A Complicated Relationship

[BnF95]

A relationship is simple, two people who want to spend time together. Its all the other things that make it complicated. (i.e. work, husband/wife, other guys/girs, friends, parents and siblings, barkada). On the other hand, for some strange reason, people still keep trying to 'fix' a relationship that's already over ... if it's dead, give it a decent burial and move on.

[mariejoy]

i think the girl is not that into you. confused pa sya sa feelings nya sayo at sa ex nya. kahit sobra ang pagmamahal mo sa kanya, dapat mag give way ka. give her enough space para makapag isip. at ikaw naman, try to weigh things. mag focus k sa ibang bagay o sa ibang babae. you can still find someone meant for you. mahirap din kasi mag adjust sometimes pag malaki ang age gap nyo. na experience ko na yan before. sometimes kahit ginawa mo ng lahat to make her happy, kung meron pa ibang guy na nagpapagulo ng isip nya, mahihirapan ka lang. don't let your heart suffer. ndi lang naman sya yung last na girl na pede mong mahalin. kung mas mahal nya yung ex nya. just let her go. love will find a way kung kayo ang para sa isat isadi ba? it doesn't matter kung saan mo sya na meet. dami naman successful relationship na nag start sa internet.

 

i don't think na parents nya yung reason, its just that shes not yet over with her ex...

[ZariHemi]

people here are already spoken brad as what i observed in you, your pretty in love with the this girl and that love makes u blind and u cant see anymore it makes u dumb brad all i can see in your relationship is that if you still continue this it will make u lost in the field of holograms, worst ito pa ang dahilan ng ikasisira mo even death... your just wasting ur time and money ... get back to yourself again and find someone new... bring back ur pride as a man not as a puppet.

 

My BeDrOoM Is My FiEf AnD Im ThE MaStEr Of AlL My SuRVeY

[thrillseeker]

This situation is really easy to be concluded and be advised. hindi kasi tayo ang nasa situation nya. But as I can say, most people on the Internet take these kind of scenario to take advantage of the present situation. Some are trying to loosen up since they are having a bad day. Excuses are easier to make since we can never make track of what they're doing. I see that you have a huge feelings for this gal. Although, she never gets to give the favor back. A relationship is a two way street, how the hell can you say that there will be a relation if one is going on circles?

 

Let us be real for one time and try to think that you're trying to perform as a man in love with a young lady. But is she doing her part? Or just like what you said, is she just trying to escape what the real deal is? As I reaD on how the story ended, you were a scapegoat that whenever there was a fight between the two of them, you were her shoulder to cry on.

 

If there is a way there is a will. Parang tayong mga lalake lang naman yan eh. If we do not like the girl, we've got lots of reasons, tons of them. But if we do like them, there is not a word nor definition of impossibility to get the littlest attention that one can give.

 

The only lesson learned here is to never be in love with a student. They're all players, love is not an issue for them. They can break your heart and leave you with broken pieces, mahirap magmahal. Once they see a pretty face, they'll surely turn into them.

[Guest lene]

umm, people, I believe wildswans already said he broke up with the girl last december. ( sorry friend ha, i hope you don't mind me speaking up for you ) so , although the discussion could probably be appreciated by other people in similar situations, its up to the mods to decide if they should close this thread

[simpleme]

When love is not around...

if one of you is cheating na..

[wildswans]

umm, people, I believe wildswans already said he broke up with the girl last december. ( sorry friend ha, i hope you don't mind me speaking up for you ) so , although the discussion could probably be appreciated by other people in similar situations, its up to the mods to decide if they should close this thread

 

thanks for the heads up, lene...

 

yeah..we broke up last december 2006..but the pain haven't completely fade away after all this time. i'm getting there though as i feel i'm about 75% over her already. for some of you, it may be a case of her not getting over her ex yet as that what she led me to believe but looking back, there are instances and proof that she actually 2 timed her bf for me or other guys for that matter perhaps she's a player. btw, she and her supposed "ex" celebrated their 4th year anniv last month. anyway, i'm trying to put this matter behind me and looking forward to a brand new start. i'll just charge this to experience. thanks again to all those who gave me their insights especially to lene..thank you so much!

[mark_pogi]

age gap shouldnt be the issue.

[DonImus]

By complicated you mean one doesn't want to completely commit? Then that only means one of you is really not into the other...

[poppinfresh2k5]

screw it. everything is complicated. have fun. just be ready to face whatever consequences. tralala.

[blueSabine]

In a complicated relationship, you both gotta talk the talk...if one doesn't want to--let go...move forward coz that's the only way to go...

[kentx5494]

I have a something to share guys hope u could lend me some of you're time and see my

 

situataion and hope u could advice me whether or not to go on with what Im having

 

right now..

 

I have a girlfriend for over a year now.. where about to celebrate our 2nd anniversary

 

this october supposedly... but something has been goin wrong between the two of us..

 

its just that our relationships not the same anymore.. its more on her side thats the

 

problem she's just so difficult to understand even before our relationship started i saw

 

this in her. yung tinatawag ba na ang hirap espilengin! more on her attitude.. i tried and

 

gave her all the time in the world hoping one day she'll mature and stop acting childish

 

but still nothing happend.. shes still the same stubborn brat I knew.. We'd even fight

 

over non sense issues such as a platefull of spaghetti, a ballpen, trash can, Mop, etc!

 

There was also a time she didnt only did it once but thrice already slashing her wrist out

 

of no good reason at all!! not even because I had someone else or me having my friends

 

to go out on gimiks.. I remained faithfull to her all these years!! Even gave up my

 

career and instead joined her in her inherrited business and even fought my parents

 

bout it!

 

much to my hearts content her family is a different story.. they all loved me and even

 

chooses me over her in one way or another whenever she's throwing tantrums that is.

 

her mom being a well known businesswoman even gave us a business of our own to

 

manage and she even has plans of bringing us to the U.S so we could have our lives

 

there and get married. i just coulnt explain anymore what to feel or say regarding her

 

families treatment to me.. although the major problem here is my girl friend herself

 

so i found myself again just trying to understand her whenever where fighting bout non

 

sense issues.. and one faithfull day I found this girl who's exactly the opposite of my

 

girlfriend! cheerful, mature way of thinking, simple and easily gets contented. I know no

 

ones perfect even this girl has some faults but its definitely much more tolerable than

 

the other. damn what should i do??

 

Im falling in love with this girl... Although I cant just let her(My GF) know whats the real

 

score between the two of us.. coz I just dont know what she might do in the end.

 

that's whats scarin the s@#t out of me whenever I'd think of breakin her out of the

 

blue.

 

guys what do u think?? what would be the best possible thing to do with my current GF

 

that would settle the score between the two of us and at the sametime she wont

 

resolve on such drastic horrifying measures??

 

Thanks a lot guys!!!

[LawKo]

 

Find a new partner...

[Tank Girl]

Chinese men are doomed in damnation for this kind of ancient ritual. Sorry that was just my alter ego talking but seriously i would suggest that you find another girlfriend. Having someone in your life should be a great joy than a burden, why keep up with that crap? you deserve better, you are an intelligent and succesful man and you have no time for women who drags you down. Go for mature and independent women. Beauty is relative. You can never change people. As much as you love her, why would you keep on analyzing on such trivial things??? maybe all this time the righjt person is just right under your nose..Explore! and Dont' commit, love will come gradually

Edited October 15, 2007 by Tank Girl

[shrike]

have you read Taming of the Shrew by William Shithead. ?

 

It seems that you have it all going fairytale - good family, good bloodline, the works and you're bitching about the bratty att of your GF, what are you a spineless fool? Good women are made by good men, if you do not fit into the category of good men then any women you'll find fault when things aren't goin your way. But if you know how to jive and mold your partner into the lady she should become then youre in luck. Stars are shining on you coz her family dotes on you, others have less but succeeded.

 

Quit this good cop, bad cop relationship blues. Any bloke worth his salt won't quit by her ladies bitching, any fool would pick a 'better' att girl but allow me to burst your bubble, any dick can also waylay your newfound chickababe, trust me. Do with what have you have, create order in chaos, that's why you were born a man ... not the other way around.

 

IMHO she's controlling you because you're a weak att person, the fact that you don't know how to force the issue on her is a valid point. Tell her how, what and why and if you really mean it, she'll follow you. Show her who wears pants in the house. Dominating brats just need a show of authority and if she doesn't see you as such she'll play you around lika play-doh. Ever tried carinyo brutal or any kinda jedi mind tricks ?

 

Just being the devil that I am ... Ima advocating for a good cause .

[coolbreeze]

kausapin mo ng seryoso... yung totoong pag uusap... siguro naman mapi feel mo kung totoo yung sinasabi nya or not... if not then let go... masakit to do that kung mahal mo na sya, pero it's better that way kesa masaktan ka ng paulit ulit. mahalin mo muna ang sarili mo. makakahanap ka pa... don't forget to pray.

[TheIceMan]

i'm curious, why do most of you think that it's about her not getting over her ex yet and not about her parents being strict?

 

i admit that i really love this girl so i don't want to break up with her on the wrong reasons. i'm afraid she might just use firmly the reason that her parents are strict and i'm not an understanding BF, can that be the case here?

 

all i have is her secret friendster account with a primary pic of her ex's arms around her and dated during our 1st month. i'm afraid she might just use the reason that she uses that pic to divert attention from our current relationship so her parent or sis won't know. she can also argue that the date she puts there is only a caption which she can change to any date she wants and is just use to also divert attention. is that scenario possible or am i just going crazy now?

 

ma-pride kasi gf ko and very smart, since ako na nga yung hindi niya love, ayaw ko naman makipag break or magbreak kami na ako may kasalanan.

 

 

Wow... what an interesting love story... either a hopeless romantic or hopelessly devoted. A real person with a pure heart.

 

But dude, you realyy need to wake up, having such strict parents should not hinder one person's pursuit of true love. (Remember Romeo and Juliet?) Anyway, it has been a while since you last visited your room, I wonder if how did it went? Did you finally broke up with her or the other way around?

 

Anyway, I wish you well and hope to get an update on your story... :thumbsupsmiley:

Edited November 26, 2007 by TheIceMan

[largebelly]

Now I've got a situation also. I met this foreign classmate (asian country) who I fell in love with. I'm still married but planning on separating. I'm currently trying to make sure my wife and kids will have a more secure future before I go. She is sent here by the church to study and shall leave by mid next year. I have no intention at all in loving anyone, I hate the complexities brought about by the feeling, but obviously I failed.

 

I have expressed my feelings to her and she also has reciprocated her feelings. But it ends there. We are in limbo on where to go. She doesn't want her peers to know and I don't push. Pretty soon she'll be leaving. She can't promise to return back.

 

I'm not sure what I want, although I want her back, any ideas. Even harebrained ones are welcomed.

[karen26]

maybe she is confused and really fickle minded person, maybe din ikaw lang makakaramdam ng totoong sya coz lagi mo syang nakakasama. marami pa din siguro syang gustong gawin sa buhay nya na naisip nyang once naging serious sya sayo maraming mababago. the way u talk hindi ka naman ganun ka-strict but once u are into a serious relationship dapat mabawasan na yung mga mysteries sa buhay nya, she should be honest enough to tell you everything especially when it comes to the "ex", tingnan mo din sya kung di pa ba sya naka-move-on talaga, pakiramdaman mo. if she still talks about him that often then maybe it's time to distance yourself muna for her to think what she really wanted in life, if it's you that she chooses then walang lihiman dapat. tell her to stop dwelling in the past, kung reletionship ang gusto nya dapat yung mga nakaraan nya magstart na syang kalimutan and harapin nya ang bago nyang buhay with you. about the chat thing, ok lang to chat with friends....basta lang importante alam mo...... dapat din hindi na nya kinakausap yung ex nya, unfair yun sayo, hindi naman talaga maganda yung ikaw ang huling makakaalam na nagkakausap pa pala sila, nakakawala ng trust yun at yun ang pinakaimportante sa relationship. saludo ako sayo, ang bait mo, akala ko wala ng lalaking katulad mo na emotionally involved ka talaga sa pakikipagrelasyon.... i can feel na mahal mo talaga sya, sana lang masuklian ang pagmamahal na yun before it's gna be too late for u. leave everything to god and hold on to chance, chance na maging sayo na talaga sya ng buong buo at walang bahid na pagsisinungaling na samahan.... goodluck & let us know if you guys did fix it!!!!

[wynona_20fqc]

hay naku..naloka ko sa haba ng binasa ko!!hehehe..its like a roller coaster kind of relationship..kung ako tatanungin tama na yung paulit-ulit mo xang iniintindi..nakakaumay na ata..hrap namang magising ka isang araw na wala k ng maramdaman sa kanya xe manhid kana..ang hirap ata nun.bout ur concerns,ok lng yun na snabi mo atleast open ka sa kanya kaso pinatagal mo nmn,,kung ano n yung nararamdman mo dapat lagi mong snasbi para alam nyang anjang kang bf nya na nasasaktan nya..hay naku..swerte nga nya cyo eh..yun lng! :hypocritesmiley:

[wynona_20fqc]

hay naku..naloka ko sa haba ng binasa ko!!hehehe..its like a roller coaster kind of relationship..kung ako tatanungin tama na yung paulit-ulit mo xang iniintindi..nakakaumay na ata..hrap namang magising ka isang araw na wala k ng maramdaman sa kanya xe manhid kana..ang hirap ata nun.bout ur concerns,ok lng yun na snabi mo atleast open ka sa kanya kaso pinatagal mo nmn,,kung ano n yung nararamdman mo dapat lagi mong snasbi para alam nyang anjang kang bf nya na nasasaktan nya..hay naku..swerte nga nya cyo eh..yun lng! :hypocritesmiley:

[bc917]

do both of yourselves a favor. get out while you can. relationships can be complicated but it should not be that complicated

[DonImus]

Gusto ka lang nya for sex (for the girls) or kulang ang pag-ibig nya for you (for the boys).

Edited December 1, 2007 by DonImus

[mossad]

Now I've got a situation also. I met this foreign classmate (asian country) who I fell in love with. I'm still married but planning on separating. I'm currently trying to make sure my wife and kids will have a more secure future before I go. She is sent here by the church to study and shall leave by mid next year. I have no intention at all in loving anyone, I hate the complexities brought about by the feeling, but obviously I failed.

 

I have expressed my feelings to her and she also has reciprocated her feelings. But it ends there. We are in limbo on where to go. She doesn't want her peers to know and I don't push. Pretty soon she'll be leaving. She can't promise to return back.

 

I'm not sure what I want, although I want her back, any ideas. Even harebrained ones are welcomed.

 

 

you're just inviting yourself into a complicated situation. you're already married and have kids. just let it go. i don't think it's love but lust that you're feeling for your foreign classmate.

Edited December 2, 2007 by mossad

[tisoybrown]

dude,forget it.find someone else.remember not to play the cards that others draw.you should have the others play the cards you draw.this chic is obviously in love with the other guy,and is just trying to keep you for the other option.that strict parents thing is bull****,unless proven.wke up bro,ive been there,but i never had it go for a month.thats ridiculous.u should know when to leave,and leave for good.and dont forget about the break-up sex...just to keep your ego close. :headsetsmiley: