katieholmes Posted June 29, 2005 Share Posted June 29, 2005 i agree tapos dadagdagan pa ng hahanap kita ng friends tutulungan kita..parang hello ano ako inutil na walang mga kaibigan...pity is good pero it should be given in a proper place and time..mas lalo lng sumasakit sa taong tinatamaan...minsan try to be in the person's shoe's lets see how they would react...ive been there just makes me mad everytime i remember it...sensya na just voicing out my feelings...fish tyo :cool:<{POST_SNAPBACK}> as for me, if i say to a guy that "you're too good for me, and that you'll find someone better", I MEAN TO SAY "tell me what i want to hear, that I am the one for you and that you want all of me". The truth is, women fish for things they actually want to hear by saying words opposite of what they mean Quote Link to comment
^Tim^ Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 as for me, if i say to a guy that "you're too good for me, and that you'll find someone better", I MEAN TO SAY "tell me what i want to hear, that I am the one for you and that you want all of me". The truth is, women fish for things they actually want to hear by saying words opposite of what they mean <{POST_SNAPBACK}> well... as "Hitch" says... "any man has the chance to sweep a woman off her feet. He just needs the right broom"... . in retrospect... guys should pick the words as to what they turly feel... and not just to impress their woman :cool: it's not just all talk... the body language must go naturally... :boo: but of course when you're wooing your woman, yo gotta speak to her as sincere as ya could...say what ya want...deep inside... not too much mushy... just just say it.. :cool: well, doesnt work for everyone... but it's still worth the try.... Quote Link to comment
honeybitch Posted July 1, 2005 Share Posted July 1, 2005 wish there is someone for me out there Quote Link to comment
Pink_Popsicle Posted July 1, 2005 Share Posted July 1, 2005 For me, the BOY who utters these lines would either be a - Totally insecure and scared, has nothing to show for himself and probably has issues as far as inadequacy (sexual or otherwise) is concerned, or - b - Is totally guilty of having an affair, another woman or a fling, and does not have the balls to own up to it. Either way, when your man utters these lines to you, RUN. As fast as you can, in the opposite direction. You will be far better off without this weakling. Quote Link to comment
Manticore Posted July 4, 2005 Share Posted July 4, 2005 (edited) This one made my night sad. Not because I feel for you Manticore, but I'd rather say, I empathize with your EX more. I'm sorry. I know it's kinda ironic. But just like her, I am "the type who can never say "no" if it would hurt another person." And that "She wants to make everyone happy. Problem is, someone always ends up being left out."But my story has not ended the way your ex's story did (primarily because, I am not HAPPILY married). I've been bad. I've been hurt a lot of times and I admit I have my share of hurting some of my partners too. All because I can't and don't want to hurt anybody for that matter even if "someone always ends up being left out." Those I have hurt are the ones who loved me truly but whom I have to let go because of several "selfish" reasons too. I admire men like you....who happens to stand up for what should be done and not for what choice is there to make. You got hurt but there is no glimpse of pain in the way you related your story. Congrats bro! you're one man, who makes a "bad" lady like me realize "bad" things I did in the past and might to in the future! :hypocritesmiley: keep it up! the world needs you! <{POST_SNAPBACK}>When the situation is beyond repair, what is one to do? It's essentially out of my hands, because I only have control over my own choices. The reason why I made that judgment call was that I was aware that she was in a crisis situation. All eyes were on her. It was one of those things where you're 'damned if you do, damned if you don't'. Knowing her well enough helped me to decide what was best for all. Had she chosen me, she'd lose face with most of the people who are near and dear to her, because of certain loyalties that were formed, especially when her engagement with the other guy was in the offing. She couldn't live with the fact that she'd be hurting my feelings by choosing him, though. She was paralyzed with bewilderment and was headed for a total meltdown. I had to step in and relieve her from the burden of that decision. She usually prays for a sign to point her in the right direction. It was up to me to set things straight, so I took it upon myself and ended our relationship in order to provide a graceful exit for her. She had it rough, being practically alone during our long distance affair. She sacrificed so much in order to pursue a better life in the States; I'd only be getting in the way. She's a victim of circumstance, more than anything else. Being someone who gets along well with everyone and to enjoy being in a group isn't a crime; neither is having the uncanny ability to captivate anyone she meets. It's really sweet how she's unable to turn other people down, to be so eager to put them at ease. I adore the fact that she treats everyone nicely, without any reservation. It came as no surprise how not a few guys would work up the courage to court her, even when she's already in a relationship. That was the risk I willingly took when she went abroad. Someone was bound to find his way to her heart, eventually...homesickness, notwithstanding. Dilemmas of this sort could've scarred her for life. She needn't suffer the kind of pain this decision entailed. Please do not feel that such choices make you a 'bad' person. You did what you had to do, and that's all there is to it. Edited July 4, 2005 by Manticore Quote Link to comment
nataraki Posted July 4, 2005 Share Posted July 4, 2005 That line is such a cop out... The guy who uses that line doesnt have enough balls to tell the truth so he uses that euphemism for... "I want out of this relationship, I have found someone else." <_< <{POST_SNAPBACK}>dapat kung may balls silang manligaw.. dapat may balls din sila na magsabi ng totoo! wala ng paligoy ligoy pa. no BS.. no kind words!<{POST_SNAPBACK}>what if we look it in a man's point of view, coz women also put up this line to men, how then should a lady do such things as to what you ladies want a man with balls do. isn't it also applicable to ladies who keep their suitors or bf's in the hanging while they're promenading/romancing/flirting with other guys on the side? isn't this a little more nicer way of ending a relationship than saying nothing at all? Quote Link to comment
nataraki Posted July 4, 2005 Share Posted July 4, 2005 For me, the BOY who utters these lines would either be a - Totally insecure and scared, has nothing to show for himself and probably has issues as far as inadequacy (sexual or otherwise) is concerned, or - b - Is totally guilty of having an affair, another woman or a fling, and does not have the balls to own up to it. Either way, when your man utters these lines to you, RUN. As fast as you can, in the opposite direction. You will be far better off without this weakling.<{POST_SNAPBACK}>well, i agree with you in this aspect. more often than not, it would fall to your letter "a" choice wherein a guy or a lady would feel or think that they cant reciprocate everything thats offered to by his/her partner or it maybe that they are so pessimistic to believe that someone as good as their partner can really be theirs hence the line "you're just too good to be true"! as per your second choice (, naturally all persons who commit mistakes and guilty enough to consider saving face or harakiri would look for the nicest and most subtle way of exiting a failed relationship. while it may be said that sometimes people want the truth in everything, sometimes people just cant handle the truth. so i'd say that in some instance, this kind of saving faces can actually do a little more damage control than laying the whole truth to the open hence the saying what you dont know wont hurt you. Quote Link to comment
moichi Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 For me, the BOY who utters these lines would either be a - Totally insecure and scared, has nothing to show for himself and probably has issues as far as inadequacy (sexual or otherwise) is concerned, or - b - Is totally guilty of having an affair, another woman or a fling, and does not have the balls to own up to it. Either way, when your man utters these lines to you, RUN. As fast as you can, in the opposite direction. You will be far better off without this weakling.<{POST_SNAPBACK}> things is there are many boys out there who don't see it that way... they believe in the saying "break it to me gently"... to the point of believing that its actually a disservice to girls to be blunt and brutally honest... Quote Link to comment
Wyld Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 things is there are many boys out there who don't see it that way... they believe in the saying "break it to me gently"... to the point of believing that its actually a disservice to girls to be blunt and brutally honest...<{POST_SNAPBACK}> Couldnt help but react to this... Thats the old double standard at work here... You men persist in treating women like fragile creatures... tryin to shield them from all this hurt... YET... you actually go ahead and do these hurtful things anyway.... What gives... Its like saying ... breaking the news gently to women takes away the hurtfulness of the news that you actually have to break... eg -- "I cheated on you hunny but because ill break it to you gently, it should hurt less." It doesnt work that way. Often, it becomes easier for us to take if you guys just go right out and be blunt about things -- the more direct, the easier to accept... I call this attitude a form of misguided chivalry ... Quote Link to comment
devil_lance Posted July 6, 2005 Share Posted July 6, 2005 Couldnt help but react to this... Thats the old double standard at work here... You men persist in treating women like fragile creatures... tryin to shield them from all this hurt... YET... you actually go ahead and do these hurtful things anyway.... What gives... Its like saying ... breaking the news gently to women takes away the hurtfulness of the news that you actually have to break... eg -- "I cheated on you hunny but because ill break it to you gently, it should hurt less." It doesnt work that way. Often, it becomes easier for us to take if you guys just go right out and be blunt about things -- the more direct, the easier to accept... I call this attitude a form of misguided chivalry ... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> We'll just tell you directly, is that what you girls want? "I don't love you anymore, let's break up, goodbye." Quote Link to comment
moichi Posted July 6, 2005 Share Posted July 6, 2005 Couldnt help but react to this... Thats the old double standard at work here... You men persist in treating women like fragile creatures... tryin to shield them from all this hurt... YET... you actually go ahead and do these hurtful things anyway.... What gives... Its like saying ... breaking the news gently to women takes away the hurtfulness of the news that you actually have to break... eg -- "I cheated on you hunny but because ill break it to you gently, it should hurt less." It doesnt work that way. Often, it becomes easier for us to take if you guys just go right out and be blunt about things -- the more direct, the easier to accept... I call this attitude a form of misguided chivalry ... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> that it is.. i agree that doing it "gently" doesn't make it less hurtful, but being blunt about it is not gonna make it easier too... the fact is, either way will be hurtful to the person on the receiving end of it... misguided or misdirected or totally missing the point, the fact remains that it happens... and to me, the situation will dictate the form of it... example1: the girl is strong and tough, maybe she can handle it... example2: a flighty, clingy, mousy girl who might even be suicidal, perhaps a "gentle" way would be helpful... (personally, i wouldn't want to be mixed up with this type) but in both cases, you know its gonna hurt like hell and all you're hoping for is a clean break, not a messy, scandalous scene of a crime... and in the guy's head, he is still firmly convinced that he is doing the right thing... Quote Link to comment
Wyld Posted July 6, 2005 Share Posted July 6, 2005 (edited) We'll just tell you directly, is that what you girls want? "I don't love you anymore, let's break up, goodbye." <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Not as blunt as that .. but certainly not in a roundabout way too. Theres this term I hear a lot -- consuelo de bobo. Dont say things just so you want us to feel better... thats almost like lying... that it is.. i agree that doing it "gently" doesn't make it less hurtful, but being blunt about it is not gonna make it easier too... the fact is, either way will be hurtful to the person on the receiving end of it... misguided or misdirected or totally missing the point, the fact remains that it happens... and to me, the situation will dictate the form of it... example1: the girl is strong and tough, maybe she can handle it... example2: a flighty, clingy, mousy girl who might even be suicidal, perhaps a "gentle" way would be helpful... (personally, i wouldn't want to be mixed up with this type) but in both cases, you know its gonna hurt like hell and all you're hoping for is a clean break, not a messy, scandalous scene of a crime... and in the guy's head, he is still firmly convinced that he is doing the right thing...<{POST_SNAPBACK}> i see your point moichi... well said. i guess youre right. i may be talking about my own personal preference for honesty here... for sure, there are ladies around who would prefer the gentler approach. fact remains though - there should be no lying peace y'all Edited July 6, 2005 by Wyld Quote Link to comment
elbaron1914 Posted July 6, 2005 Share Posted July 6, 2005 i think of it as a natural thing.. no one can have anything they want..if it happens to me, i just shrug it off and say.. "madami pang iba dyan" Quote Link to comment
moichi Posted July 6, 2005 Share Posted July 6, 2005 Not as blunt as that .. but certainly not in a roundabout way too. Theres this term I hear a lot -- consuelo de bobo. Dont say things just so you want us to feel better... thats almost like lying... ]i see your point moichi... well said. i guess youre right. i may be talking about my own personal preference for honesty here... for sure, there are ladies around who would prefer the gentler approach. fact remains though - there should be no lying peace y'all ]<{POST_SNAPBACK}> yey! peace! Quote Link to comment
elbaron1914 Posted July 8, 2005 Share Posted July 8, 2005 let go.. to ponder and assess the next steps in a relationship.. Quote Link to comment
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