$weet Baby Posted March 25, 2003 Author Share Posted March 25, 2003 pasimple, it's case to case basis... of HOW YOU SAY IT....and NOT WHAT YOU SAY.... The interpretatio of what was said would really depend on the treatment of the manner you communicate... we should lay it down..... YOU WOULD GAUGE HOW MUCH SHE LOVES YOU IF SHE IS WOULD BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND THINGS AND ACCEPT YOU INSPITE OF AND DESPITE OF..... o sige tulungan mo naman ako sexy legs .... let's us say theoritically, that there are 3 things i need to tell my partner ... a) one may anak ako sa iba ... before kami naging partner. very young then. both theparents nilayo kami sa isa't isa. so it became just a forgotten dream. had a one night stand with her best friend. spur of the moment. outing sa beach. ang ganda nang buwan. malibog... este mabilog ang buwan. c) had an affair with her college best friend. became fu** Bu** first and then had a strong affection with each other. So .. HOW CAN I SAY IT ... and WHAT I CAN NOT SAY. pili ka kahit isa dyan ... will she be able to understand the situation ... in spite of ... and despite of .... or will she give up on me ? Well HONESTY is one of the vital factor of a relationship, if the girl really loves you she will accept all the things that happened to you before, at saka what if kung the other way around naging ganun ang situation nya will you accept her also? Ibalik ko sa iyo ang question mo. Kasi if you do well the thing that binds you together is LOVE, which is the most important thing di ba? Quote Link to comment
nico10 Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 basta like $weetbebe said... "pag may future honey na ako"... d na ako ever titingin sa iba hehehehe wag kayong bastoosh ah.... titigan niyo ng maigi yung sinabi ko baka ma miss quote ako.. titirisin ko ayo diyan eh... ay!!! may nag text.. titit titit, titit titit hehehehehehehe la lang.. sarap mangulet.... Quote Link to comment
bambina Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 pasimple, it's case to case basis... of HOW YOU SAY IT....and NOT WHAT YOU SAY.... The interpretatio of what was said would really depend on the treatment of the manner you communicate... we should lay it down..... YOU WOULD GAUGE HOW MUCH SHE LOVES YOU IF SHE IS WOULD BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND THINGS AND ACCEPT YOU INSPITE OF AND DESPITE OF..... o sige tulungan mo naman ako sexy legs .... let's us say theoritically, that there are 3 things i need to tell my partner ... a) one may anak ako sa iba ... before kami naging partner. very young then. both theparents nilayo kami sa isa't isa. so it became just a forgotten dream. had a one night stand with her best friend. spur of the moment. outing sa beach. ang ganda nang buwan. malibog... este mabilog ang buwan. c) had an affair with her college best friend. became fu** Bu** first and then had a strong affection with each other. So .. HOW CAN I SAY IT ... and WHAT I CAN NOT SAY. pili ka kahit isa dyan ... will she be able to understand the situation ... in spite of ... and despite of .... or will she give up on me ? sorry ha, not sexy_legs but just can't help but comment let's just say that you didn't tell herthen she makes a decisionthen won't that decision be based on the wrong foundation?then what if you tell her and she does accept youisn't that relationship all the more special because there are no more skeletons in the closet? i guess it does take a lot of couragebut if you really love someone, you give that person a chance to make a decision based on the truth.yun lang naman po Quote Link to comment
Guest sexy_legs Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 pasimple, it's not an east task na maging honest..... minsan asa mood ng partner mo kung sa tingin mo kaya nyang intindihin ang mga sasabihin mo, go for it... but the question is, what if that time won't come and you have to tell the truth? so take the risk.... Life is all about risk. sabi nga ni bambina and Sweet_Baby, you have to be honest, lay your cards...kahit gaano pa kasakit... mas masakit at mas magiging complicated kung patuloy mong itatago ang totoo... mas lalalim ang sugat... baka pangit pa ang kalabasan. Demo : pag tag ulan tinatakpan lang ang mga butas butas sa kalsada, maganda... panatag ulit ang daan, but habang lumalakas ang ulan at tumatagal, nabubutas ulit..... Di kaya ba mas maganda na sinibak ang mga dapat sibakin.... ang simento na lang ang nilagay? Mas matagal... mas maayos...... Ganun din sa relasyon kung based sa maraming pagtatakip butas.... kahit anong tapal mo.... lalabas at lalabas ang katotohanan.... puede namang isang irihan, iyakan, discussion.... and take it from there.... Go on.... with or without each other.... I know di madali, but that's a price to pay..... but you will reap the reward later on, WALANG KASING TULAD NG PRICE ANG PEACE OF MIND. Quote Link to comment
pasimple Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 Well HONESTY is one of the vital factor of a relationship, if the girl really loves you she will accept all the things that happened to you before, at saka what if kung the other way around naging ganun ang situation nya will you accept her also? Ibalik ko sa iyo ang question mo. Kasi if you do well the thing that binds you together is LOVE, which is the most important thing di ba? True, HONESTY is one vital factor in a relationship .... eh di sasabihin ko sa partner ko ... "Honey, i love you soo much. There's one thing you should now ... eh may weakness ako ... Kalibugan ... yung kaibigan mong si X ... may nangyari sa amin, yung kaibigan mong si Y ... at yung nakilala ko si Z may nangyari rin ... di ko naman talaga ginusto basta lang nangyari yan ... hope you learn to forgive me since you love me very much and i love you so much ... sa tutoo lang di naman love yun ... sex lang " naku, honest nga but now i should be expecting sudden changes in our relationship. Quote Link to comment
pasimple Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 sorry ha, not sexy_legs but just can't help but comment let's just say that you didn't tell herthen she makes a decisionthen won't that decision be based on the wrong foundation?then what if you tell her and she does accept youisn't that relationship all the more special because there are no more skeletons in the closet? i guess it does take a lot of couragebut if you really love someone, you give that person a chance to make a decision based on the truth.yun lang naman po bambina, let us say, that the three scenarios are all my little secret and my partners. (Eh di kasi sila kiss and tell and wala naman nakakita at nagsumbong). And because of my devotion to my partner ... decided it was a mistake and end it all ... for GOOD. she makes a decision based on the wrong foundation ? what do you mean here ???? it is either she continues with the relationship or she decides to end the relationship. the basis of her decision would not be based on the little secret on the back of my head. It is probably certain areas in our relationship that she either likes or does not like. telling her about my little secret would not help any ... other than giving her the impression that i can not control my libido when temptation arises ... Quote Link to comment
pasimple Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 pasimple, it's not an east task na maging honest..... minsan asa mood ng partner mo kung sa tingin mo kaya nyang intindihin ang mga sasabihin mo, go for it... but the question is, what if that time won't come and you have to tell the truth? so take the risk.... Life is all about risk. sabi nga ni bambina and Sweet_Baby, you have to be honest, lay your cards...kahit gaano pa kasakit... mas masakit at mas magiging complicated kung patuloy mong itatago ang totoo... mas lalalim ang sugat... baka pangit pa ang kalabasan. Demo : pag tag ulan tinatakpan lang ang mga butas butas sa kalsada, maganda... panatag ulit ang daan, but habang lumalakas ang ulan at tumatagal, nabubutas ulit..... Di kaya ba mas maganda na sinibak ang mga dapat sibakin.... ang simento na lang ang nilagay? Mas matagal... mas maayos...... Ganun din sa relasyon kung based sa maraming pagtatakip butas.... kahit anong tapal mo.... lalabas at lalabas ang katotohanan.... puede namang isang irihan, iyakan, discussion.... and take it from there.... Go on.... with or without each other.... I know di madali, but that's a price to pay..... but you will reap the reward later on, WALANG KASING TULAD NG PRICE ANG PEACE OF MIND. yes, it is not an easy task to be honest. And i do believe that as much as possible one has to have an open and honest relationship with your partner. Coming forward with events and situations that you know will hurt your partner is a touchy subject all together. And, it does not mean na kailangan one has to come forward all the time. It leads to a lot more complication and hurt feelings .... Yes, life is all about risk. And, it is all about calculated risk. And, if you calculate that the risk of your relationship turning sour is so great ... it is best that you keep it a secret until such time it is appropriate ... (he he ... when both of you turn senior citizen doon mo na lang sabihin ....) Quote Link to comment
pasimple Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 bambina ... sexy_legs ... sweet_baby ... pinag tutulungan ninyo ako. let's talk about scenarios here ... let us say si JOE had an affair with a GRO, named Sandy and had a kid. They both stayed together for two years and had to break up due to the family not accepting her and JOE fell out of love with Sandy. In other words, wala na silang relationship. Then JOE met Wifey. Fell in love and decided to spend the rest of their lives together. But Wait ... JOE has a past. What will he do ? (Step ONe: Put closure on Sandy)Joe talked to sandy and asked her that he wants to severe any ties with her. He asked Sandy to sign a document that i am not the father of the child ... etc... etc..And at the same time, give her a certain amount of financial compensation and at the same time bought a college educational plan for the child. So, a settlement has been reached. Sandy leaves the city and goes back to her province ... and get on with her life ... and the kid ... (Step two: Get Married) (Come forward)Now, Joe decided to come forward ... He told her about the past and what he did about it ... and asked her if WIFEY still accepts her ... she says yes, of course. Love talaga eh. (Not tell her)Now, Joe decided not to tell her ... and they got married. A big chapter in his life but decided not to share it with her ... because it is not important any more or relevant in their relationship. .... What is the consequence of that decision ? .... a) telling her ...WIFEY keeps tab on JOE. what time he goes home, who he is with, etc. etc. On the back of her mind na babalikan niya at any time si Sandy, the GRO. This goes on for the rest of their married life. JOE keeps on saying ... I LOVE YOU and I DO NOT INTEND OF SEEING ANYONE ELSE BUT YOU ... but she keeps on reminding him the past ... not telling her ...JOE does not get bothered by WIFEY. Joe learned his lesson with Sandy. And just kept it in the past and JOE left the past behind him. Wether WIFEY knows or not, it is irrelevant. What is important is that JOE is with WIFEY and intends to spend happy and memorable moments with WIFEY. Quote Link to comment
Angel.Jae Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 i enjoy being single.... alone but free.... :evil: Quote Link to comment
Paquito Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 i enjoy being single.... alone but free.... :evil: free to? care to elaborate more on that??? don't you enjoy being in a serious relationship? you may enjoy being single but would you rather be single when you can have a serious relationship? Quote Link to comment
$weet Baby Posted March 26, 2003 Author Share Posted March 26, 2003 (edited) True, HONESTY is one vital factor in a relationship .... eh di sasabihin ko sa partner ko ... "Honey, i love you soo much. There's one thing you should now ... eh may weakness ako ... Kalibugan ... yung kaibigan mong si X ... may nangyari sa amin, yung kaibigan mong si Y ... at yung nakilala ko si Z may nangyari rin ... di ko naman talaga ginusto basta lang nangyari yan ... hope you learn to forgive me since you love me very much and i love you so much ... sa tutoo lang di naman love yun ... sex lang " naku, honest nga but now i should be expecting sudden changes in our relationship.On the first place let me know the situation first, did it happen before your marriage or after? kasi if it occur now eh ibang usapan yun di ba? but if its past na well you still have to say it definitely your wife would accept it naman kasi its past pero kung present my god you guys never get contented!!!! Your already married then your gonna have pa extra marital affairs di ba? parang its really unfair for us girls. What if kami kaya ang gumawa ng ganun what will the guys feel ? Pasimple im not pertaining to you ha, but for the rest of the guys. We're friends di ba? I just want to express what i feel..... Edited March 27, 2003 by $weet Baby Quote Link to comment
$weet Baby Posted March 26, 2003 Author Share Posted March 26, 2003 (edited) bambina ... sexy_legs ... sweet_baby ... pinag tutulungan ninyo ako. let's talk about scenarios here ... let us say si JOE had an affair with a GRO, named Sandy and had a kid. They both stayed together for two years and had to break up due to the family not accepting her and JOE fell out of love with Sandy. In other words, wala na silang relationship. Then JOE met Wifey. Fell in love and decided to spend the rest of their lives together. But Wait ... JOE has a past. What will he do ? (Step ONe: Put closure on Sandy)Joe talked to sandy and asked her that he wants to severe any ties with her. He asked Sandy to sign a document that i am not the father of the child ... etc... etc..And at the same time, give her a certain amount of financial compensation and at the same time bought a college educational plan for the child. So, a settlement has been reached. Sandy leaves the city and goes back to her province ... and get on with her life ... and the kid ... (Step two: Get Married) (Come forward)Now, Joe decided to come forward ... He told her about the past and what he did about it ... and asked her if WIFEY still accepts her ... she says yes, of course. Love talaga eh. (Not tell her)Now, Joe decided not to tell her ... and they got married. A big chapter in his life but decided not to share it with her ... because it is not important any more or relevant in their relationship. .... What is the consequence of that decision ? .... a) telling her ...WIFEY keeps tab on JOE. what time he goes home, who he is with, etc. etc. On the back of her mind na babalikan niya at any time si Sandy, the GRO. This goes on for the rest of their married life. JOE keeps on saying ... I LOVE YOU and I DO NOT INTEND OF SEEING ANYONE ELSE BUT YOU ... but she keeps on reminding him the past ... not telling her ...JOE does not get bothered by WIFEY. Joe learned his lesson with Sandy. And just kept it in the past and JOE left the past behind him. Wether WIFEY knows or not, it is irrelevant. What is important is that JOE is with WIFEY and intends to spend happy and memorable moments with WIFEY.Well definitely you have a problem on that, pero kasi dapat even before getting married sinabi mo na or totally wala ka ng talagang sasabihin kasi, it will really affect your present relationship kasi after telling her nagbago yung treatment nya to you di ba? so you have to face the consequences of what you have done before. The only thing that you can do right now is just to prove her how much you love your wife para at least magkaroon sya ng feeling ng assurance and security na you won't fool around again.... Edited March 26, 2003 by $weet Baby Quote Link to comment
pasimple Posted March 26, 2003 Share Posted March 26, 2003 Well definitely you have a problem on that, pero kasi dapat even before getting married sinabi mo na or totally wala ka ng talagang sasabihin kasi, it will really affect your present relationship kasi after telling her nagbago yung treatment nya to you di ba? so you have to face the consequences of what you have done before. The only thing that you can do right now is just to prove her how much you love your wife para at least magkaroon sya ng feeling ng assurance and security na you won't fool around again.... eh yan nga ang nangyari ... sinabi sa wifey niya before they got married. eh si wifey ... kahit anong assurance nang guy ... na wala na or wala nang intention ... ayaw pa rin maniwala .. dahil sa tingin nya may lamat na ... puro may duda .... di ba nakaka-asar na yan ... di naman kailangan i-prove eh ... bakit ganyan si wifey ? yan ang point ko ... about being brutally honest na wala sa lugar ... (Peace ha!) Quote Link to comment
pasimple Posted March 26, 2003 Share Posted March 26, 2003 HONESTY is one vital factor in a relationship .... eh di sasabihin ko sa partner ko ... (Pilosopo ba ? he he he he)On the fist place let me know the situation first, did it happen before your marriage or after? kasi if it occur now eh ibang usapan yun di ba? but if its past na well you still have to say it definitely your wife would accept it naman kasi its past pero kung present my god you guys never get contented!!!! Your already married then your gonna have pa extra marital affairs di ba? parang its really unfair for us girls. What if kami kaya ang gumawa ng ganun what will the guys feel ? Pasimple im not pertaining to you ha, but for the rest of the guys. We're friends di ba? I just want to express what i feel..... wether it is before or after the marriage ... i think it is irrelevant. in this case, the guy is just being honest and came forward sa mga pagkakamali nya ... para bang confession sa girl ... o kung ang reaction mo, in-aaccept mo siya before the marriage ... pero kung during marraige (my god you guys never get contented!) ... big issue yun. sabi na nga niya ... sorry at nagkamali siya at di na uulitin ano ... but you still feel hurt ... you felt unfair (he he he ... time to make ganti ... am just a bat signal away .. he he he he he). so, sweet_baby ... so is it better to bury na lang sa past yung past mistakes or pagkakamali di na dapat sasabihin sa partner mo ... para walang gulo ... peace ha! opinion ko lang ito .... Quote Link to comment
bambina Posted March 26, 2003 Share Posted March 26, 2003 hi pasimple i truly understand the need to bury the past. after all, its nothing. done and over with, diba? and what more, it becomes even more scary if you're really scared of losing the potential wifey. then again, even if its in the past, it is part of you. and i don't know for a guy but for a woman, at least me, its important to really know the man i love. i know, its really hard to lose the trust, but with sincere effort it can be regained (i can see the raisde eyebrows but yes, it can) and about burying the past, do you sincerely believe the love your life wifey will never know, ever? i know of a couple, really loves each other, very sweet. 15 yrs into the marriage the wife finds out, the wife thinks, my golly! who was the guy i was with the last 15 yrs?! i never really knew him! sakit diba... now if you want to take the short cut and not go through the whole lot before hand and maybe gamble on the future, that's another story and ofcourse a decision you are free to make. yun lang po Quote Link to comment
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