Writings of the Heart

[futechyan]

MAGHINTAY...hanggang sa kusa na lang siyang MAWALA

[pacey]

Emotions. I’ve been juggling with what feels like the whole spectrum for weeks on end. I’ve been trying to keep all the balls in play, but I keep missing a beat, and every time I try to pick one up, another (sometimes even more) just falls in its place. Instead, I’ve taken to simply holding them close to me. All of them. Each and every one, so I don’t drop my load and everything will fall apart. The thing is, my arms are not strong enough for this. I’m not strong enough.

 

I feel like pieces of me have been strewn all over the place. My mind’s off across the way, brooding. My heart’s under the covers trying to mend. And my soul? Why it’s lurking in that dark corner over there.

 

Dear God, I feel like I’m starting to lose my mind. How can one person vacillate from ecstasy to misery just like that? From believing in the possibility, from marveling at the miracle of things, to questioning you, me, and everything in between. I told you I was scared. I told you all my doubts, my fears. I asked you to catch me, because cheesy as it sounds, I was truly afraid to fall.

 

Yet fall I did. And while you did catch me, these days I feel like I’m falling still. I’m caught up in trying to find the balance and the clarity that I badly need, that which you seem to possess in abundance because it all seems too easy for you.

 

I’ve sworn to myself to not ask for things that aren’t mine to ask or yours to give. I’ve told you as much. You said to simply “Let it be.” That we will eventually find our rhythm. That things will fall into place.

 

Darling, I do try. I try very hard to compartmentalize. My thoughts, my feelings, ME. I try ever so hard to inject a sense of normalcy into all of this, and yet again, I find that I’m failing miserably.

 

The flip side is that, perhaps, in attempt to help me right myself, the universe is sending many good things along my way to off-set the bad. But little over-thinking me can’t help but question it, like I’ve been questioning us. Like I’ve been questioning you. I wonder if I truly deserve it all—the work, the happiness, you. It always comes back to you.

 

I look back on the events that have led us here. About yesterday, the day before, the week before, and so on. How did we get here, exactly? In as much as I feel like I’ve known you for years (technically, that’s true), I am very much aware that we’ve only touched upon the proverbial tip of the iceberg. I think about tomorrow, the week after, the month after, and the months after that, and I honestly don’t know what they’re going to have in store.

 

I am trying to hold on. To my hope and anxiety, my sense of wonder, contentment, and fear. I am trying to hold on to the love I feel for you, and for the love that you say you feel for me. But sometimes, there’s just too much. All this uncertainty is just too much. And while I know I’m strong, lately I don’t really feel like it anymore. I feel like if the breeze were to pick up a bit, all the pieces of me that I’ve been struggling to hold on to will crumble into a gazillion pieces and simply melt into the wind.

 

I love you.

[Viola]

December 17, 2009... Almost 2 years since you played with my heart. and I still love you. I know that you and I will never be together... that intense feeling you gave me.. it was just a game for you. I know that you have someone who loves you... and someone you love... but every time I try to love somebody else..i wish it was you instead.

 

every time i try to move on... an image of you comes to my mind... of you and I next to each other. I still feel your arms around as I sleep next to you. And your lips on my cheek, and that thing you said... "i love you". I know that moment, you did love me. it might be the only truth you said the entire time we were together. But that moment has passed. you made your choice, it wasn't me. too bad, i will choose you every single time.

[NightWriter]

Dear J,

 

It's been a year since we first met and i can see how consistent you were from that moment on till today that you love me. I love you too. I can't wait to be with you and be married to you

[MikeyArrovo]

sa tagal ng ating samahan bigla kang nagbago, paano na ung dati nating plano.

 

Kung si popoy nasaktan nung iwan ni basha at ibasura ng 5years paano pa kaya ung satin na 7 years, ewan ko ba parang sobrang sakit,

[jedai]

naiiyak na ko

[ConsistentlyInconsistent]

Dear L,

 

Welcome back into my life. Fate has slapped us with a second chance and yet, you still don't get it. You don't prepare for a relationship. I believe in that. When its meant to happen, it will. And I'm not holding a gun on your head anyway. I won't impose myself on you or anyone for that matter. I want you to want me bad enough to relent to a compromise of sorts.

 

I know you enough now to understand your fears. I know that a lesser woman would never really get you or the way you think. I don't want to rush things. I'm still reeling from losing my equilibrium when you left and when that jerk after you played with my head.

 

It's just that sometimes, I wish you wouldn't make things as complex. Life's tough enough as it is and I just want to enjoy whatever piece of happiness I could get my hands on.

 

I love you. You've always known that. But unless I hear those words from you, I won't hang around and leave my heart for pain to devour again. I'm stronger now. And I won't allow anything or anyone to break me the way you almost did once.

 

Tamed Wildchild

[Danicka18]

kung iiyak ka dahil sa kanya..sasamahan kita sa ilalim ng ulan dahil sa ilalim ng ulan hindi mo makikita ang mga luha ko para sayo

[blubalz]

Why did u left me when u said i was so right?

Do i deserve to be left when i am right?

[slimguyph]

Kakainis...

 

I tried to avoid you for months...so I could move on, then in one instant..I'm back where I started.

 

That's why I don't go to your events anymore, so we wouldn't cross each others paths.

 

Pero kagabi, why were you acting like that?

 

What's the kiss for?

 

What's the message of being good about?

 

 

I hate you...but walking away I just felt I wanted to be with you more.

 

 

Kakainis

[manongkalyo43]

its been a pleasure meeting you & loving you for the past 7 years , being the father of our son , kuwento mo na lang sa kanya ang totoong nangyari sa tamang panahon , if you got the nerve to say it . i love you , goodbye

[MikeyArrovo]

hataw, namiss mo ako , siguro gipit ka na ulit

[zzzleepyhead]

am not giving up on love

 

anyone now who agrees with me

 

can PM me

[sha79]

Apollo

 

It’s a fact, we can never really buy time so we stitch moment by moment

’til they materialize into a sweet blissful memory.

 

I’m okay having only a bit of your face and taste. Be that little trigger in your heart.

[uaeboy25]

i just started to regroup myself, coming from series of failures. And when I realizes that i choosen a wrong turn. I also realizes that i missed something i cant turn it back. a wasted moment.