moichi Posted July 6, 2005 Share Posted July 6, 2005 Couldnt help but react to this... Thats the old double standard at work here... You men persist in treating women like fragile creatures... tryin to shield them from all this hurt... YET... you actually go ahead and do these hurtful things anyway.... What gives... Its like saying ... breaking the news gently to women takes away the hurtfulness of the news that you actually have to break... eg -- "I cheated on you hunny but because ill break it to you gently, it should hurt less." It doesnt work that way. Often, it becomes easier for us to take if you guys just go right out and be blunt about things -- the more direct, the easier to accept... I call this attitude a form of misguided chivalry ... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> that it is.. i agree that doing it "gently" doesn't make it less hurtful, but being blunt about it is not gonna make it easier too... the fact is, either way will be hurtful to the person on the receiving end of it... misguided or misdirected or totally missing the point, the fact remains that it happens... and to me, the situation will dictate the form of it... example1: the girl is strong and tough, maybe she can handle it... example2: a flighty, clingy, mousy girl who might even be suicidal, perhaps a "gentle" way would be helpful... (personally, i wouldn't want to be mixed up with this type) but in both cases, you know its gonna hurt like hell and all you're hoping for is a clean break, not a messy, scandalous scene of a crime... and in the guy's head, he is still firmly convinced that he is doing the right thing... Quote Link to comment
Wyld Posted July 6, 2005 Share Posted July 6, 2005 (edited) We'll just tell you directly, is that what you girls want? "I don't love you anymore, let's break up, goodbye." <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Not as blunt as that .. but certainly not in a roundabout way too. Theres this term I hear a lot -- consuelo de bobo. Dont say things just so you want us to feel better... thats almost like lying... that it is.. i agree that doing it "gently" doesn't make it less hurtful, but being blunt about it is not gonna make it easier too... the fact is, either way will be hurtful to the person on the receiving end of it... misguided or misdirected or totally missing the point, the fact remains that it happens... and to me, the situation will dictate the form of it... example1: the girl is strong and tough, maybe she can handle it... example2: a flighty, clingy, mousy girl who might even be suicidal, perhaps a "gentle" way would be helpful... (personally, i wouldn't want to be mixed up with this type) but in both cases, you know its gonna hurt like hell and all you're hoping for is a clean break, not a messy, scandalous scene of a crime... and in the guy's head, he is still firmly convinced that he is doing the right thing...<{POST_SNAPBACK}> i see your point moichi... well said. i guess youre right. i may be talking about my own personal preference for honesty here... for sure, there are ladies around who would prefer the gentler approach. fact remains though - there should be no lying peace y'all Edited July 6, 2005 by Wyld Quote Link to comment
elbaron1914 Posted July 6, 2005 Share Posted July 6, 2005 i think of it as a natural thing.. no one can have anything they want..if it happens to me, i just shrug it off and say.. "madami pang iba dyan" Quote Link to comment
moichi Posted July 6, 2005 Share Posted July 6, 2005 Not as blunt as that .. but certainly not in a roundabout way too. Theres this term I hear a lot -- consuelo de bobo. Dont say things just so you want us to feel better... thats almost like lying... ]i see your point moichi... well said. i guess youre right. i may be talking about my own personal preference for honesty here... for sure, there are ladies around who would prefer the gentler approach. fact remains though - there should be no lying peace y'all ]<{POST_SNAPBACK}> yey! peace! Quote Link to comment
elbaron1914 Posted July 8, 2005 Share Posted July 8, 2005 let go.. to ponder and assess the next steps in a relationship.. Quote Link to comment
Guest simply_miss Posted July 8, 2005 Share Posted July 8, 2005 naku sis, may kilala akong ganyan!! parehong pareho... i think nag-ego tripping lang mga guys na ganyan... u should move on na... sayang lang oras mo sa kanya!!! sa palagay ko lang naman... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Siguro nga ego tripping...feeling nila reward at award ka para sa kanila, that's why they still can't let goThey ask for the "space" and when you give it, mas nagiging demanding sila, wors, napapa praning pag may nakikitang silang kaiba or coldness sa treatment ng babae. You can't demand, but he does.....kasi kundi you'll argue and discuss.....pero he's asking space nung lagay na yun UNFAIR di ba? HOPE WHEN WE TELL OUR PARTNER WE NEED A SPACE, YOU CAN STAND BY IT AND DON'T TORTURE THE OTHER PARTY EMOTIONALLY and MENTALLY BY BEING UNSTABLE WITH YOUR EMOTIONS. Nakakaawa....i should have known better Quote Link to comment
bald pussy Posted July 9, 2005 Share Posted July 9, 2005 I need space...for me, it's just like saying...Will I miss u? and if not well, let's stop what we've started. But if I will, i'll be back with u. Sometimes, we need to be alone for us to know what we want. Quote Link to comment
sherry Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 tama sabi niya.. we eed to be alonefor us to know what we really what.. Quote Link to comment
swtsexythng® Posted July 17, 2005 Share Posted July 17, 2005 "gus2 nya maging austronaut kya he needs space... Quote Link to comment
blackthunder Posted July 17, 2005 Share Posted July 17, 2005 space, dont be so possesive. give some free time to your partner to enjoy life w/o you, for a while!!! :heart: Quote Link to comment
_Pabling Posted July 17, 2005 Share Posted July 17, 2005 masikip? jk... "ayaw ko na" Quote Link to comment
Macy Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Moderator's Note: Merging into Perfect Dumping Speeches Quote Link to comment
sherry Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 i think of it as a natural thing.. no one can have anything they want..if it happens to me, i just shrug it off and say.. "madami pang iba dyan"<{POST_SNAPBACK}> parang narinig ko na yan hehe.. Quote Link to comment
Dirt ±°±• Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 para hindi masakit ganito sabihin mo : " alam mo perfect ka.. ok ka.. maganda/guapo ka.. masarap ka magmahal.. maasikaso ka.. malambing.. seksi.. at higit sa lahat.. gusto kitang kasama.. ako ang may problema... kasi... SINUNGALING AKO! " Quote Link to comment
in_vitro Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 I dont think such a perfect speech exist... coz whatever you say or do, someone is bound to get hurt... Quote Link to comment
chamberra Posted October 2, 2005 Share Posted October 2, 2005 break up line ba...?e2 n yta ang pinkmsakit n narinig ko... i need time and space..im so so so so so so tired of u na pag0d nko..i just wanna lay down beside u na..skit noH... Quote Link to comment
Guest REBEL_CHIC Posted October 2, 2005 Share Posted October 2, 2005 i always tell na: "INDE NA AKO MASAYA EH AT AYOKO NA MASAKTAN KA LNG SA HULI, UVE BEEN SO KIND TO ME AND SORRY IF YOU FEEL NA PARANG I JUST PLAYED WITH YOU" tapos naka2inis pa yung ibang guy... pag sinabihan mo ng ganun lagi nag-eeffort para ka sumaya... i'd been hurt once kasi hirap n ako makawala s kahapon ko.. ngayon ang bilis ko na magpalit bf... kung minsan sabay sabay pa... the worst thing the more n tinatapat ko kung gaano ako kasamang babae the more na nagho2ld sila sa relation :cry: Quote Link to comment
Clinks Posted October 2, 2005 Share Posted October 2, 2005 "I found someone else eh. Sorry ha." :cry: Quote Link to comment
pogingpogi Posted October 3, 2005 Share Posted October 3, 2005 your too good for me you deserve someone better than me....maraming salamat sa lahat ng tinulong pti advise mo skin....pagkailangan mo ko dito lang ko palage......baka kase pagmagttagal pa tyo masasaktan lang kita lalo.... Quote Link to comment
Tanya08 Posted November 14, 2005 Share Posted November 14, 2005 i love you and i will always love you.. if time comes you wont be hearing anything frm me, it doesnt mean i did forget u... nver ever think of it, neither think that im angry because i wont and never will i... maybe time comes for me to free myself, to wake up from my slumber, to control my heart not to fall in love with you again coz i am just hurting myself in the process.. i knw and feel i may not hve you in the end, so id rather learn not hve u now.. but one thing is 4 sure that.. my FRIENDSHIP would remain.. honestly it would... i want u to know that i wil nver ever waste the yrs we hve shared as friends because of our mistakes... things happened and so be it... but what matters the most is the acceptance that after all... hey we are still friends!... finally all im asking is that... hope u wuld smile when u happen to remember me... GOD BLESS AND I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment
astig_supah_ganda Posted November 20, 2005 Share Posted November 20, 2005 "sinubukan kong intindihan ka sa lahat..but it does'nt work.. so i decidedto end dis.. i stil want yu to be my fren.." :sick: :cry: Quote Link to comment
gig0l0 Posted November 21, 2005 Share Posted November 21, 2005 "....i dont love you anymore. and i'd be fooling myself to pretend that i still care." i know that hurts but it's better that way.....than to make her believe otherwise....and make us both look stupid. Quote Link to comment
hon_23 Posted December 7, 2005 Share Posted December 7, 2005 Im very sorry.. Mahal na mahal kita pero ito ung tama.. Basta pag kailangan mo ko nandito lang ako.. U will always be here 4ever(sabay turo sa heart nya).. Ayusin mong pag-aaral mo ha? Ingatan mo palage sarili mo.. Kumain ka ng maayos..(sabay kiss sa noo) ohhh God! Ang hirap nun ha!.. Quote Link to comment
Manticore Posted December 7, 2005 Share Posted December 7, 2005 The thought just crossed my mind a few moments ago (although this pertains not to a relationship, but to an embarrassing situation.) I was tempted to say in my best Keanu Reeves impression, "Operator, I need an exit." heheheh. Para hindi OT: Honesty may be the best policy when breaking up, but I suppose it wouldn't hurt to soften the blow a bit. After all, this is a rather delicate situation. Tell her the specifics. The decision to break up is never an easy one, and you must have the best intentions in doing so (that pursuing the relationship further would only cause more harm than good, especially when your heart is no longer into it---if this is the case.) Tell her you carry the weight of this decision, because it was your choice---not hers. Make her know that she shouldn't blame herself why you feel this way. Words of consolation may be out of place, since you'll be the source of her grief, so it's probably better not to try and comfort her. Once you've broken the news, if she asks to be left alone, respect her wishes, but if she wishes to discuss it, then answer her questions as truthfully as possible. Once all is said and done, try to part ways as friends. If she's too hurt to accept your offer, don't force it. It's the toughest thing to do, I agree. But it's even tougher to pretend that you still love her when you no longer feel that way. That's even more unfair to her (and yourself) if you think about it. Quote Link to comment
Tanya08 Posted December 7, 2005 Share Posted December 7, 2005 exit line ko sa mga ex ko b4... through letter lng lahat.. hehe nde ko kse kaya na makita silang nasasaktan.. ...thank you for all the good things you've done to me etc etc etc.. im so sori wala sayo ang problema na saken, i hope sna mapatawad mo ko.. nde ko gusto n saktan ka... but im really really sori... and i mean it dearly.. after that break up.. nde muna ako nakipag bf ulet for months.. jst to show/prove to him na nde 3rd party ang reason y i broke up wid him.. its jst that pasaway lng tlga ako.. i guess na-fall out of love lng and batang isip p kse ako nun and nde ko maramdaman na sila n nga yung taong hinahanap ko.. Quote Link to comment
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