa leaders, is deafening. They will have the stupid Army wolves go about gorging and killing, these wolves are good at that, and we will not lead the people as we have so often done before. Not until this bloodletting is done, and your ilk are dead.

 

Hundreds more are left to die as I write these lines; for the old masa leaders have struck our counter-deal with the military. And they will keep their silence.

 

They will not let their creation be subverted by you, who have not led a single squad to battle, who has not killed a single man with his own hands, and who now pretends to know more strategy than the field leaders. They would rather burn this organisation down and start anew, rather than let it k*ll them. Obvious ba? Hundreds more will die, many had it coming, this blundered revolution is now being deliberately turned inwards to eat its own children; and with such historical ease that you are now panicking and appealing to GMA for a stop. Asa ka pa, gago!

 

Just like Aguinaldo killing Luna and Mabini and so dooming himself, you have started killing your leaders, and now you are doomed. This time your henchmen are included, and many innocents too. Lions led by sheep always, always come to naught. Especially if the lions are juvenile and the sheep is deaf and blind. And matched against old cagey lions, leading unthinking overgrown wolves. Tis just a matter of time, gago.

 

The only mistake they will admit to, is that they should have reached over and have you killed in the Hague where you are hiding, much earlier on, and avoid all this.

 

I admit I revel in this revenge, this bloodbath, as every last labour leader and pro-sison boys will be killed, slain, innocent and guilty and suspect alike, reserving my best champagne for the coming death of Satur, Beltran, and Rosal (how I await that day of days, perspiring with anticipation of killings gone well).

 

But I know it may not end here. The army, having (re) discovered how easy it is to k*ll after all, will keep on killing, reaching even the middle and upper class, the business men who do not give lagay, the governors who do not give protection money, and the mayors who refuse to put up jueteng fronts, and then the whole country is thrown back to martial law and the middle class again extinguished. This economic risk is my main fear, that like sharks in a freeding frenzy, the killing may go on across all classes and all sectors, and drag the whole country down.

 

It is a risk indeed, but in my anger and my bloodlust, today I do not see this risk too well. I only see the order of battle, and squirm with the thought of the killings to come soon,

 

tomorrow even,

 

It is a risk indeed, and in 2026, I do not know what country I may inherit, perhaps another Columbia, or one resembling a broke African country, emaciated kids everywhere. And I know that this is the violent cycle I may inherit, when my generation would step in 15 to 20 years from now. I am therefore almost about to speak out against such violence, but truly, so many of them cannot wait until the time comes to get the top Sisonites, and wait in sweaty anticipation when the time comes to break their finger bones, then the long arm and leg bones, then the rib cages, then the back bone, and then finally the skulls, with that liquid brainy thwack. One by one, each Sisonite awaiting his turn in sight of the beating floor. Their bodies left in the middle of Edsa, for full effect.

 

Sison, do not ask for a ceasefire from Gloria, gago, ask for a ceasefire from the buddies of Kintanar et al!

 

You started the fire, gago. Now hundred would perish first before they will talk with you again. Only with such a long list of dead Sisonites, will the playing field be truly even.

 

Live and let die!

 

LC

[chiquezee]

C -

 

How was the trip? I hope you weren't that tired driving all those miles on a special day such as today. I guess as we grow older, the value of what once excited us diminishes and every moment is just like the last, and the next. They come and go, regardless of how we see it. King Solomon was right. Senseless, everything is senseless.

 

I'm sorry I had to say what I said. I wanted to regret deciding but that was no hasty decision. I sat, walked, looked beyond the walls, searched the tiled floor for reasons to say otherwise -- but something inside me tugged my senses and I had to...

 

I have lost the right to regret and I have to live with the statement. It stands. You know how much I wish I could. What you don't know is how much I want, but can't. Its all about weighing priorities. I value something far deeper than what I can have in a momentary snap of euphoria. I choose that.

 

Its a lose-lose situation and I'd rather withdraw now than admit defeat farther on. At least I can boldly declare, my head is bloody, but unbowed.

 

But to be more real... I would always wonder. I will keep on going back to this day when I stood firm at the edge of the cliff, looked down, and made the wise choice to step back, ever so carefully. One day, I will smile and gaze at someone else's eyes and know that I did well this moment.

 

It is not cowardice to do the right thing. I have always dared, testing the limits of my bounds, so you know the reason isn't that I want to retreat out of fear. It is the desire to be courageous in meeting what is unknown head-on that drove me to take the road less travelled. I hope you understand.

 

On a more mortal exchange, I will have a pair of green eyes flashing at the back of my head, from time to time, and I will wonder if having a pair of emeralds will also make you more fascinated with me. Perhaps not. I am mere mortal to the gods you have among you. Perhaps a nymph, but never a goddess, at least not to you.

 

And so I say good night, dearest. You have been a part of me. I will write you again, even in here, knowing someday you'll chance upon it and laugh yourself to pieces, with a curse playfully spitting from your lips, and a chuckle of endearment for what used to be your momentary "south babe". Then you'll remember me and will want me all over again. But for now, I lay my head to deep slumber. Looking forward to tomorrow without you.

 

- C

[LostCommand]

Pinsan,

 

I know what it is to be strong, dammit. I know what it is to sweat and tire and stoop under that iron mask, the straps cutting into your cheeks; I know what it is to be unforgiven, I know what it is to have done the irreversible, and dammit I know what it is to live with compromises, seemingly only increasing by the decade. I know how it is to be marked and branded from birth, to be born with venom dripping from your pores, necessary or no.

 

Who are we doing this for, tell me? Who!? You know who, damn you!!

 

chin up, chin up! dammit! do not buckle now!

 

How are we going to teach the next ones the hunger for passions, the lust for glory and adventure, the need for dreams? You do not get hungry, you cannot teach hunger. You do not dream, you cannot teach dreams, you want no glory you will inspire none such for others. Anyone can absorb losses and defend the fort, anyone, dammit how many Bataans do we have to fight to prove ability in defense??

 

But to lead the counterstrikes, into the rear and at the dead of night, relying on blind luck and training; agility in attack...that is where we go!

 

Do not get different women, dammit, get different dreams. Get a different you. Dammit, get the old you!

 

Snap out of it, chin up!

 

Malapit na ang Mayo, lose that girl!

 

Felix Villaflor IV

[willow_boy]

Fred,

 

You're a nice guy and I appreciate all the things you've done for me. However, I still do not see myself staying for another year. There are some methods you use to manage the department that I do not agree with. You're a Vice President now and I hope you start acting like one. You're no longer a low-level manager at some corporation. It's quite unfortunate that with the way you run the place, there's just way too much office politics for me to deal with.

 

You're a very nice person but I'm the kind of person who is loyal to my leadership ONLY IF I fully trust it. I'll give you a chance for the next few months but after that, inspite of all the nice people in our department and inspite of everything you've done for me, I regret to say that I would have to move on.

 

Thanks.

[Grimace]

hi Peter

 

i really don't know why you were just there...its totally inevitable, 7 years of being bestfriends, though far apart, all comes to this..wow! we keep on bumping into each other like God! destined or something? we had affairs, love affaird that is, come and go, problems, working in faraway places people can only dream about going....i never thought we'd bump into each other again.. I guess the best part of it is that we never bounced into something that can completely destroy our friendship, maybe the overtly sexual episodes that we both loathed then...but what;s going to happen now?

 

you just don't get it do you?....God...where were you? and when are you going to spend the rest of your life with me?

[saucybabe]

para sa isang taong naging bahagi ng buhay ko,

 

hindi ako sigurado sa mga nangyari sa atin. ngunit sa isang bagay lang ako sigurado, minahal kita.

sana napatawad mo na ako sa mga kagagahang nagawa ko noon. siguro nga sinadya ko ang mga 'yon para masaktan ka dahil nasasaktan ako. sa bawat sabi mo ng "i love you", may kumikirot sa dibdib ko. sa bawat pangako mo na hindi natutupad, tumutulo ang luha ko. sa bawat oras na hindi ako nakakarinig ng kahit ano mula sa'yo, nararamdaman kong dahan-dahan akong namamatay.

 

hindi ikaw ang pinalaya ko, ang aking sarili. mahirap masaktan sa bawat minutong naiisip ko na ikaw sana'y nasa tabi ko. ngayong unti-unti ko nang matutunang kalimutan ka, ika'y nagbalik. kay sarap ng pakiramdam, kay sakit. dapat pinabayaan mo na ako. dapat kinalimutan na rin. sa ganoon, hindi ako nasasaktan kahit wala ang konting ligayang idinudulot mo.

naiisip ko na sana di ka na bumalik pa, na sana mawala ka na ulit. pero ang puso ko dimadaing ng konting dasal, na sana mahalin mo ako ng lubusan.

 

A

Edited November 27, 2006 by saucybabe

[johnnydrama]

Quote deleted. Inasmuch as this thread is for unsent letters and unexpressed emotion, we cant have people replying to each others posts here, now can we?

 

Just to stay on topic.

 

Meeting you time and again only serves to strengthen the unshakeable bond that we have...the passion is just as intense as the first time you laid eyes on me across the sea of anonymous faces seven years back. I still recall the way you snuggled close to me and laid out that mischievous woman-child smile of yours.

 

Now here we are, once again separated by distance, but we look forward to seeing each other and maybe even doing what we have long planned to do...I've always been there through your repeated, futile infatuations with those who have disappointed or misunderstood you. Maybe if we could give each other the luxury to stop time and step into a private universe of our own design, I could experience what it means to be fulfilled....

 

Till then...mein liebe...halten Sie meine Rosen nah an Ihrem Herzen

Edited November 27, 2006 by Wyld

[iwalkalone]

To you...you..and all of you...

 

I'm sorry...ganito lang talaga ako....pasensya na kayo....sana ok lang kayo...i didn't mean to...it never was my intention to ...

i'm just...maybe i am...maybe...i don't know. I'm sorry......

[spongebobby]

they call me the iceman, you know--the guy who'll remain cool and unaffected. work, love--doesn't matter. they won't affect me.

 

that's why i cannot understand why your writing makes me sad, why i feel your pain, why my heart bleeds with you. dang! i don't even know you.

 

i want to come to you, hug you, and tell you that it's gonna be alright--but i can't. i still live by my belief that in this virtual world, it is best that i am just a cartoon characer. and yes, you deserve a real person.

 

time to say goodbye. for now.

 

i'd rather write software than write this.

[chiquezee]

Dang! You got me again! Just when I thought I had the upper hand of the situation, you turn the tables around and caught me off guard. I have to admit that I have met my match. You seem to know how to make me take a step back. I despise that because you are challenging me and drawing me even closer. Lets wait tomorrow.....

 

still the chiq

[naked_angel]

you know what happened, ace. you happened.

the thing is whatever it is about you that i love, i don't want to take it for granted anymore. but at the same time i don't want to spoil it either. i'm tired of being scared. and i don't think that we're only together because we're scared of being on our own...

the fights will always be there. we will always argue about the people we fear will destroy us. but we know we will always have that one special place we can go back to. to talk, to settle things and to celebrate what we have.

so to happy thoughts. marathons. burning the lines. sms. alis alis. pillows. cold and sleepless nights. secret places. recess. baby einstein and lava girl. love and relationship.

to everything which matters to us

[iwalkalone]

I can't say.....you should'nt tell...you shouldn't say...sorry...there was no reason for you to care about how I'd feel...or what I'd think about you...so...so what if I learned about your mischief.....and so what if you keep doing it...or wutever... I am just a worthless insignificant other....

thanks for waking me up.... but my eyes are still...whutif i just go back to sleep....again?........sad world...........I need.... coffee na lang dear.

Edited November 28, 2006 by iwalkalone

[peanutbutterdude]

To Myself:

 

Bakit mo nakalimutan bumili ng peanutbutter? :cry:

[saucybabe]

alam mo na siguro kung sino ka... you don't have to promise me something tapos pagtataguan mo lang ako. it's not easy na magtiis ng walang kain for several days because bawat araw sinasabi mo na tutulong ka.

i'm not angry at you. i'm angry at myself because i trusted you, i believed in the things you've told me. it's been more than a week now, wala pa ring nagkatotoo sa mga sinabi mo.

masakit isiping napakatanga ko. kasalanan ko rin nga siguro. kung noon ko pa napagdesisyunan na mag-PSP, kung di lang ako nagpadala sa mga pang-uuto mo, di sana magkakaganito.

sana lang wag mo itong gawin sa iba. now that ive learned my lesson, maski isa sa sasabihin mo hindi na ako maniniwala.