cynophile

Ginagawang retirement yung plan ang anak. That “ETONG BATANG TO ANG MAG AAHON SA AMIN SA HIRAP” Is really cringing!!!!! 🙄

Miss ko na magclient, magmassage, mag offer ng 😭 hahahha

I'm at solaire now alone, my first time maglaro here. Sa COD palang yung na try ko and sa ilang beses na naglaro ako doon never ako binagsakan ng kahit 1k man lang ng mga machine nila😂 (im not a big time player,mga more than 5k but less than 10k lang budget ko sa ganito pamatay oras) Pero here sa solaire, 2k palang yung nilabas ko in a span of 2-3hrs. Pabalik balik sya hahahaha. Atleast naranasan ko na manalo ng 2500 😂 hahaa share ko lang.

Before dating someone, alamin mo muna kung single talaga sya o galit lang siya sa asawa. 🫣

I’m not offended naman, and I know you’re not gonna hate me kasi kahit mag end up ako alone, di naman ako magsisisi. Mas naiisip ko pa nga kung paano na ko magsasalita mag isa sa bahay pag may kasama na ko😭 kidding hahaha. Pero ayun, since I’ve been living alone for 2yrs na, sanay na alone haha. Pero if may dadating, willing mag adjust. Pero kung wala, oks lang din. Buo naman ako ng ako lang.

I know what I bring to the table so I’m not afraid to eat alone. I can provide what I require, I can afford what I demand. But, wala rin naman masama if maging single/alone ako for the rest of my life. Huhue I’m not familiar to all the traits para masabing SMV is high, basta bata ako (early 20s) hindi ako panget at I’m earning good enough. I know my worth. I’ll never let myself in a competition with another girl for a man. If he let’s another woman feel like she has a chance with him edi magsama sila. If anyone can have it, i dont need it.

he paid for my rhinoplasty worth 90k. gave me an iphone 13 pro max and nintendo switch. (he's an ex na 2yrs ago) do you know the feeling when you can actually afford it but it hits differently when someone pays for it. 😍 haaaays.

I worked so hard to spoil myself so I will never settle for a man who would tell me , "we cant travel, its too expensive." , "we cant buy this , lets be practical.". Habibi, I CAN BUT YOU CAN'T 😝

Di ako nakapagbreakdown kaninang madaling araw kasi busy ako hndi kaya ng schedule 😭😭😭 ganto pala maging adult hays haha

Whenever I feel like nobody's proud of me, I always imagine the inner child in me clapping and telling me how proud she is that I have made it this far. (Malayo pa pero malayo na)

Ngayon ko lang napagtanto na walang nakakaalam ng paborito kong pagkain o ng paborito kong kulay, ng paborito kong kanta. Walang nakapagsasabing ito ang pangarap kong puntahan, o ito ang tipo ng librong gusto kong basahin. Wala. Walang nakakaalala na ito ang paborito kong pelikula. Ngayon ko lang napagtantong wala ni isang ginusto akong kilalanin. Walang nagtangkang kabisaduhin kahit ang pinakasimpleng bagay tungkol sa akin.

What camera marerecommend nyo for a solo traveller? I’m eyeing to DJI OSMO POCKET 3 and SONY ZV-E10. Pero kung di papalarin since pricey yan pareho, baka mag stick nalang ako with my phone (iphone13pro max) then buy nalang ng tripod gimbal if familiar kayo sa tripod na yan. Mahilig ako magtake ng videos and photo of myself e, yung mga candid shots. Mga kunware emote emote naglalakad 😂 problema ko lang, wala naman akong kasama palagi so paano ako susundan ng camera ko maglakad o tumakbo sa beach.😂 (tripod gimbal ay may 360 rotation na nacocontrol sa remote) so anong camera po yung pwede recommended for my needs?

Ask ko lang po, pwede po ba ako kasuhan ng mom ko kung feeling nya kulang yung financial support ko sa kanila? Na-watched ko kasi sa tiktok, may lawyer na nag explain kaso hndi ko na mahanap yung vid. Hiwalay yung parents ko. 2nd ako sa magkakapatid, pero PWD yung kuya ko so technically parang ako talaga yung aasahan. Then may dalawa akong kapatid, isang 6yrs old and 12yrs old. Ever since naghiwalay yung parents ko 2500 per month lang talaga yung bnbigay ni papa since wala naman syang trabaho at umaasa lang sya sa kabit nya. (Married parin sila ni mama) So regarding sa support na binibigay ko, ako ang nagbabayad ng electricity and wifi nila. Plus nagbibigay ako ng 10k every 15 and 30. Total of 20k a month. (Pero nahahati yun since yung dalawang bata kong kapatid ay doon nakatira sa lola ko, katabing bahay lang naman ni mama). Hinihiram ko rin yung mga kapatid ko atleast 1-2x a month para ipasyal. (Nakabukod na po ako, single pero preferred to live alone) Nagbibigay din ako ng mga requests nila like gadgets, bagong shoes, damit, etc. Ako rin bumibili ng vitamins at mga gamot, and nagbibigay ako ng extra pag may medical needs sila. (Kahit sobrang ungrateful ni mama) So here’s the thing, si mama is only 42yrs old nung naghiwalay sila. She is 45 now, and malakas pa naman sya. maraming times ako nagbigay ng money pang business para sana hndi lahat iaasa nya sakin, kaso lagi nyang pinapabayaan pag tinamad na sya. So ngayon, everytime na ubos na yung pera na bnigay ko kung ano anong ginagawa nya. Pinapa barangay ako, pinopost ako sa fb na wala akong kwentang anak, na kinakawawa ko daw sya kahit di naman kami nag uusap. (Hindi ko na sya kinakausap kasi ungrateful at puro sya reklamo, yung bills direct naman sa email ko and yung pera pinsan ko yung nag aabot sa kanila.) Tapos yung mga kumare nya nakikicomment sa fb pa na pwede daw ako kasuhan abandonment ek ek 😅 yung iba naman dapat daw akong ireklamo kay tulfo 😂 Then I remembered the tiktok video about don sa 1st degree descendants and 1st degree ascendants ang pwede maging responsible. (Pls correct me if im wrong) Siguro nga maliit yung 20k lalo’t may mga kapatid ako. Pero I have my own life too. My own expenses, own bills to pay, sariling needs at wants na deserve ko naman kasi pinaghihirapan ko. I’m just tired na kasi na para akong bnblockmail palagi. At nakakahiya na rin. Sobra. Responsibilidad ko po ba to lahat at pwede akong makulong kung di ako magdadagdag or tamarin na rin ako magbigay?

Yung interview ni Salome Salvi sa Toni Talks This is another episode from Toni Talks that brought out my childhood trauma again. Whenever people ask me if I want to have kids, I always straight up say “NO” pero karamihan talaga sa mga baby boomers ‘di nila magets why. Salome Salvi explained it very well, ‘yung sinabi niya rito reflects me 1000% “Yeah, I learned eventually na parang hindi ko na maasahan ‘yung magulang ko to be the parents that I deserve as a child. It’s now up to me to parent myself. And that is the hardest thing that I’ve had to do for myself.” “Maging magulang sa sarili ko, that if I needed anybody. You know ‘di ko maasahan ‘yung magulang ko for money, for emotional supports, for validation. No I have to give that all to myself.” I don’t want to have kids because I feel like I am not ready and will never be ready physically, mentally and emotionally. A part of me always feels like I am going to be the same as my parents and I am still healing, for having an absent mother and father. My lola, lolo, tito and tita were always present to give me love and guidance. But it’s different. It’s still not our own parents guidance and love. At hanggang ngayon, masakit parin para sakin na isipin na I have to parent myself, and that is the hardest thing for me. But hey, I am an adult now and the best thing I can do for myself is to be better and to pray that my future kids (in God’s will) will not experience the same experience that I’ve had. I may look strong here, but this is what I built and this is what I taught my younger self. Because I am my own backup.

pagod na pagod na pero kailangan panindigan ang pagiging strong independent woman.