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A Complicated Relationship


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its really complicated if you're partner doesn't communicate with you.. all the while you thought that everything is fine, just so happens she's looking for another to play with.. god, i hate being in love, being blind is the most hateful thing to feel

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  • 3 weeks later...

I'm a firm believer that if you are really meant to be then there shouldn't be any problems. At the very least dapat kayong dalawa walang problema sa isa't isa.

 

From my own experience and from what I've gathered in watching a lot of friends and acquaintances fall in and out of love is that those relationships which really work, work from the get-go.

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I like that quote... Blaise Pascal "The heart has reasons which reason knows nothing of.” :thumbsupsmiley:

 

Well I think complicated relationships help me become a better individual... help me see what I can do for love, paint my world a lot colorful and challenging.... Hehe as long as I know when to guage if it's too much na...

Edited by Seishi
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  • 2 weeks later...

mahirap talaga ng uncertained/complicated relationship. kc hindi mo alam kung saan ang lugar mo.

hindi mo alam ang mga karapatan mo. nagseselos ka pero di mo derechong masabi kasi takot ka sa result ng pagsasabi mo.

 

*pero as long as i am happy..sige na nga go parin. :hypocritesmiley:

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When both are open on their relationships, complications became uncomplicated. Keeping it simple, stupid (KISS). Example is hunkie Eric "McSteamy" Dane & his hottie wife Rebecca... currently the hottest talk in American town for their sex 'scandal' tape.

 

Their 'scandal' - 1st SCOOP dito sa MTC (layered scoop na, for other media), tape snipppet uri link here~ http://gawker.com/5339221/danes-anatomy-mc...ne=true&s=x

post-212938-1250649845.jpg

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  • 4 months later...

...im seeking for advice for i think a complicated relationship. T_T

 

I came back from abroad as OFW and decided to finish my studies. I enrolled in a school where i met him, the man who believes and supported me all the way, academically and motivated me to study well. He treated me very much well. He also work before abroad and we have the same career. Though we have the same professional stand but present status, he was my mentor and i am his student.

 

He showed this unusual support for me and he easily gets affected to things that he wasn't suppose to interfere. Like small internal class issues. I already beg one time because jealousy between classes increases because he always in favor in my class. He even help us for our extra class activities and dared to joined us or participated in our role play, which becomes a big issues again.

 

Before ending the semester, he calls and even open up his own issues in school and even his outside matters like extra work or his part-time jobs. Even his past issues, he open up with me. which shocked me a lot, coz hello... "I'm a student too" ... at that point. i dont have any feelings towards him.

 

Then, i transferred school...funny, coz he too resigned and transferred to the school where i was... we became more closed, we eat together, go out and shop together. Realizing I fallen for him...its like I always wanted to see him around, but im praying that he wouldn't be my instructor to any of my subjects...thank God he didn't...

 

 

He told me one time 3 years is just a short time to wait. and I agreed with him. I promised myself that i will study well and participate more in school activities...and i did reach it. And he was so much proud of me.

 

This month, his mother past away, though he let me talk to her before that. His mother told me that he (his son) love me too much and I should take good care of her son. He went back to his hometown for a week....he never call nor text. He has 2 mobile nos. and he told me not to call or text him in the other one. I just followed...he came back like his not the same guy, he was pale and very sad...he didn't talked to me that day, I do understand because i know his in the midst of his mom's death... everyone asking him what's wrong, but he only says nothing. The next day, at our school his wife and son came and he just introduced them to his colleagues. And i was just standing there like he didn't see me...well im just his student... but i observed...he never had a smile in his face...one thing i was so fond about him...he always smiles too me...I never knew he was married and has a son. We even have visited his house and no trace of a child with him. Nor his photoalbum, nothing.

 

Now, he admit to me he was married 3 years already. His son doesnt live with him but with his in-laws, his wife is not here but abroad. But i didn't see any trace of happiness when we spoke about his wife, except when we spoke about his son...

 

After this revelation, he just like changed...he never send me messages nor call. At school, we never talk, we just like strangers again. My heart is paining now loving him... and I can't concentrate on my studies seeing him becoming pale and thin everytime...our situation as student - teacher already complicated now knowing he is married its become more complicated than ever

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  • 3 weeks later...
I met my GF from MIRC and we would text each other occasionally. I would stayed up til the wee hours of the morning keeping her company thru text while she studies. She was happy with what I’m doing coz she said it’s been years since a guy did this to her. After a few weeks of texting, she said she likes me although she hasn’t seen me yet. We finally met and went out a few times after that she started falling for me and vice versa until it became us.

 

We have an 11 years age gap and she said her parents are very strict to the point that they would lock her up in a room if they find out she was entertaining suitors secretly like what happened before. Her parents are traditional and don’t want a suitor nor BF from online chats. My GF likes to chat and I saw it in her email sent folder that she sends her pic to various guys but since the date was before we met, I just let it be.

 

During the courtship, she would tell me that she’s not yet over her ex completely although she was the one who broke up with him. During the relationship, she would still, sometimes, mention her ex although she would apologize for doing so. She said she would sometimes find herself crying whenever she thinks of her ex, siguro dahil tinago niya yung hurt at walang nasabihan...according to her.

 

More than a week after we had the relationship, she broked up with me saying she’s not happy anymore and other nonsense reason, she mentioned about our age gap and was afraid what people might think and problems with her parents about how we met. I beg her to stay but to no avail. After a day, she texted me that she feels sad without me so naging kami ulit.

 

During our 1st month, I noticed that she’s not that into me yet. There were no bday card nor present for me and no monthsary gift nor card. I thought it might be normal since the relationship is still new. Few days after our 1st month, she confessed that she was having 2nd thoughts about continuing the relationship coz of what people might think about our age gap that’s why she’s not that into me daw. She thinks things over and realized that her happiness was more important so she decided to continue the relationship.

 

She would tell me that she met the relatives of her ex on two occasions and she also told me that sometimes her ex would text her and sometimes ask her out but she didn’t obliged daw.

 

After that, things went great for a few weeks until she became busy with school coz of the coming finals. So I had to understand if she’s not that into me coz of being busy.

 

Few weeks after our 2nd month, I was shocked to find out she had a secret friendster account that she kept from me. On that account, I would guess were people really close to her while the one I know were for people she met from online chatrooms. What’s more shocking was the primary pic. The pic was with her ex embracing her and the date she placed on the caption of that pic was dated 2 weeks after it became us. In short, she met up with her ex without my knowledge and I’m not sure if they’re still seeing each other until now and if they still communicate thru text.

 

I didn’t confront my gf regarding that coz I’m saving it for other occasions. Tsaka I’m afraid to tell her that I found out about her secret friendster account while looking at the messages in her sent folder. I don’t want her to use that against me para ako magmukhang may kasalanan kung magbreak kami and most of all I still love her. another thing ay pwede niyang sabihin past na yun, coz it happened during the first month where she confessed she's not that into me. but still she lied diba.

 

The first Saturday after her finals, she didn’t text me for so long, negative thoughts started to cloud my mind. It turns out she left her cellphone so I just let it be kahit na walang effort in her part to borrow her sister’s cp and letting me know man lang. The 2nd Saturday, she didn’t even text me for practically the whole day again. The next day, she said she can’t send any text messages nor make a call coz of network error and she apologized. I just told her na sana man lang she made an effort to borrow her sister’s cp to let me know what’s going on coz I was worried about her. She apologized again and I just let it be.

 

I then asked where she went that day and I got the surprised of my life when she texted back that she wants to break up with me already. She said she wants us to be just friends coz she’s too afraid of her parents and cannot be proud of me like I am for her…that she can’t risk it all for me even if she really loves me. She said it’s better this way para sarili lang niya iintindihin niya. She said that I deserve someone better and she don’t want to hurt me anymore coz I’ve been very good to her. I was so hurt that I didn’t even thought of begging her to stay anymore and so I just let her go.

 

After that, she kept texting me that she still loves me but haven’t been a good gf. She has to go coz she doesn’t want to hurt as nice guy like me anymore and so on. It is at this point where I took the opportunity to tell her my concern about her not being into me like, not calling me, we didn’t get to talk on the phone that much, binabalewala ako minsan especially if she can’t text, di niya nagagawa sa akin mga nagagawa niya sa ex niya and etc.

 

Two days passed she’s still texting me and telling me she loves me. She kept saying she misses me and feels incomplete without me..that she feels miserable breaking up with me and that’s how she realized she loves me after all. I was so hurt that I didn’t realize she wants me back from what she’s texting me. She has pride to tell it to me straight that she wants me back. She cried for 2 days daw coz she thought I was gone for good na coz I let her go so easily this time.

 

After she gave more clues that she wants me back, I told her I want her back also. Kaya lang, since may hinanakit daw ako sa kanya (yung complain ko na she’s not into me) she told me we are better off as friends muna until she sorts out her problems sa side niya and she needs time and effort daw. gusto niya kasi the 2nd time around na maging kami, ay fair na sa akin at hindi na maging one sided yung relationship at magawa na niya mga nagagawa niya sa ex niya and even more.

 

She didn’t mentioned about her ex as part of the problem pero kutob ko part of it yun. She just said that her fear for her parents is the one affecting her to be sweet to me. Sometimes she can separate the fear from being sweet but usually can’t, pati paglabas namin laging patago at hindi man lang niya ako mapakilala sa magulang niya. May nakakita na sa amin at sinumbong sa mom niya, when her mom asked her hindi man lang niya masabing bf kahit na nandiyan yung opportunity she just said classmate at nakasalubong lang niya. She don’t have the courage daw. She asked me to date others baka mas masaya ako dun, I told her ayaw ko at gusto ko siya. I asked her to tell me directly if the problem will be fix and I’ll wait, if not then just break up nalang. She told me it would be much better if I could wait for her kasi maaayos pa yung problem. She can fix the problem while kami pa rin pero it would take time and effort, baka umangal na naman daw ako kapag nababalewala niya ako.

 

I told her I’m not comfortable as being friends, kung friends lang wag nalang. I told her since she said maaayos pa yung problem then why not kami pa rin pero parang cool off nalang but we will still see each other like before and talk parin, pumayag naman siya although deep inside ayaw ko ng cool off, i just have to say that para maging kami parin coz i'm not comfortable sa friends setup.

 

After the breakup, we met up and made love like we usually do as if nothing happened pero when I asked her kung normal na ulit kami she said mas ok kapag cool off stage nalang para less pressure on her side, I asked what she means, mahirap daw iexplain kaya hindi na ako nangulit pa. We would still meet pa naman, and we still greet each other sa monthsary.

 

I’m very confused as to where this relationship is heading. All I know is hindi siya sure sa akin, dahil ayaw niya magpapicture kami sa studio, she doesn’t introduced me to at least her sister whom she’s very close to and can keep a secret, she still hasn’t told me about her secret friendster account, the primary pic of she and her ex embracing her is still there with “married” status. One more thing, I also saw the friendster of her ex and both of them have the same primary pic. I can’t look more into it coz it’s locked to closely connected members only.

 

I don’t know if her parent’s is really that strict or she’s using that to delay the introduction part coz she’s still considering her ex or baka naman her ex is actually her bf right now and I’m just a mean time guy habang my problem relationship nila kaya hindi niya ako maharap sa magulang. Or she loves me but is still afraid of what people might thing of our huge age gap.

 

- What do you guys think? Is this about the ex, age gap, she’s a player coz she likes to chat minsan she doesn't let me know that she's chatting maybe coz she knows super seloso ako o may ginagawa lang siya kalokohan, or case of parents too strict? Can you say she really loves me? I hope she’s not a player coz wala sa itsura niya and she has a good reputation in school coz masipag magaral but looks can be deceiving as they say. Any advice or suggestions?

 

- Mali ba ako na sinabi ko sa kanya yung concern ko sa relationship like she’s not into me at nagiging one sided yung relationship? Or tama lang since serious relationship naman ito?

 

- Does the cool off make any sense at all? For me parang walang sense, since she said she really loves me then why not fix the problem ASAP rather than isipin niya na baka umangal ulit ako.

 

 

pare ko, by the way your story was told... sa tingin ko ay in love ka talaga sa kanya... and your dead serious about this girl of yours...

you also mentioned that you made love? an indication that she also has a feeling towards you... but, what is bothering you is the account you discovered knowing that she and her ex is still keeping... this is hard to prove.

having a conservative parents is not anymore an issue since she can get through with it, you prove it yourself.

what i want to know is, if you are spending for her needs? yung: additional allowance, load, bagong cell phone and other personal expenses that she can't afford due to the tight budget she is in. dito lang tayo magkakatalo... baka ginagawa ka lang niyang sugar daddy? ingat lang... weigh the expenses you are incurring against the joy of making love with her... masarap umibig... masakit lang ang maloko.

and since you are dead serious about this girl, umakyat ka ng ligaw sa bahay nila para malaman mo ang tunay na pagkatao ng pamilya nila. tell her parents your intentions.

a friendly advice bro... lalaki din ako.

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  • 9 months later...

...im seeking for advice for i think a complicated relationship. T_T

 

I came back from abroad as OFW and decided to finish my studies. I enrolled in a school where i met him, the man who believes and supported me all the way, academically and motivated me to study well. He treated me very much well. He also work before abroad and we have the same career. Though we have the same professional stand but present status, he was my mentor and i am his student.

 

He showed this unusual support for me and he easily gets affected to things that he wasn't suppose to interfere. Like small internal class issues. I already beg one time because jealousy between classes increases because he always in favor in my class. He even help us for our extra class activities and dared to joined us or participated in our role play, which becomes a big issues again.

 

Before ending the semester, he calls and even open up his own issues in school and even his outside matters like extra work or his part-time jobs. Even his past issues, he open up with me. which shocked me a lot, coz hello... "I'm a student too" ... at that point. i dont have any feelings towards him.

 

Then, i transferred school...funny, coz he too resigned and transferred to the school where i was... we became more closed, we eat together, go out and shop together. Realizing I fallen for him...its like I always wanted to see him around, but im praying that he wouldn't be my instructor to any of my subjects...thank God he didn't...

 

 

He told me one time 3 years is just a short time to wait. and I agreed with him. I promised myself that i will study well and participate more in school activities...and i did reach it. And he was so much proud of me.

 

This month, his mother past away, though he let me talk to her before that. His mother told me that he (his son) love me too much and I should take good care of her son. He went back to his hometown for a week....he never call nor text. He has 2 mobile nos. and he told me not to call or text him in the other one. I just followed...he came back like his not the same guy, he was pale and very sad...he didn't talked to me that day, I do understand because i know his in the midst of his mom's death... everyone asking him what's wrong, but he only says nothing. The next day, at our school his wife and son came and he just introduced them to his colleagues. And i was just standing there like he didn't see me...well im just his student... but i observed...he never had a smile in his face...one thing i was so fond about him...he always smiles too me...I never knew he was married and has a son. We even have visited his house and no trace of a child with him. Nor his photoalbum, nothing.

 

Now, he admit to me he was married 3 years already. His son doesnt live with him but with his in-laws, his wife is not here but abroad. But i didn't see any trace of happiness when we spoke about his wife, except when we spoke about his son...

 

After this revelation, he just like changed...he never send me messages nor call. At school, we never talk, we just like strangers again. My heart is paining now loving him... and I can't concentrate on my studies seeing him becoming pale and thin everytime...our situation as student - teacher already complicated now knowing he is married its become more complicated than ever

 

It is just a shame that we first hide our intentions and reveal later. If I were the man being loved in here, I would straighten things out by facing the issues . Not ignoring it. I will have to face the music and take the consequence. That is why If one enters into a relationship, lay all the cards on the table and then work on the ulterior motive. But then again In your case it is not easy to delete things just like that cause you are in love, ultimately, it is you who will decide and nobody else can deter you from that decision. good luck and God bless.

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I don't know if this is complicated or am I just complicating things. I was attracted to this OJT of ours in our company. Age gap? 7 years. Sweet and sociable girl. At first just the usual infatuation with a girl. That's it. The problem was I still had communication with my ex. This OJT of ours is close to me. I don't know if she has interest in me too and I didn't bother to ask. Me and my ex were quarreling over text cause I thought she was trying to make up with me and this OJT is showing some kind of affection during those times. I was so confused back then and logic came out of the window. I had my ex over the phone treating me some kind of crap and I have someone beside me showing affection (baka malambing lang talaga). Then I decided to take a risk. Nagtapat ako sa OJT namin. She was surprised regarding my revelation and fell silent. Days, weeks passed by. Medyo ilang and I decided to just take everything through letter. Ayoko namang guluhin yung training niya and for me, I want her to finish what she was intended to do. But I also don't want to hide what I am feeling for her cause that's what I felt. She's still aloof from me. I understand cause maybe because of our superior-subordinate relationship. I also don't want to take advantage that I'm her mentor at isisingit ko yung panliligaw during business hours. Di yata maganda yun. I sent multiple letters to her telling my intentions and no reply came. Weeks, months passed and still no response, just smiles and glances. I wanted badly to talk to her personally so I decided to give a present for us to have a communication. I gave her a phone and she sent it back to me together with a letter telling me that she won't give me a chance whatsoever cause she's not feeling the same way. Kung pwede friends na lang daw. Sa akin ok lang but I think she's not being reasonable by leading me to a false hope which lasted for months. (Was it a false hope?) I stopped courting her. But she's showing affections again. What the heck? What should I do?

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I don't know if this is complicated or am I just complicating things. I was attracted to this OJT of ours in our company. Age gap? 7 years. Sweet and sociable girl. At first just the usual infatuation with a girl. That's it. The problem was I still had communication with my ex. This OJT of ours is close to me. I don't know if she has interest in me too and I didn't bother to ask. Me and my ex were quarreling over text cause I thought she was trying to make up with me and this OJT is showing some kind of affection during those times. I was so confused back then and logic came out of the window. I had my ex over the phone treating me some kind of crap and I have someone beside me showing affection (baka malambing lang talaga). Then I decided to take a risk. Nagtapat ako sa OJT namin. She was surprised regarding my revelation and fell silent. Days, weeks passed by. Medyo ilang and I decided to just take everything through letter. Ayoko namang guluhin yung training niya and for me, I want her to finish what she was intended to do. But I also don't want to hide what I am feeling for her cause that's what I felt. She's still aloof from me. I understand cause maybe because of our superior-subordinate relationship. I also don't want to take advantage that I'm her mentor at isisingit ko yung panliligaw during business hours. Di yata maganda yun. I sent multiple letters to her telling my intentions and no reply came. Weeks, months passed and still no response, just smiles and glances. I wanted badly to talk to her personally so I decided to give a present for us to have a communication. I gave her a phone and she sent it back to me together with a letter telling me that she won't give me a chance whatsoever cause she's not feeling the same way. Kung pwede friends na lang daw. Sa akin ok lang but I think she's not being reasonable by leading me to a false hope which lasted for months. (Was it a false hope?) I stopped courting her. But she's showing affections again. What the heck? What should I do?

 

maybe that's just her personality bro, or maybe she's just "malambing" because like what you said, trainee lang siya so, she's just adjusting to her surroundings and like what you also posted, subordinate mo siya....

 

sometimes, we misinterpret the things we have, happened to me a lot of times also...but it's good that she admitted na wala siyang feelings sayo, if i were you, that is already that..

 

good luck bro!!!

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maybe that's just her personality bro, or maybe she's just "malambing" because like what you said, trainee lang siya so, she's just adjusting to her surroundings and like what you also posted, subordinate mo siya....

 

sometimes, we misinterpret the things we have, happened to me a lot of times also...but it's good that she admitted na wala siyang feelings sayo, if i were you, that is already that..

 

good luck bro!!!

 

agree ako dito. some girls are just malambing by nature. sa lahat malambing sila kaya madalas namimisinterpret. nakaencounter na ko nito, and bro, ang sakit sa ulo.

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I don't know if this is complicated or am I just complicating things. I was attracted to this OJT of ours in our company. Age gap? 7 years. Sweet and sociable girl. At first just the usual infatuation with a girl. That's it. The problem was I still had communication with my ex. This OJT of ours is close to me. I don't know if she has interest in me too and I didn't bother to ask. Me and my ex were quarreling over text cause I thought she was trying to make up with me and this OJT is showing some kind of affection during those times. I was so confused back then and logic came out of the window. I had my ex over the phone treating me some kind of crap and I have someone beside me showing affection (baka malambing lang talaga). Then I decided to take a risk. Nagtapat ako sa OJT namin. She was surprised regarding my revelation and fell silent. Days, weeks passed by. Medyo ilang and I decided to just take everything through letter. Ayoko namang guluhin yung training niya and for me, I want her to finish what she was intended to do. But I also don't want to hide what I am feeling for her cause that's what I felt. She's still aloof from me. I understand cause maybe because of our superior-subordinate relationship. I also don't want to take advantage that I'm her mentor at isisingit ko yung panliligaw during business hours. Di yata maganda yun. I sent multiple letters to her telling my intentions and no reply came. Weeks, months passed and still no response, just smiles and glances. I wanted badly to talk to her personally so I decided to give a present for us to have a communication. I gave her a phone and she sent it back to me together with a letter telling me that she won't give me a chance whatsoever cause she's not feeling the same way. Kung pwede friends na lang daw. Sa akin ok lang but I think she's not being reasonable by leading me to a false hope which lasted for months. (Was it a false hope?) I stopped courting her. But she's showing affections again. What the heck? What should I do?

 

Mahirap talgang tanggapin ang rejection, leave her alone, yun ang sabi nya eh. Matatapos din OJT nya and hopefully pag di mo na nakakasama palagi eh makalimutan mo na rin yan. Ayusin mo na lag yung problema mo sa ex mo kung gusto mo pa sya kung hindi there's no point talking to her as well. Kapag sinabi sa iyo na gusto ka lang nya maging kaibigan, nagiging polite lang siya sa iyo. Nag OJT sya kaya kahit bad trip sya at di ka nya type, kailangan ka niyang pakisamahan, try mo pag hindi na sya dyan nag train dyan and you will see what she really feels. For the meantime, keep ignoring her "affection", baka nagpapantasya ka lang. Sorry kung medyo prangka sagot ko, no other way to put it.

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Mahirap talgang tanggapin ang rejection, leave her alone, yun ang sabi nya eh. Matatapos din OJT nya and hopefully pag di mo na nakakasama palagi eh makalimutan mo na rin yan. Ayusin mo na lag yung problema mo sa ex mo kung gusto mo pa sya kung hindi there's no point talking to her as well. Kapag sinabi sa iyo na gusto ka lang nya maging kaibigan, nagiging polite lang siya sa iyo. Nag OJT sya kaya kahit bad trip sya at di ka nya type, kailangan ka niyang pakisamahan, try mo pag hindi na sya dyan nag train dyan and you will see what she really feels. For the meantime, keep ignoring her "affection", baka nagpapantasya ka lang. Sorry kung medyo prangka sagot ko, no other way to put it.

 

I agree with this. Plenty of fish in the sea. I know you can't help how you feel pero it's pointless to go all out in a war that's lost even before it started. This affects her too and she IS trying to be professional about it. Don't make it any harder than it already is. Kung friends, friends lang. Sabi nga ni Joey de Venecia: "Back off!"

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Mahirap talgang tanggapin ang rejection, leave her alone, yun ang sabi nya eh. Matatapos din OJT nya and hopefully pag di mo na nakakasama palagi eh makalimutan mo na rin yan. Ayusin mo na lag yung problema mo sa ex mo kung gusto mo pa sya kung hindi there's no point talking to her as well. Kapag sinabi sa iyo na gusto ka lang nya maging kaibigan, nagiging polite lang siya sa iyo. Nag OJT sya kaya kahit bad trip sya at di ka nya type, kailangan ka niyang pakisamahan, try mo pag hindi na sya dyan nag train dyan and you will see what she really feels. For the meantime, keep ignoring her "affection", baka nagpapantasya ka lang. Sorry kung medyo prangka sagot ko, no other way to put it.

 

It's ok bro. Point taken. Nakalimutan ko lang i-post eh. Everything was an illusion. Sinabi na rin sa kin minsan ng bestfriend ko na magkaiba ng priorities ang nag-aaral at nagtatrabaho na. Well at least may natutunan naman. Hehe! Thanks for the advices!

Edited by StoicVampire
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when my marriage ended, i do had complicated relationships after that....

 

the first one was we are both on the rebound so it's bound to fall, she does love her ex bf so much.....i was just looking for some company as well...

 

the second one was i didn't truly loved her but she was so nice so that's why i took her along for the ride...

 

the third one, due to certain circumstances, the relationship is not yet ripe...

 

the fourth one, was just a one night stand, wahahahahaha

 

the last one, i truly loved that lady, but again, due to certain circumstances the relationship is bound to end sooner or later....

 

 

maybe karma is rearing it's ugly head on me this time......haha

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when my marriage ended, i do had complicated relationships after that....

 

the first one was we are both on the rebound so it's bound to fall, she does love her ex bf so much.....i was just looking for some company as well...

 

the second one was i didn't truly loved her but she was so nice so that's why i took her along for the ride...

 

the third one, due to certain circumstances, the relationship is not yet ripe...

 

the fourth one, was just a one night stand, wahahahahaha

 

the last one, i truly loved that lady, but again, due to certain circumstances the relationship is bound to end sooner or later....

 

 

maybe karma is rearing it's ugly head on me this time......haha

 

Maybe karma... maybe... but there's also another point-of-view which, I feel, is a more plausible explanation.

 

In the good book, there's this adage: "love thy neighbor as thy self."

 

Very often, we focus on the "thy neighbor." We have forgotten about THY SELF.

 

Look at the whole sentence. How should we love our neighbor? The loving of thy neighbor should be the same as the loving of self.

 

In short, it is important to LOVE THY SELF. If we do not know how to love ourselves, we will never know how to love our neighbor.

 

What's my point? I feel, complicated relationships happen because we ourselves are in a "complicated situation." There's no stability in our life. Hence, we seek out ways and means to stabilize ourselves, to pacify ourselves, to fulfill ourselves, etc...

 

And we think, the solution is outside of us. But it doesn't happen. Why? Because there's no foundation in us. We are not stable, we are not at peace, we are not fulfilled.

 

I really think that when we come from a major break-up, or from an immediate troubled experience, we shouldn't try to look for a solution outside of us. Maybe, the first thing to do is to "allow the dust to settle." Then, we can see more clearly.

 

Only when there's some form of stability, that's the time to move slowly outside. When the complications in our own lives have found the resolution, it will only be then our relationships outside will be stable.

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Maybe karma... maybe... but there's also another point-of-view which, I feel, is a more plausible explanation.

 

In the good book, there's this adage: "love thy neighbor as thy self."

 

Very often, we focus on the "thy neighbor." We have forgotten about THY SELF.

 

Look at the whole sentence. How should we love our neighbor? The loving of thy neighbor should be the same as the loving of self.

 

In short, it is important to LOVE THY SELF. If we do not know how to love ourselves, we will never know how to love our neighbor.

 

What's my point? I feel, complicated relationships happen because we ourselves are in a "complicated situation." There's no stability in our life. Hence, we seek out ways and means to stabilize ourselves, to pacify ourselves, to fulfill ourselves, etc...

 

And we think, the solution is outside of us. But it doesn't happen. Why? Because there's no foundation in us. We are not stable, we are not at peace, we are not fulfilled.

 

I really think that when we come from a major break-up, or from an immediate troubled experience, we shouldn't try to look for a solution outside of us. Maybe, the first thing to do is to "allow the dust to settle." Then, we can see more clearly.

 

Only when there's some form of stability, that's the time to move slowly outside. When the complications in our own lives have found the resolution, it will only be then our relationships outside will be stable.

 

 

yeah bro, in those relationships, i still have some issues yet that i feel the need to resolve siguro kaya nagka ganun but it doesn't mean i loved them less.....siguro, in a right frame of mind, mas tumagal sana kami....but i do think i tried hard....so, maybe the next time, i would try harder as they say....

 

:)

 

thanks for the inputs sir!!

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