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Writings of the Heart


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Guest Riveria

When I'm not there... do you think of me? When you're sad and something's bothering you... do you wish I were there to help comfort you? When you've had a long hard day... do you smile knowing that soon you'll be seeing me, and everything will seem better, even if it's just for a moment? When you lay down at night... do you look back and cherish the new memories you've made with me? And when you get up in the morning, does everything inside of you smile, knowing that this will be another day that we'll be together? because that's how I think of you...

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Looking at you now, you are still the same man I married years ago. No one has ever loved me the way you do. For so many times I faltered, you were always there to understand. You've seen me in all cycles of emotions but you still choose to stay. I am so blessed to have you. I may sometimes feel that we're the oddest couple, but your words seem to comfort me all the time. I just can't thank you enough.

 

When the time comes, when you reach your 40s facing another test, you know I won't let you go..... that easy. Hehe :)

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You know what always make me go laughing like crazy? It’s whenever I remember that one late afternoon when you were sitting in the dark upstairs and we were talking about your radio show, a magic wand, and Helen of Sparta and how you were going to cure my pain with your magic.

 

You were laughing hard and I was giggling to death about those stuff which are so disconnected and utterly ridiculous. That’s a priceless afternoon for me. No BS, no drama, just pure juvenile entertainment. I sometimes wonder what happened between then and now. You’re so serious and taray lately that The Joker would pale in comparison if he’s sitting beside you. I know that everything in this world changes even if we don’t want it to and we can't count on stability for any more time than the moment we are in, I still needlessly wonder. People come and go but I was hoping you’ll stay just the same. I missed my old friend. Just thinking out loud. No demands, no expectations. This wouldn't qualify as a love letter, would it?

 

See you in lotus? :P

 

And oh yeah, death to emos. :lol:

Edited by ButtChicKick
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I have fallen in love again...

 

...with the kid I saw at the mall who just passed my by and gave me the sweetest smile to make my day.

...with the puppy I saw at the neighbor's lawn.

...with the kitten that reached out and touched my cheek with its tiny paw.

...with the old man and woman who shared life stories with me while I was eating at their carinderia.

...with the voice of a dear friend who risked so much just to console me.

...with the words of assurance and confidence messaged to me as I am facing my greatest fear.

...with my best friends who are as endearing as ever...loyal and true... with no hidden agenda.

...with the respectful silence people are giving me now, when I don't want to be spoken to or flirted with.

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C

hindi ko alam kung magiiiyak o magagalit na lang sa sarili. na sana hindi ko binukas ang sarili ko sayo. na sana nagtira ako ng kahit kaunting pride na hindi sabihin sayo ang tunay kong nararamdaman. na lagi kitang iniisip. na masaya akong kasama ka. na kahit nagaaway tayo palagi ikaw pa din ang nakakapagpakumpleto ng araw ko.

 

sana hindi ko na hinayaan ang sarili kong magsalita ng totoo. baka sakali hindi mo din ako nagustuhan. baka sakali hindi tayo nagkita ng araw araw. baka hindi mo din naitanong ang pinagkaiba ng gusto sa mahal. at hindi mo ako natutunang mahalin.

 

baka sakali napiligilan ko din ang sarili kong mahalin ka.

 

sabi nila dadating din ang lalake para sayo. pano kung dumating na pero nahuli lang. :)

 

gusto ko ng maging masaya ulit. kahit hindi dahil sayo. kahit hindi dahil sa iba. kahit sa sarili ko lang madiskubre ko ulit na masaya ako na nagiisa.

pero nakikita ko na lang ang sarili kong hinihintay ka. hindi ko alam kung bakit. nahihirapan at nasasaktan ako na nagusap tayo pero nagkakapaan. hindi na katulad ng dati. gusto ko maramdaman mo na nasasaktan ako. halos sabihin ko na dyan ka na lang. nawasak ang puso ko ng sabihin mong naghahanap ka na nga ng paraan para hindi na umalis jan.

 

ang pagibig ko sayo ay totoong totoo. para ko na syang nahahawakan. pag naiisip ko na and2 ka lang sa tabi ko nararamdaman talaga kita. hindi ko alam kung anong hiwaga meron yon. hindi ako pamilyar sa ganitong pakiramdam.

 

hindi ko na din kelangan sabihin. na ang sakit ay ganon din. makakalimutan din kita. alam kong tinutulungan mo akong gawin yon. pero sa ngayon hinahayaan ko pa rin sarili ko na isipin ka. kasi hanggang don lang naman ikaw mapapasaken, bat ko pa pipigilan?

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