The Mail Box

[sheila70]

Hey, Baby!!!

 

Glad we talked. Everything's clear now. For a moment I thought ... well, I just have to do what I have to do. One thing's for sure

and I really am, more than sure

 

I :heart: u JB

[Alex_Corvis]

Dear Bevs,

 

It’s been 4 months since we parted on our own way. I miss you still. I remember the days when we used to go on mall hopping, trying all the clothes and pants that we like, but never buying them. Make prank calls from jumbled phone numbers. Criticize people loudly and don’t give a damn about the world. Your friends call us the bitch and the assh*le duo.

 

I can say we were at the same wavelength back then. We used to have the same attitude (screw me, I’ll screw you), Same outlook (the world sucks) and even the same motto (my signature I owe to you). You hate mushy stuffs, abhor romance movies and love songs. You say such things don’t happen in real life, and I believed you ( I used to be an outcaste back then remember?). Together we share the path of morbid ness, apathy and indifference, we only have each other. You’ve been through a lot of crises, I know. Maybe that’s why you hate Life so much. Me? I don’t hate life as you do, it’s just a little bit complicated.

 

Last month, I accompanied my father to my granny’s house. She said she fixed all the documents, and my grandpa’s will just in case, when the time comes that she have to leave us. Of course my father told her not to say such things. I looked for my grandpa’s reaction, which is just a couple of feet away from us. He’s a oblivious and just stare at the TV. Living a life in waste took its toll on him (he’s just 72). My father said “can’t papay be first to go?” and my Granny replied “ sometimes I wanted to pray for that too, but that’s a sin isn’t it? And besides I’m too old, HE will soon fetch me” She looked at my Grandpa and blew her a kiss; he caught it with his trembling hand and kissed his hand. Grandpa smiled a toothless grin.

 

I wasn’t feeling good that day, but after the visit I felt better. Not because someone is wishing someone to die (which we do a lot back then) but because of the realization that all things happens with a reason. Right now there are a lot of good things happening to me, in love. All things end naturally. We just have to accept it. Be ready for it.

 

Too bad you were so hasty. You didn’t want to wait for your chances.

It’s been 4 months since we parted – permanently. And I miss you still.

 

Missing you,

F

[shrike]

EMPTINESS

 

you left ...

like the wind,

on a cold, starless night

leaving nothing untouched.

 

you are gone ...

and it's a reality

taking with you everything

evrything that means to me.

 

i was not wise ...

i should have loved you less

i should have left something

for memories.

 

coz everytime i searched

within my heart

i find nothing

 

only a sense of emptiness

no trace of the love

i once had

for you

 

only regrets.

[lord_rochester]

shrike Posted on Nov 25 2003, 05:11 PM

  EMPTINESS

 

you left ...

like the wind,

on a cold, starless night

leaving nothing untouched.

 

you are gone ...

and it's a reality

taking with you everything

evrything that means to me.

 

i was not wise ...

i should have loved you less

i should have left something

for memories.

 

coz everytime i searched

within my heart

i find nothing

 

only a sense of emptiness

no trace of the love

i once had

for you

 

only regrets. 

 

never regret shrike.

 

to fhm,

 

you know how things stand between us. we are nothing more but friends. we both decided on that when you can't leave her. remember ... always remember.

 

no matter how right it feels to have your arms around me... things will never change. no matter how many times you say "i love you" the fact still remains that you can't leave her. and your "i love you's" mean nothing to me.

 

today, we spent it together. as friends... remember?

 

then why did you have to kiss me? why? i didn't ask for it... i didn't encourage it. i was asleep remember? why?

 

how could you say you love me and yet be someone else's man?

 

stop it. just stop.

 

make your choice... are we friends? or should we be lovers? would you leave her? or would you let me go?

 

please remember... cause everytime you forget... my heart also wants me to forget...

[lord_rochester]

to you,

 

i've already forgotten you. i'm sorry if i didn't inform you that things are over between us.

 

you should have known it the day you had sex with her... you know i'll find it out somehow. you should have known it.

 

when you get home with your ring and your promises... i'll tell you it's over. i don't want you, i don't need you and i don't need your ring and your promises. i don't want to marry you now and ever. it's over.

 

i've moved on. and though you caused me the greatest pain in my life.. i've moved on.

 

if you ask me if i love you still my answer would be yes. but i lost my respect for you. and it's something that i can't give back...

 

so go. just go. the tears will dry up, and time will pass. life will go on and so will i.

[sweetpsyche]

irog,

buti na lamang at di ko sinabi sa iyo kung ano talaga ang aking nadarama dahil kung nagkataon e sa wala rin pala mapupunta. mabuti na lang at nakaya kong tiisin na di sabihin sa iyo na mahal na kita. magiging masaya na lang ako sa pagkakaibigan natin, kahit papano e maipapadama ko pa rin sa iyo na mahalaga ka sa akin.

 

sawi

Dear DOM,

 

bilib ako sayo.

wag ka magalala kaya mo po yan.

andito lang kami

[sweetpsyche]

Dear BUnv of US

 

Are you aware that the moment I found out we are migrating to US of A; you were the one who first came into my mind - the fact that I will be closer to you that you will be just within my reach. And that thought simply made everything facile. Before I have known you, I lived a peaceful life. I could go and return home and feel no trouble. But now, I am a disturbed mind and soul.

 

It cannot be my imagination or is it that love has struck too deeply and that I must pay sacrifice for what is asked of me? I have tried to restrain myself. I have tried to stifle my longings knowing that I will not even fit to be on your side. But Cupid's orders are imperative. Who am I to battle the call of fate? I know that when I saw you, Cupid had marked me for his victim. Yes, it is love that has taken root in my heart. But I have been so foolish to hug delusions to my heart. I should not have persisted even when I saw the shadow of your stature. Let me console myself that I have loved you in name only, a way that lingers only in imagination, in a mere dreams, in fantasy, the creation of mind. Here I am still longing for your attention

 

I have never stopped thinking about you. It's not just a physical attraction; I loved and admired you for every single thing you are. Every word you say, every step you take. Every thing said about you. This is something that will never die. I have tried to stay reasonable with this, but I just can't anymore. I just can't. There is something I can see in your eyes that only few people can see. But I’m glad I was able to see it.

There was no day that I haven’t thought about you. It was like; I can feel you in all my senses. I can’t even eradicate from my vivid mind your existence. I was spellbound by your presence. And you are one of the reasons why I looked forward on moving to this country. I thought about you when I was saying goodbye to my friends, I thought about you when I said goodbye to my special someone, for a mere thought of you made the reality of me leaving the country where I grew up, easier. Leaving for me then, wasn’t that painful for I deep inside me I know I will be closer to the one thing I have always dreamt and hoped to attain. For me, you are far more important. I feel like you hypnotized me. The sound of your name gives me shivers that I can’t explain. You have no idea how you have affected my life.

When we came here things were not the way I expected them to be. Yet we managed to survive, and one of the things that keep me going is YOU. The dreaming which includes day-dreaming of course, hoping, wishing and praying that someday I will witness with my own two eyes the beauty that you behold, that I will someday have you in my life and I will be in yours.

That I will be able to breathe the sweet aroma that surrounds you, feel the warmth and caring touch of yours, experience a life with you, laugh and cry because of you, succeed and be defeated through you, and most of all have you as my guide as I embark my own journey. That only you can help me be what I am and what I ought to be.

Though I don’t have you yet I acted as if we are together already. Without you knowing it you became the sole reason of my survival… you meant everything to me, though I know I mean nothing to you. I have absorbed you into my being and forced myself not to see the truth that lies within you and ignored the fact that for people like me you are unreachable.

And now… reality hit me. You are a far-fetched dream. I cant have you, for I am just a nobody. Thus, for a moment I’m giving up this dream of mine… for a moment. I will store you in my keepsake and get back to you when I know I have made enough of myself and wont be embarrassed to face you. For a moment I will do what I have to do. I have come to terms to the reality of my life. Today, I chose to leave you and say goodbye then lead my life in the real world. I want you to know too that I chose to leave not because I wanted to but also because I have certain values in life that I prioritize. I too value other people, people that are important to me than myself. And I’m giving you up because of them, because of my desire to see them succeed first.

I know I must say goodbye to you for now… maybe this isn’t the right time yet for us. Bu its only FOR A MOMENT, for I am not completely giving up on you. I am just putting you aside but that doesn’t mean I have completely lost my hope on you. No I haven’t and believe me I never will. I will forever wish and pray that our day will do come, a day wherein everything will just fall into its place. A moment of perfection, a moment nothing but just the two of us together, in my world. I know that we have so much to give to each other and I look forward to that day. I believe it is closer now than ever before. It is just that there may be a few more obstacles that we need to clear up, and I think you know what I am talking about. Besides that, I know we’ll get through it.

For now, let me spread my wings and try the others, they may not be as good as you are but I am positive they will be a great help to me. So please let me. And after that I’ll come back to you… I only wish one thing though, that you will accept me with open arms…

Till then… I will just be here… keep on dreaming about you… admiring you from a distance.

 

dreaming about you,

just me.

[soul]

Dear sweetpsyche,

 

I'm falling in love with your very poetic and imaginative mind...

[sheila70]

Hey, Baby!!!

 

I'm glad I met you

 

You made me realize a lot of things. I may have brought this upon myself, maybe because I deserve it or maybe I need to hear it from other people but I know I'm not hurting anyone else except myself

 

Thanks for the wake-up call

 

I :heart: u JB

[Z]

Dear A,

 

You know where I come from, you know where I've been. To articulate these feeling I know not how to begin. I've been scarred enough and do not rue the truth therein. My thoughts have drawn out, certainty at the brim. Time my enemy yet also a friend. I seek you not for what I used to fill, that I've found in my meanderings by just sitting still. I seek you now quibbling on what to offer, silence engulfs me when all that matters is for you to prosper. A choice is easy - on my end at least, provided joy pervades you in this shared sojourn. Still I slog on what I truly want to say, I lay bare my heart and soul as one breathes air....

[Z]

Funny, I still ended up sending it to her Cross the bridge when you get there. Sorry for being slightly off topic

[LostCommand]

Lady,

 

I am not an angel. I will do what has to be done to win the game, and if I have to use deceit, cruelty, and if I have to lose my own friends, so be it. My eternal soul itself, not just flesh and blood, are expendable. If the objective is worthy enough or honourable enough, I will sell the immortal souls of others too, and corrupt their innocence and send them straight to hell. Living in an imperfect material world, I judge people if they can do me harm, or good, or do me nothing. My ambition is crass, to stay in charge and if possible to be in charge of more. I can not sleep at night, plotting to advance my plans, and scheming to sabotage and destroy the plans of others in this merciless game of life. I laugh at those I have roughly ridden down, and throw back fine smooth whiskey with my finger still on the warm trigger. I talk roughly and loud, suffering from a bad left ear caused by too much gunfire in my younger days.

 

I am not a devil. The poor and lesser who serve me, my family, and my affairs, share much in my victories. I do not crave acknowledgement, even if it could have served me well. I have never paid for the forced company of unwilling women. The kisses of those (few) ladies whose lives intersected mine even if but briefly me have burned their mark in my heart, one by one. And I take them home always. Poor helpless meowling kittens and their anxious mommy cats always find a place and some food in my house, especially when it is raining outside.

 

And I give back to others what respect and goodness they give to me.

 

Lady, there are many shades of grey among men. And among women too. Understand that. And in understanding that, therefore lose your preconceptions, that all are either black or white, good or bad.

 

We are not angels. We are not devils. We are human, and so struggle with choices, like heroes oftentimes, to do what must be done. So that in these dark mortal realms, day shall come again.

 

rgds, LC

 

PS, if we men and women can get and honest and affectionate lay along the way, is that too bad? after all, it is not as if we are sure of going to heaven...

[kcasey200kc]

LOVING EACH OTHER: Some Solicited Advice

 

Don't think in terms of forever. Think of now, and forever will take care

of itself.

 

Grow up together, constantly.

 

Expect to invest a great deal of time and energy in your relationship.

Lasting relationships don't just happen, they are created.

 

Recognize that all relationships cannot be forever. Recognize their

temporary quality, but continue to act as if they are permanent.

 

Respect the other person's relationships apart from you. If they are

important to the one you care about, they should be important to you.

 

Never idealize others. They will never live up to your expectations.

 

Take your time.

 

Remove price tags from people. Everyone has worth; the excitement lies in

the discovery of their value.

 

Don't be afraid of giving. You can never give too much, if you're giving

willingly.

 

Don't feel as if you are required to spend every waking hour with those

you love. Move aside from time to time and allow them a separate space too.

 

Never force anyone to do anything for you in the name of love. Love is

not to be bargained for.

 

Don't be afraid.

 

Don't overanalyze your relationships.

 

Realize that you always have choices. It's up to you.

 

Remember that a relationship is a pooling of resources. It means that

with each relationship you are not only giving, but you are becoming more.

 

Don't allow relationships to burden your heart; rather use it to become

more aware and sensitive.

 

Don't smother each other. No one can grow in shade.

 

Don't lose in touch with the craziness in you. This, with a large dose of

caring, will assure that your relationship will never be boring.

 

Don't brood. Get on with living and loving. You don't have forever.

 

Don't hold on to anger. they steal your energy and keep you from love.

 

There are times when you want to give up on a relationship but never give

up on relating.

 

Learn to listen. You don't learn anything from hearing yourself talk.

 

Expect what is reasonable, not what is perfect.

 

Write down all the reasons why you love each person you relate with.

Then, when the going gets tough, take the list out and reread it. It

resolves problems quickly.

 

After an argument is over, forget it.

 

Don't become involved in pettiness, ego and childish hurts. Those will

only serve to degrade your relationship and prevent closeness.

 

Learn to bend. It's better than breaking.

 

Since love can be created, there is no reason to be loveless.

 

Even though you are only half of a relationship, you must remain a whole

person, apart from the relationship.

 

Remember that moral and spiritual values don't restrict, they protect.

 

Don't fall in love with love, you'll die with its complexities.

 

Don't allow your relationships to die of neglect.

 

 

 

:heart: :heart: :heart:

[ukyo_batusai]

ngaun lang po ako napadaan dito... gandang hapon po...

[kcasey200kc]

AN OPEN LETTER TO MY FUTURE HUSBAND

Kcasey200kc

Even though I don't know exactly who you'll be yet, I think of YOU often. I wonder how you're living you're life now. It matter to me, YOU know, because how you live your life now determines what kind of MAN you're becoming…… and the kind of MAN I'll spend the rest of my life with..

Apparently, for some bizarre reason, manhood doesn't come automatically for males. Some GUYS seem to spend their entire lives trying to "PROVE THEIR MANHOOD"- by hurting, playing sports, driving past…. And fortunately by having SEX. It seems rather strange to us women that GUYS think having SEX proves you're a MAN. To us, it just proves that you've reach puberty. And we don't really consider that, in itself, to be any GREAT ACCOMPLISHMENT. Becoming a MAN is much more complicated process.

The funny thing is even in this day and age, most guys want to marry a women who respect her SEXUALITY. A guy doesn't like the idea of his future wife in the back seat with someone else, or her being the subject of a sexual conquest story in a locker room. They'll brag about the girls like that but they don't marry them. They want to marry a girl whether "SHE's NEVER DONE IT" or done it and regretted it, who recognizes that SEX speaks the language of FOREVER, COMMITTED LOVE…… someone like me.

But why would I want to marry someone like that…. Someone who want's to marry a virgin, but spend his dating years robbing other girls of their virginity so that they can prove their MANHOOD??? He's not a "REAL MAN" in my eyes, he's a selfish, immature by driven by insecurity, NOT LOVE. And I'm not interested.

I want more from YOU. I want YOU to respect your sexuality as much as I respect MINE. I want YOU to be a real, confident MAN, not a wimp has to use women to feed his insecurity. A GUY like that couldn't use all of those women, and then suddenly LOVE me. He must be "good in Bed" but "NOT in LOVING".

I want YOU to learn really to LOVE. Learning to LOVE is learning to put other first. A GUY who messes around outside of marriage isn't putting the good of the other first. He's using a girl…… speaking the body language of permanent commitment when the relationship isn't permanent. He's putting the girl at risk pregnancy. And he's putting himself at risk for some nasty diseases…… diseases he can then later give his wife. That's not MAKING LOVE. A real MAN LOVES A WOMEN- all women- and what's best for them. And he doesn't let his desires control his actions. He controls his desires instead.

I want YOU to develop self-control. That's important to me. I don't want to marry MAN who can't control himself. MEN like that make a LOUSY husbands. A GUY who isn't used of saying "NO" to SEX isn't going to be any better at 40 than he is 18. I've seen women who worry every time their husbands hire an attracted secretary. I don't want that. What kind of marriage could I have with someone I couldn't even trust on a business trip??

In the short run, I'm sure there aren't too many rewards for a GUY living this way. Society tells you what you're missing out on "SEXUAL PEAK". Your silence during the locker room bragging sessions can seem deafening. You may have even heard from the girls you date something must be wrong with you because you don't take them to bed. Deep down, you must know that having SEX won't prove you're a MAN. It's just irritating that no one else seems to know isn't it?

But somebody does know it. I know it. And in the end, I'm the only someone who matter. And no, I'm not narrow-minded as those GUYS who say they'll only marry a virgin. Society isn't too supportive of Virginity, especially MALE VIRGINITY. I can forgive mistakes in your past. But I'm interested in your future, starting now. When I met YOU, I want YOU to be a MAN who has made a conscious decision to wait….. out of LOVE for our FUTURE FAMILY and commitment to OUR MARRIAGE. And I want YOU to be a REAL MAN, who's develop the control, maturity and unselfishness that waiting brings. They may not be popular traits in the locker room but they're popular with me. They'll make you a better husband, and better father. To me that's SEXY.

I've abstained from Sex all these years, and it hasn't been for the lack of offers, I've plenty of opportunities, and saying "NO" isn't always been easy. I'm sure, it's not always easy for YOU, either. But it will make OUR MARRIAGE so much stronger. SEX will be our GIFT to each other, "OUR EXCLUSIVE LANGAUGE". It will belong to "US" not "US and everyone else we ever dated".

THANKS for waiting for ME. I PROMISE YOU WON'T REGRET IT!!!

 

 

---kcasey200kc----