cynophile

Sad realization today. I just realized na silently ako natanggalan ng work. or should I say, sideline. 😅 May handler ako na nagbibigay ng clients sa’kin for massage, on-call setup. Madalas may client ako weekly, consistent talaga siya mag-bigay. Pero last last week, he confessed na type daw niya ako, humahanap lang daw sya ng tyempo kasi nahihiya siya at sana daw ay may chance. Honestly, hindi ko siya gusto kaya sinabi ko agad na hindi pa ako interesado sa mga ganung bagay and I only see him as a friend or kuya (since I actually call him kuya). He replied na edi hihintayin daw nya maging interesado ako sa mga ganung bagay. I didn't reply na kasi ayoko talaga. Since then, bigla na lang akong di nabibigyan ng client. Mag weeks na I still message him na available ako, minsan pa nga I tell him I badly need it. Oo lang siya ng oo pero wala na talagang binibigay. Nakakalungkot lang kasi malaking tulong talaga yung mga clients na binibigay niya, pero hindi naman ibig sabihin nun na dapat magkagusto rin ako sa kanya. I could never like someone who knows the reality of my work, yet chooses to let me stay in this kind of industry. Unless this person could give me ibang opportunity. I continue my schooling this year, (grade 12) actually nagsstart na mga classmate ko na mag inquire sa mga preferred university nila to secure their slots for entrance exam. Sinasama nila ako kasi nga ubusan daw ng slot yun, pero nagdadalawang isip parin ako kasi baka masaktan lang ako pag makapasa ako tapos hindi ko naman pala kaya dahil nga sa sitwasyon ko sa buhay ngayon. I used to earn a lot before pero lugi na negosyo kaya bumalik ako sa pagthetherapist, as a breadwinner hindi kakayanin kung papasok ako sa mga minimum wage kind of work. Unless i give up ko nalang talaga yung studies ko. Ang sad na parang wala akong choice. 🙃

I just realized na I've been running for 8months na, have joined 10 fun run events alone, lahat ng takbo ko weekly alone. and may upcoming pa akong tatlong running event. (Jco, Minions and Mcdonalds) wala lang share ko lang. Sana sa susunod may kakiss na din ako sa finish line 😭 char haha. Kainis, hndi pala ako sa pagod mamamatay, sa inggit pala.🤣

Hello po! nag papapasok parin po ba ng magjojogging sa running/bike path ng CCLEX? hndi po ba naapektuhan ng earth quake? I always run kasi sa cclex every punta ko here sa cebu safe po kaya?

FAILED NOSE IN PARKING/HEAD-IN PARKING ATTEMPT. Hays, Bat andaming eagirls na umiiyak sa parallel at reverse parking when infact yun yung pinakamadaling gawin because nakikita mo sa side mirrors ang everything. Unlike sa pukinginang nose-in, nakakabadtrip bwisit. nakaka frustrate. nakakalungkot. nakakainis. hinagpis. poot at pasakit hahaha charot. PS : Di po ako nakabangga, ayaw lang talaga sumakto yung pasok kaya di ko na pinilit haha.

Saan po kaya may affordable na COLONOSCOPY? free sana sa PGH, kaso di po kaya pumila doon ng matagal Nagpa-quote ako St.Dom bacoor, almost 20k ang aabutin bawas na lahat ng discounts incl senior dscount. (this is for my grandfather) baka may mas mura pa pong hospital for this procedure?

dati bet ko yung "a thousand years" then naging "daylight" dahil swifties ako. ngayon, "I do cherish you" tapos si Michael Pangilinan yung kakanta haha New dream unlocked tuloy, saka na ko magmamahal pag afford ko na yung talent fee ni Michael Pangilinan para sya kakanta sa wedding ko. 🤣🤣 fantasy yarn hahahaha

I do believe in marriage. I'm a date-to-marry type of woman. Ang mindset ko, kung di mo ko nakikita as someone na pakakasalan mo someday e wag mo ko utuin. haha (yan yung di maintindihan ng friends ko e. kesyo matagal na daw ako single, na basta humihinga pwede na daw yon haha hell noooooo) 🤣

I found myself crying while typing my answers to the email I received from my father’s lawyer regarding their annulment. I just realized that I grew up having to accept the fact that there’s no such thing as perfect parents. While I was growing up, they were also growing as individuals and as parents, especially since they started their life together at such a young age (Mama was only 20, Papa was 19). I have to remind myself that everything that happened before was new to them, too. But maybe it’s really my inner child that’s still hard to heal. That part of me that longed for stability and safety, umiiyak pa rin siya. 💔

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Last night I broke down thinking, “babalik na ata ako sa dati kong buhay.” Sales have been declining, and akala ko retired therapist na ako for good, pero after almost 3 years, parang kailangan ko ulit bumalik kahit ayaw ko na. Pwede naman akong maghanap ng ibang work, pero I don’t want to give up my studies just for a minimum wage job na hindi rin kayang tustusan yung mga installments ko ngayon. Nakakalungkot lang. From earning 6 digits to halos mag-abono na. Life really has a way of humbling us. 😔 Natatakot ako, natatakot akong one day lalabas ulit ako ng pinto ng kwarto ng hotel na umiiyak kasi pakiramdam ko nabastos ako at hanggang doon nalang ako. Hindi naman lahat ng clients will make you feel that way but there are some talaga na kung bastusin ka, pilitin ka akala nila nabili nila yung buong ikaw. 😔

Saw a comment saying, "TUTUWAD PERO HINDI MAGPAPASAKOP." 🤣 I created a tiktok video and didn't expect it to blow up. Like, ang dami din pala nakakapansin na may itsura talaga itong si Engr. Brice. hahaha Cinompile ko lang yung videos nya from senate hearings with a caption, "Minsan ka nalang magka-crush, kay Brice Ericson Hernandez pa." 🤣 haha! attracted lang naman ako sa looks, like sheeesh eto ba ung tinatawag na "DADDY ISSUES" ? charot, ibalik nila yung ninakaw nila sa taong bayan! 🤣

may asawa sya ih

When im starting to like someone but God whispered, "Not this one, anak." 🥺

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Hindi ko alam bakit na-aattract ako kay Brice Ericson Hernandez. 🤣 hays. kakainis. Sa dami ng ninakaw nila sa taong bayan, di ko man lang sya naging client. HAHAHAHAHA charot.

The funny way traffic officers sometimes just randomly choose cars to stop. 😂 I was stuck in traffic in Pasay, and when the light turned green, I ended up in the middle of the intersection tapos stuck up parin. By the time it turned red, I was still there. When traffic started moving again, syempre umabante ako para hindi naman ako maging harang. Then the enforcer waved me over, asking why I went when the light was red. I explained I was literally stuck in the middle, so what else could I do? He kept insisting his side until I said, “Review natin yung dash cam ko bago mo ako ticketan.” Biglang nagbago mood niya: “Sige, pagbibigyan kita mam.” And I was like, “Ako pa pagbibigyan mo? Wala naman akong violation!” 🤣 Then he just laughed and said, “Maganda ka kasi, wag ka na mainit ulo.” Hahaha. Super funny moment.

Got approved sa EW with 320k c limit. platinum agad haha. wala natuwa lang ako kasi aside sa bpi na mahal na mahal ako e, may 2nd bank din na tumesting sakin tapos 6digits dn agad hahahaha! (daming bank na nagdecline sakin kaht ang taas ng limit ko sa bpi, visa sig holder and preferred client as well) Hello IPHONE 17 PRO MAX 1TB 🤣

I actually received compliments from two strangers today, both saying “Ang ganda mo.” 😅 Made me wonder, baka connected talaga sa pagiging 25 ko this month? Kasi recently ko lang napansin na iba na yung aura ko. Even in school, teachers na hindi ko naman kilala but I greet with a “good morning” kapag nasasalubong, sometimes they even start small conversations. They ask what year level or how old I am, kasi daw I look more lady-like for a student. Hahaha.

Feeling beautiful lately. 🌸 I don’t know why, pero ever since I turned 25 this month, bigla kong napansin na parang ang ganda ko. 😂 Maybe it’s the age, or maybe it’s because I just came from a silent rejection and chose to go back to my old self—the version of me before him. And now, I feel like I glow differently. ✨ Does rejection secretly make us glow? Hmmm. 🤔 or baka dahil nga 25 na ko and eto na ang full bloom ko since ito ang start ng adulthood? haha.

a week without run. huhu 1 week maulan so sad.