Suicidal Lovers

[denimhead]

.. knew a girl once .. she and her bf had a fight while in their car going over a bridge .. he threatened to dump her .. she jumped off the bridge ......her face was messed up ... all bones broken ... died on impact... and her cousins beat the guy up ... now all his bones are broken ... now his frnds want to beat the cousins up and break all their bones...

 

my question.. when will the bone breaking end? im afraid it might end up with me with broken bones

[JoeyAbad]

If you read my post, I never said NOT TO LISTEN.

 

I even said - they (people who proclaim suicidal tendencies)

 

 

 

Sorry, but My statement was a ditto to yours.... "If I may....

[Wyld]

my question.. when will the bone breaking end? im afraid it might end up with me with broken bones

 

...til someone lets it go, the bone breaking wont end.

 

The least you can do is steer clear of the mayhem and watch your back.

 

[UNDergroundX]

in psychology, if a person tells that he/she will commit suicide that simply means, he/she won't.

 

those people just need attention and the feeling that they are still important in this world.

 

so don't believe a person if he/she threatens you..

 

just ask him/her to vent out his/her feelings..

 

in that way, the level of anxiety will alleviate. :thumbsupsmiley:

 

 

 

In reply to your answer with:

'In psychology, if a person tells that he/she will commit suicide that simply means, he/she won't.'

 

I believe that is called falsehood. We should take a look at the big picture first before saying such things.

You already judged a book by its cover and that is a sign of negativity cuz you dont want to know what life is really all about and your mind is closed to new concepts and possibilities. Someone then should update the book of psychology cuz it doesnt really much apply now in our generation.

 

In the past 100 years, we have achieved far greater advancement that made our lives more easier. How do you think we made it? Because we adapted. We refused to give up and stood up at every tests life or what the physical world could throw at us. So adapting is the key to survive here. We need to better understand what we are up against before assessing him or appraising him. This game of life is about survival.

 

Yes, I admit talking to that person to vent his anger / frustration is the first step to get to the bottom of things. But that is just the surface of what we are trying to find out. We are trying to find the cause and not the reason for the person's suicidal tendencies.

 

We have to examine family background, major occurrences of the subject, emotional / love stress levels, level of symptom and talking with the subject + family + friends is the key to putting the puzzles pieces into place. We should not hasten the process since we should put ourselves in the shoes of that person and see what makes him tick. This is a delicate process since the 3rd, 4th and 5th meeting with the subject, you should have already found major pieces and just asking minor questions to finish the puzzle. On the 6th meeting onwards, the story of the subject would change and be exaggerated. That is the usual case but we should still write or jot it down and see if it could fit in the puzzle. By the 6th meeting, you should already know what is wrong with the subject and guide him / her accordingly to how are we going to break the walls and bring him/ her back to the old her. Its a slow process without the full participation of the subject but at least we are moving to that direction which is better than nothing.

 

Always believe what the subject says if she / he has suicidal tendencies. The thing about not believing them and leaving them alone would confirm that nobody cares and they would be more willing to commit suicide. Everyone has a second chance in life and we just dont know it since everybody nowadays think about themselves and that they think nobody would help them when they are in dire need. Another falsehood.

 

Lets take a look at the big picture first. We need you to understand the complexities of living a life with a different background and a different mentality. Dont let your emotions blind you.

 

Like you said:

'Those people just need attention and the feeling that they are still important in this world.' - They are feeling important in the world? More like they are feeling UNIMPORTANT. That is why they are looking for help.

 

Think about it. Think about it.

[iwalkalone]

Uhm...Suicidal Lovers....

There are different types....

People/Partners who keep yacking about...how they'd k*ll themselves if their lover leaves them....but they never really do it...they just say it ...but actually they won't even hurt themselves with a pin or a needle. that's emotional blackmail.

Then there are those types....like Miss Wyld mentioned...those who never anounce it....they just do it.

But then again ....there are those....who say it and at the same time they actually do it....repeatedly...hurting themselves...

 

what do you make of these?

Edited April 10, 2007 by iwalkalone

[UNDergroundX]

Uhm...Suicidal Lovers....

There are different types....

People/Partners who keep yacking about...how they'd k*ll themselves if their lover leaves them....but they never really do it...they just say it ...but actually they won't even hurt themselves with a pin or a needle. that's emotional blackmail.

Then there are those types....like Miss Wyld mentioned...those who never anounce it....they just do it.

But then again ....there are those....who say it and at the same time they actually do it....repeatedly...hurting themselves...

 

what do you make of these?

 

I have replied to the same subject about your question above.

Lets not judge the person agad agad. Let us take in to detail the account on why he/she became that way. Everybody deserves a life that is full of happiness and hope. That is what we all have be rich nor poor. You can never buy that. Inner richness is what matters. Its not about the money you have.

 

Different types. Different objectives. Same agenda - Death to a life that was cold and uncaring. Pangit tingnan diba?

Love thy neighbor and friends din. Everyday we are losing friends due to our uncaring nature. Lets stop the negativity here.

For some reasons, we stopped learning about the world around us. Is this what we want the human race to end in?

[UNDergroundX]

I am married and separated in room.. he built another house at the other end of a very big house..He's a rich guy..My husband is very rich.. that's why he's so controlling and matured than me.. I am a legal wife.. and I don't know if he has other women..Wala na ako pakialam..But I won't tell you if he's the main reason for my pseudobipolar.,.May Obssessive compulsive husband ko..napaka perfectionist grabe!..Kaya kami nag kahiwalay.. It's his nature na he can't stay with a woman.. he has past live-in partners before.. na di nag work out nasa kanya ang diprensya.. inamin nya..Obssessive..perfectionist cya.. and very abusive..mentally abusive.. grabe mag control sa mind..I was a dependent housewife of a richman before.. now i started to stand on my own feet.. i have a good job ..But i still live in the same big house and dahil sa laki ng house di na kami nagkikita.. really i'm telling you the real story here..I won't tell you if he's the reason for all of my pseudo bipolar..But Mayu nagyari na another impact sa buhay ko lately..dun nag start..and sorry.. i won't disclose it here ..And yes, i think I love that way..sa past BF ko..wala naman masyado.. of course i feel bad if mag hiwalay kami before sa mga past bf ko..but okey lang yun, di ako nakafeel ng sobra na ganito,.,...parang goin crazy talaga.. i am overwhelmed now..with all of these impacts of my life..

I do feel so depress and i think it's normal to be depressed everytime mag break tayo sa BF natin ..right... but now is really different.. kasi siguro.. sa pressure ng age ko.. i'm 30 and i must have a kid at this age.. and i must have a family and a life partner..Di ako papayag talaga na wala yan..Di pwede..I need that to sustain me..I can't live living alone..no way!

 

P.S. I am legally married and contemplating for a legal sep. or annulment.. but di na materialize di pa talaga, takot or coldfeet pa kami both sa annulment..But I think di ko na kaya ..i think i must ..para makahanap na ako ng partner,... I hate loneliness.. i can't bear it..It's killing me.

 

All I see is I want I want I want in your answers. That is bad. You have lived a sheltered life truly and now its time for you to face the real world. I guess that the psych didnt tell you this since you are paying his / her services. All they say to you are good things to prevent you from getting another psych. Sometimes it is typical for the psych to drag you to tons of sessions and its all about.. How are you? how was your week? how are you feeling? any new updates in life? What are we paying them for again in the first place?

 

You have got to change your mindset. We are living in a harsh world now. If you dont do anything at this point in life, then you will be a leech forever. No one wants to die old doing nothing and not reaching for their dreams. If there is a chance at a second life that is full of happiness, then tomorrows news today! Do something today. I dont want to see you old and still feeling depressed at what could you have done when you were young and all.. that is whining.

 

Stop depressing yourself. If you dont want to look for a bf, then find a friend or a best friend! That is what you need at this time, you need someone to talk to, a listening ear when you are done and depressed. That is what we are here for to support you in your struggle to finding a happier life. Finding the one is just around the corner if you moved your ass now. You think the one will fall right out of a tree? Please look at yourself in the mirror. You are beautiful in every aspect you just dont know it since you are looking the other way. Your former husband loved you for a reason. Use that to your advantage. Find your rhythm again.

 

Lets start first by arranging your life: (It might not apply but here is the basic list on how to move on.)

Take note that it is your prerogative whether to say yes or no to it but this might help you.

 

1. Find a job that would move you to another path. Everyone loves a successful business woman. Your former hubby is a perfectionist? Well I guess you have not yet understood how hard it is to conduct business and what he wants you to do is to be a better wife that is why he is telling you to do this and that. You might not know it but he wants you to be on equal footing to him so that he could be proud of his wife. Try working and understand how hard it is to be in his shoes.

 

2. Talk to your family and friends. When was the last time you had a heart to heart talk with your family? They are your last line of defense in this cruel and cold world. They are there in times of need. Talk to them and tell them how you feel. Being misunderstood all your life is not good. Change their perception of you. Even if you burned the bridge with them, you might as well start building their trust again and build a better, stronger bridge. They wont shoo you away, trust me. They are your family. Talk to your old friends. Catch up. It doesnt hurt to talk to them and ask them on how they are now and how they found happiness. You might develop a bond again with them since they will notice on how you cared and remembered them through the years. Wont hurt to take the first step right? When your in the bottom pit, all you can do is go up. No other way but up.

 

3. Move On. You want to move on? Tell it to yourself first and agree with that idea whole heartedly. Follow step one and two. Build your foundations first. Then its time for you to move on. Your ex-hubby will see that you still have values and know how to move on. There are tons of fish in the sea. He has tons of live-ins before? Then good luck to him. Dont pity him, his destruction is his own doing. We are all judged equally by God remember that. Get a stable job, keep for the rainy days, splurg on good investments like real estates and move there. Move out. Moving out of his place is a major leap if you have already bought your own place or better yet, move back to your family home. Seeing your hubby every single day brings you to a state of depression. That is what I dont want to see in you. You must have the heart to move on. So what if he is rich? Do you think he will support you till the day that he dies? Reality snaps back at you. Dont grow old with negativity. Again, so what if he is rich? You can be rich to with hardwork and the sense of belonging. No one can take that away from you.

 

Once you moved on, if your ex-hubby looks at you. It will be in a different life na. At this point, just smile at him, it will confuse him. After that, you can finally say that you have fully moved on. In a few years time after your successful, always refer to this post and find encouragement. I might not be here anymore but at least my words are still here to guide you every step of the way.

 

Sorry to be straight and true but all I want to see is a happier you. Its better if I said it straight here rather than hearing it from someone else who doesnt understand and comprehend a piece of your endless beauty. As they say, in the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.

 

Coldfeet parin siya sa separation? Then he cant move on. You have the chance.

Does he still love you? Yan iyong tanong. Binastos ka na nga niya by looking for another love.

If he is chinese, then he should value his honor rather than earthly temptations.

Everyone deserves to be loved.. why cant you?

Everything was black... cuz your eyes wer closed.

 

I dedicate this song to you by Nina: Someday. Listen to it. It might help you move on and look at life in a different perspective.

 

t help you move on and look at life in a different perspective.

Edited April 10, 2007 by UNDergroundX

[iwalkalone]

All I see is I want I want I want in your answers. That is bad. You have lived a sheltered life truly and now its time for you to face the real world. I guess that the psych didnt tell you this since you are paying his / her services. All they say to you are good things to prevent you from getting another psych. Sometimes it is typical for the psych to drag you to tons of sessions and its all about.. How are you? how was your week? how are you feeling? any new updates in life? What are we paying them for again in the first place?

 

You have got to change your mindset. We are living in a harsh world now. If you dont do anything at this point in life, then you will be a leech forever. No one wants to die old doing nothing and not reaching for their dreams. If there is a chance at a second life that is full of happiness, then tomorrows news today! Do something today. I dont want to see you old and still feeling depressed at what could you have done when you were young and all.. that is whining.

 

Stop depressing yourself. If you dont want to look for a bf, then find a friend or a best friend! That is what you need at this time, you need someone to talk to, a listening ear when you are done and depressed. That is what we are here for to support you in your struggle to finding a happier life. Finding the one is just around the corner if you moved your ass now. You think the one will fall right out of a tree? Please look at yourself in the mirror. You are beautiful in every aspect you just dont know it since you are looking the other way. Your former husband loved you for a reason. Use that to your advantage. Find your rhythm again.

 

Lets start first by arranging your life: (It might not apply but here is the basic list on how to move on.)

Take note that it is your prerogative whether to say yes or no to it but this might help you.

 

1. Find a job that would move you to another path. Everyone loves a successful business woman. Your former hubby is a perfectionist? Well I guess you have not yet understood how hard it is to conduct business and what he wants you to do is to be a better wife that is why he is telling you to do this and that. You might not know it but he wants you to be on equal footing to him so that he could be proud of his wife. Try working and understand how hard it is to be in his shoes.

 

2. Talk to your family and friends. When was the last time you had a heart to heart talk with your family? They are your last line of defense in this cruel and cold world. They are there in times of need. Talk to them and tell them how you feel. Being misunderstood all your life is not good. Change their perception of you. Even if you burned the bridge with them, you might as well start building their trust again and build a better, stronger bridge. They wont shoo you away, trust me. They are your family. Talk to your old friends. Catch up. It doesnt hurt to talk to them and ask them on how they are now and how they found happiness. You might develop a bond again with them since they will notice on how you cared and remembered them through the years. Wont hurt to take the first step right? When your in the bottom pit, all you can do is go up. No other way but up.

 

3. Move On. You want to move on? Tell it to yourself first and agree with that idea whole heartedly. Follow step one and two. Build your foundations first. Then its time for you to move on. Your ex-hubby will see that you still have values and know how to move on. There are tons of fish in the sea. He has tons of live-ins before? Then good luck to him. Dont pity him, his destruction is his own doing. We are all judged equally by God remember that. Get a stable job, keep for the rainy days, splurg on good investments like real estates and move there. Move out. Moving out of his place is a major leap if you have already bought your own place or better yet, move back to your family home. Seeing your hubby every single day brings you to a state of depression. That is what I dont want to see in you. You must have the heart to move on. So what if he is rich? Do you think he will support you till the day that he dies? Reality snaps back at you. Dont grow old with negativity. Again, so what if he is rich? You can be rich to with hardwork and the sense of belonging. No one can take that away from you.

 

Once you moved on, if your ex-hubby looks at you. It will be in a different life na. At this point, just smile at him, it will confuse him. After that, you can finally say that you have fully moved on. In a few years time after your successful, always refer to this post and find encouragement. I might not be here anymore but at least my words are still here to guide you every step of the way.

 

Sorry to be straight and true but all I want to see is a happier you. Its better if I said it straight here rather than hearing it from someone else who doesnt understand and comprehend a piece of your endless beauty. As they say, in the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.

 

Coldfeet parin siya sa separation? Then he cant move on. You have the chance.

Does he still love you? Yan iyong tanong. Binastos ka na nga niya by looking for another love.

If he is chinese, then he should value his honor rather than earthly temptations.

Everyone deserves to be loved.. why cant you?

Everything was black... cuz your eyes wer closed.

 

I dedicate this song to you by Nina: Someday. Listen to it. It might help you move on and look at life in a different perspective.

 

t help you move on and look at life in a different perspective.

 

 

comment lang po ako according sa nabasa ko kay Sweetania....if i'm not mistaken...she ha s ajob...a good job actually...

ang nakikita ko lang pong problem ay...kung bat nya hinahayaang ganunin sya ng asawa nya...considering na mag asawa pari naman sila....

nangyari po kase ito sa Mom ko....sakto....pero sila may mga anak na noon tatlo....babaero yung asawa nya at napakayaman....kasal sila....hanggang sa...nagmatigas narin sya pero dun parin sya nakatira sa "mansion" nung magulang nung asawa nya ( yup di sila humiwalay sa parents nung lalake)...at alam nya lahat ng kalokohan ng asawa nya...pero andun parin sya at di sila nag papa annul or legal separation man lang.....things became only worse for her....it drove her almost nuts...and yes she ctried commiting suicide twice....una uminom ng sleeping pills....binutas lalamunan nya...she survived...when she woke up in the hospital tumalon agad sya sa bintana...nasalo naman sya ng...concrete extension ng bintana ata nung susunod na floor...unconcious kaya naligtas pa...

Edited April 10, 2007 by iwalkalone

[tabouki]

ideally, in cases like these, its best to seek professional help. but not all jilted suicidal lovers can afford to. meron din naman hotlines that they can call to seek help. ok din ang ganitong forum para kumuha ng inputs from well-meaning people & professionals. very informative and educational.

 

i am not a psychiatrist nor do i pretend to be one. just like the others, i post my opinions, based on my experiences and what i know about the topic. mahirap magmarunong, delikado yan, baka sundiin nung makabasa at makasama pa.

[Larry]

Lets start first by arranging your life: (It might not apply but here is the basic list on how to move on.)

 

i don't know but, everyone has their own ways of moving on, you really can't give a step by step for that.

 

I dedicate this song to you by Nina: Someday.

 

sorry another OT, but this song is just bad. It reeks of misery, bitterness and desperation. You can move on without thinking of the person that caused you pain, he/she doesn't have to always be at the back of your mind.

 

Live for yourself and nobody else. Be happy, because no one can be happy for you.

 

 

Sometimes all it takes for someone suicidal to change his/her mind is for someone to listen. Suicidal tendencies are cries for help. When the depressions gets so bad that all you want to do is end it, these people just look around for other people to be there for them and tell them that it will pass.

 

Suicide is an ugly ugly word. It's something I will never understand nor I think I will ever attempt. But I've seen people close to it, and it's not pretty.

[UNDergroundX]

ideally, in cases like these, its best to seek professional help. but not all jilted suicidal lovers can afford to. meron din naman hotlines that they can call to seek help. ok din ang ganitong forum para kumuha ng inputs from well-meaning people & professionals. very informative and educational.

 

i am not a psychiatrist nor do i pretend to be one. just like the others, i post my opinions, based on my experiences and what i know about the topic. mahirap magmarunong, delikado yan, baka sundiin nung makabasa at makasama pa.

 

Reality check. We are in the Philippines. Everyone is here for profit. Suicide hotlines? Do you think that those hotlines will help us and do those even work? Seriously that is like hitting a brick wall. If the customer service of other countries is being outsourced to other countries, ano naman kaya kung suicidal american ka tapos ang sumagot sa hotline eh.. Indian?

 

I will feel more suicidal that way. Its just a joke pero thats the reality now in our greedy world.

 

Yes, they should seek professional help. But what if that professional help is only here for the profit as well and is dragging on your sessions para maka make siya ng profit?

 

Lets not think about it but I strictly suggest people looking for a real psych to double check and look for the credentials.

Hope that helps.

[Wyld]

Ang daming OT.

 

Ang topic... Suicidal Lovers.

 

Back to topic.

[iwalkalone]

we really think you should move out....para di ka na matorture....best revenge po tingin ko...pakita mo sa kanyang di mo sya kailangan.....pero kung di mo naman kaya gawin....makipag ayos ka na po sa kanya for your own well being ..... be a really good wife... palagay ko naman po nagpakasal kayo kase "onCE" nagmahalan din naman kayo...and you were both good to each other...baka naman pwede pa i save ang marriage nyo? [/b]

[D. Sanchez]

I've seen that happen. She took a Gillete disposable razor blade and slashed her left wrist. It almost killed my ex-gf bcoz of an heated argument with her mom and her other personal problems he can't take.

 

Doc said It is PTSD or Post traumatic stress disorder wherein you've too many violent episode in anybody's lifetime.

[equipped]

It happened to me several times! ewan ko ba bakit lagi akong nakakatagpo ng ganyang babae! my naglaslas, ung isa pa nga uminom ng Clorox! Im not saying that im good looking pero it really happen! My friends keep on asking me kung ano ang sikreto bakit nangyayari yun. Sabi ko because of sex di pa sila sawa sa akin! hehehehe! pero nakakakunsensiya buti nalang wala pang natuluyan! nakakahiya baka ma TV patrol or Saksi!!!!!