Falling For A Therapist - Merged Thread

[btdeadlock]

you are the man! idol! too bad you were born in this monogamous-in name society, where the natural order of being polygamous is persecuted!

 

but why should men like you, have to hide?

 

Estrada, Revilla, Tan (to name a few)...are all polygamous! and being the patriarch, their families have to accept their lifestyles!

Sometimes, I think the reason guys like me have no girlfriends is because of guys like you who take more than your fair share.

Edited February 17, 2010 by btdeadlock

[Triad1465]

sobrang rare scenario un makatagpo ng ganitong girl, swerte na lang un mga guys na nakahanap ng mabait at totoo

[blow_gobi]

It's been 4 years now, she quit her work as model/GRO for good last year, and I lost her for 3 months (it was about this time last year when I posted how sad I was that she was no longer answering my calls and texts after being together for 3 years) after a well-off guest assiduously courted her and asked her to quit her job promising to take care of her. But we got back because the guy left her. It was more than what I had hoped for, kasi masaya na rin sana ako kahit na magkita lang kami paminsan minsan. Now I'm the one helping her out (partly though, because the other guy gave her a small business )kasi ayaw na niya talagang bumalik sa dati niyang trabaho.

 

I don't really care how this will end. Happy ending or not. I'll be there for as long as she needs me. She has given me good times, so giving her a decent treatment is my way of paying her back. She's a nice person so she doesn't deserve more hardships than she already has suffered and if I can do something about it, I'll do it for her sake. Sabi ko sa kanya, ang wish ko lang sana ay magyari din sa akin yung nangyari sa tatay ko, na nung tumanda at hanggang namatay yung tatay ko, at matagal na ding pumanaw ang nanay ko, yung babae niya ang umalalay sa kanya. Kaya kaming mga anak ay natanggap na rin at nagpasalamat pa doon sa babae niya. Pero OK lang kahit na hindi mangyari ito, wala naman talaga akong expectations na ganito.

[Rasc]

exactly true... when you expect something in return, iba na kasi ang ibig sabihin nun... kumbaga ginagawa mu lahat pero nagexpect ng kapalit... hindi pag mamahal yun... tama naman eh, hindi porket sa ganiton work hindi na natin respetuhin kung ano desisyon nila... dapat marunong din tayo makiramdam kung ano ang dapat, hindi yung pansariling kagustuhan...

[btdeadlock]

It's been 4 years now, she quit her work as model/GRO for good last year, and I lost her for 3 months (it was about this time last year when I posted how sad I was that she was no longer answering my calls and texts after being together for 3 years) after a well-off guest assiduously courted her and asked her to quit her job promising to take care of her. But we got back because the guy left her. It was more than what I had hoped for, kasi masaya na rin sana ako kahit na magkita lang kami paminsan minsan. Now I'm the one helping her out (partly though, because the other guy gave her a small business )kasi ayaw na niya talagang bumalik sa dati niyang trabaho.

For a moment there I almost thought we were in love with the same girl, but then I read some of the differences in our stories. But yeah, most of it sounds oh-so-familiar.

 

Dang, she just texted me a couple of hours ago asking how I was. She never did that after she left her job at the club. Now I'm going to find it difficult to sleep tonight since I'll probably be speculating as to why she contacted me after I gave her that letter. Did she need help but couldn't bring herself to ask? Did my letter touch her at some level? Or was she merely bored? Damn, I'm out of melatonin too.

[Stitch]

A friend once told me that it’s not wrong to fall in love, but remember that the reason they’re at that type of job is because that’s their bread and butter. If you are willing to take that away from them can you replace their source of income? If you can, good for you….

 

I personally don’t believe that just because that was their work that they would go back to it in times of desperation.

 

I myself feel in love once with an MPA, I have had GF’s that were models and pageant winners but I choose a girl who was true (not plastic). I go to clubs and bars but I just met girls who would just go for my looks or just my money. And have been hurt so many times.

 

The girl was someone I never expected I would meet in a place like that. I accepted the fact what her work was, but with this day and age. We meet girls and hookup into your bed but, I asked myself once. If sex is something physical and we pay to get this pleasure, what if we also get emotional and psychological pleasure (fun to be with) from them. So what’s the difference with meeting a girl in the mall and a girl in the MP or Bar? I agree in the previous post that we are also craving for emotional pleasure (a GFE experience for 1 hour and 20 min).

 

Sad to say I let the girl go, I know she’s retired and has now a business of her own. But I have no regrets loving her and helping her.

 

Just something I like to share....

[Rearden]

Sometimes, I think the reason guys like me have no girlfriends is because of guys like you who take more than your fair share.

 

hehehe! you'll have yours too sir!

 

just want to share, from a gene-centric perspective

 

1. our bodies are merely the carriers of the basic unit of life, the genes, and its main purpose is to propogate itself

2. genes evolved into two types, the sperm and the egg, where the sperms, are cheap, millions of it are created everyday, while the egg is rare, only 1 per month

3. while the cheap sperms main function is to fertilize the rare eggs, a man's best chance for the survival of his genes is to fertilize as much egg as possible, ergo natural selection has favoured polygamous men, hence the likes of Estrada, Revilla and Tan

4. since a woman only produces 1 egg per month, and once fertilized she has to carry it for 9 months inside her, stopping her monthly production of eggs, a woman's best strategy is to find the best man to copulate with, ergo women are more likely to choose an Estrada, Revilla, or Tan, even if they are wife number 2 or 3 or 4...and so on...("best men" being a strong male with the most resources, and in human terms, that is money!)

 

so, to those men (married or not), who are able to take care of their angel/s, bravo!

[blow_gobi]

hehehe! you'll have yours too sir!

 

just want to share, from a gene-centric perspective

 

1. our bodies are merely the carriers of the basic unit of life, the genes, and its main purpose is to propogate itself

2. genes evolved into two types, the sperm and the egg, where the sperms, are cheap, millions of it are created everyday, while the egg is rare, only 1 per month

3. while the cheap sperms main function is to fertilize the rare eggs, a man's best chance for the survival of his genes is to fertilize as much egg as possible, ergo natural selection has favoured polygamous men, hence the likes of Estrada, Revilla and Tan

4. since a woman only produces 1 egg per month, and once fertilized she has to carry it for 9 months inside her, stopping her monthly production of eggs, a woman's best strategy is to find the best man to copulate with, ergo women are more likely to choose an Estrada, Revilla, or Tan, even if they are wife number 2 or 3 or 4...and so on...("best men" being a strong male with the most resources, and in human terms, that is money!)

 

so, to those men (married or not), who are able to take care of their angel/s, bravo!

 

Ibig sabihin pala nito, pag nakapili na nung girl yung lalaki, wala nang paligoy ligoy, sa kama na ang tuloy, hindi na kailangan ng special seduction skills ni lalaki. :evil:

 

E paano naman kaya kung yung lalaki e may sufficient resources pero hindi nakakabuntis? So disappointed si girl pag hindi siya maanakan. Di ba sex is also meant to be enjoyed?

 

But it seems that the most important lesson in the above perspective is the that best way to a woman's heart (and keyhole) is to be perceived as being able to take care of her - physically (or sexually), emotionally and financially

Edited February 19, 2010 by blow_gobi

[kimura22]

hirap ng ganitong sitwasyon sobra.. di ako makatulog knowing na every night may ka-sex cya parang dinudurog yung puso ko...

[Stitch]

hirap ng ganitong sitwasyon sobra.. di ako makatulog knowing na every night may ka-sex cya parang dinudurog yung puso ko...

Bro I know how you feel, but why do you have to linger on something the ills you instead of turning your attention to more important things in your life? I know sobrang nakakainis yung sinasabing madaming babae dyan. But if you think of it totoo. Madami nga dyan na mas karapat dapat ng pagmamahal at oras mo regardless kung nag tratrabaho sa ganyan o hinde... Something to think about.

[Itto Ogami]

Bro I know how you feel, but why do you have to linger on something the ills you instead of turning your attention to more important things in your life? I know sobrang nakakainis yung sinasabing madaming babae dyan. But if you think of it totoo. Madami nga dyan na mas karapat dapat ng pagmamahal at oras mo regardless kung nag tratrabaho sa ganyan o hinde... Something to think about.

the heart is an uncontrollable beast.

you never know who it is going to choose...

[lankaface]

hirap ng ganitong sitwasyon sobra.. di ako makatulog knowing na every night may ka-sex cya parang dinudurog yung puso ko...

Doesnt it sometimes make you feel there is so much injustice in this world? And there are times you ask the question ''Bakit siya pa"? Ganun talaga ang mundo, maybe we just love to follow our heart kaya kakayanin nalang natin ang lahat.

[btdeadlock]

And there are times you ask the question ''Bakit siya pa"?

Normally yes, but not this time. I don't go clubbing, but a couple of years ago, I decided to learn the ropes. Out of the dozens of establishments in QC, I decided to go to one. Out of all the girls of that particular establishment, I chose one and I chose to just stick to that one girl, even though there was nothing stopping me from going to other clubs or choosing other girls. I chose to put myself in a situation where I could fall in love with a GRO because I thought I could choose not to fall in love. I was dead wrong on that last point. I can't blame God, fate, destiny, or karma for the situation I'm in, because clearly it was all my damn fault.

[kimura22]

Bro I know how you feel, but why do you have to linger on something the ills you instead of turning your attention to more important things in your life? I know sobrang nakakainis yung sinasabing madaming babae dyan. But if you think of it totoo. Madami nga dyan na mas karapat dapat ng pagmamahal at oras mo regardless kung nag tratrabaho sa ganyan o hinde... Something to think about.

hirap lalo na at nalaman ko regular pala siya ng mga tropa ko at mas nauna pa siya makuha ng mga friends ko... lose-lose situation eh kasi kung maging kami nga ang hirap nun kasi may nangyari na sa kanila ng mga friends ko tapos i know kung sakaling maging kami talaga dadating ang time na kelngan ko cya patigilin sa ganung job.. I gave her a lot of options..sabi ko kahit yung biz ko ibigay ko na sakanya at kakausapin ko yung mga kilala ko sa ads and modelling industry kasi maganda naman siya at pwede talaga pang-model..kaso talagang kuntento na daw siya sa ganung job at nag-eenjoy daw siya sa job niya so sa madaling sabi she's not there for the money anymore..i told her kung money ang reason why she's there madali ma-solusyonan yan eh I'm willing to provide kaso hindi na yata pera dahilan niya...

[StoicVampire]

What they say about these women is just partly true, but there are some that are forced into this trade due to undesirable circumstances. Remember tao rin sila, they also aspire for a happy ending rather than being stuck in this career. Some naman are thinking of their future and they know that age is their main asset (gusto ng mga maniac mga bata) and they dont want to waste their opportunity to make as much money as they can, while they still can. What you went through is the consequence of the relationship you are in. Thus, the warning given to you by our brothers in the thread are true and serious. Being in love and in control is a wonderful feeling but remember it is only felt in your world and not the outside world we all exist in. If you prefer to live in this situation then, ignore all these comments and dont react to them as not to create a fight. One more thing, a lot of the bragging people are all exaggerating only, dont beleive in everything they say.

 

bro, after contemplating and thinking about it for one week, tama ang sinasabi ninyong lahat. it's been two weeks now since i gave up. wala na ang galit ko sa kanya. i can focus now on my work (slightly) and feel a lot better now. kahit na ganun ang nangyari, marami akong natutunan. tama man o mali. di lang kasi maganda ang naging break up. if i will leave her, i want to do it with a peace of mind. alam nyo yun? yung gut feel na parang may mali sa break up?

[StoicVampire]

hirap ng ganitong sitwasyon sobra.. di ako makatulog knowing na every night may ka-sex cya parang dinudurog yung puso ko...

 

we have to live with it bro. di niya kagustuhan na ganun ang mangyari sa kanya. tama ang sinabi ng mga bro natin. you have to eat your pride and ego. kasi kung hindi, di mo alam baka sa bandang huli umuwi ka na lang na buto't balat. i dont want to sound harsh but it's reality that kicked in. we cannot live in a fantasy world forever (my gratitude to lankaface. hehe)......but try your best to win her bro. gawin mo lahat para sa kanya. pero wag mong kalimutan na magtira ka pa rin para sa sarili mo. ok? cheers!

[StoicVampire]

I don't know if I should post this here or in the other thread but here goes..... I wrote this one for her....

 

Ang buwan ay nakayuko at umiiyak

Pagtigil ng luha ay di tiyak

Inosenteng pag-ibig sa paraang payak

Ibinigay sa tao ang di nag-alinlangan at nasindak

 

Lamig ng gabi tumutulos sa pusong nabiyak at nananaghoy

Na hindi kayang supilin kahit init ng apoy

Damdaming iningatan, nalaglag at idinaloy

Nasayang na pagkakataon nais ibaon sa limot at pagtuloy

 

Mga ngiti sa labi nakita at nadama

Ninais gawing panghabambuhay nang ika'y kasama

Bakit lahat ng pagkakatao'y umiwas ka at di hinayaang itama

Ang buhay sa sana'y palaging maligaya

 

Sa pagtulog ko ang gabing ito ay aking iiwan

Ipipikit ang mata, isasara ang damdamin at isipan

Ako'y mananaginip kasama ka sa kawalan

At sa pagggising walang bahid ng naramdaman......

 

:closedeyes:

[Rasc]

ginawan mu ng tula ah, sya ba yung tamad magtxt? well mas maganda talaga pag wala tayong galit sa puso...

 

ako nga eh hanggang ngayon hindi ko pa alam ang gagawin, hindi pa naman ako nagtapat sa kanya... parang im just here for you... parang ganun lang yung situation ko...

 

tama naman siguro yung gamitin ang puso para alagaan ang mahal natin, at gamitin ang utak para alagaan ang sarili natin... kaya yun ang ginagawa ko ngayon... kahit

 

masaya man or hindi maganda ang kinalabasan... atleast nakilala ko sya... hindi naman kasi ako humihingi ng kapalit... kasi yung konting oras nya na nakatuon sa akin ay

 

sapat na yun... hindi na lang puro trabaho at stress araw-araw, lahat naman kasi tayo may karapatang sumaya, ilagay lang nga tama, upang hindi makasakit or makasagasa

 

ng iba...

[btdeadlock]

Damn. The boards are as slow as molasses tonight.

 

Anyway guys, I need your help. To save some backreading, I quoted some of my old posts below. Updates are below the quotes.

 

The first year that I took her wasn't because of attraction. It was out of guilt. I wish I could say more but lets leave it at that. Later on, it was starting to feel like an obligation. She would call me up asking if I would come over and I would drag myself over to the club even if I didn't feel like it. Through all that time, we never flirted with each other. I never gave any her indication that I was trying to get into her pants nor was she affectionate towards me (at least most of the time). What I didn't realize was that I was slowly falling for her, and when I did realize it, it was too late.

Last Wednesday, I wrote her a letter finally telling her how I felt attached to a Valentine's gift. I planned to give it to her this Valentine's, but certain unfortunate events (which would take too long to narrate) somewhat forced my hand. In the letter I told her how I fell for her, how much she inspired me by leaving the club to start her own small business, and how I'd always be there for her even if I knew she was already in love with someone else.

 

I wrote that letter because my brain kept telling me, "She found her happy ending. Now stop bothering her and move on with your life." But my gut keeps telling the odds that she has a future with her boyfriend are slim. From what I could gather, he's the only son of a wealthy Chinese family and works for the family business. Now, I'm probably guilty of stereotyping the Chinese, but I think that's an uphill battle for them right there.

 

I know how much she loves the guy, and I hope he fights for her, because if he doesn't, she's going to be seriously hurt. I wish them the best. But I'd be lying if I said there wasn't a part of me wishing they would break up so I can get my chance at making up for all that time I spent with her doing nothing.

Dang, she just texted me a couple of hours ago asking how I was. She never did that after she left her job at the club. Now I'm going to find it difficult to sleep tonight since I'll probably be speculating as to why she contacted me after I gave her that letter. Did she need help but couldn't bring herself to ask? Did my letter touch her at some level? Or was she merely bored? Damn, I'm out of melatonin too.

Now for the update...

 

By the way, as a way of referring to the girl I'm after, I'll be referring to her as MD.

 

Feb 19 - MD's sister (whom I'll refer to as 'Ate') who also works as a GRO at another club informs me that she received a text from MD saying that she and her boyfriend / former guest broke up. Considering they've had quarrels before, I just chalked it up as another LQ and that they'll make up in no time. It does, however, explain the text message I received the previous day.

 

Feb 20 - I receive a tip from someone (who shall remain anonymous) that MD was going to be going to Ate's workplace alone, most likely to have some drinks with her. The tipster said I should get my butt over there right away. She was there alone alright. I went up behind her and whispered in her ear if I could buy her a drink. She was surprised to see me. I asked her if she was alone but she told me she texted one of her old guests to meet her at the club. She said she was contemplating working as a GRO again for about a month.

 

I managed to talk to her for about an hour before her guest and his friends arrived. She attended to her guests and I decided stay stay around and wait for her in case she needed a ride home. While waiting I heard the DJ say something that I wasn't really paying attention to until he said, "To (my name) from Princess (her name)" Damn. Now I'll have to ask her what she told the DJ to say. Around an hour later, I got the surprised when she appeared onstage doing her usual dance routine she used to do in her former club. It seems she decided to audition right there and then. I asked the manager about her show and he said she's planning to start working next month. I also asked the manager if he got the name of MD's guest. He told me and I recognized guest as MD's now ex-boyfriend's main rival for her affections back at her old club.

 

I waited around closing time and managed to talk to Ate. I offered them a ride home but Ate said she had one and would be bringing MD home and probably offer a shoulder to cry on in the process. I went home after that.

 

 

 

And that's where I am now.

 

 

 

Well, I wanted a second shot and looks like this is it, and it seems I'm not as high up on her list as I thought I was, if at all. Part of me is thinking I'm setting myself up for a much bigger heartbreak, but part of me thinks that I'm really going to regret it if I don't at least fight for her. It's so difficult to think right now so I'm left with doing what my heart tells me to, and I think that may not be a good thing.

[greenman24]

Head over heart. I had one before...June 2009 she was my regular...i know she had others...but the time spent with her was an exception...talk about life...her plans...her relationships...i helped her many times...one time she was sick...she can't work I have to spend something for her...and sex after that was wonderful...i know that the feeling is not real...last time we met was Dec.18 although mentioned to me one time of a person so insistent...Feb. 7...went to the place where she works...their Tita told me she got married...i hope she is not pregnant if she is well...only her can tell who the father is...i do not feel bad...i feel happy for her...YOU SHOULD DO THE SAME...BE HAPPY!

[Itto Ogami]

Well, I wanted a second shot and looks like this is it, and it seems I'm not as high up on her list as I thought I was, if at all. Part of me is thinking I'm setting myself up for a much bigger heartbreak, but part of me thinks that I'm really going to regret it if I don't at least fight for her. It's so difficult to think right now so I'm left with doing what my heart tells me to, and I think that may not be a good thing.

 

para sa yo, kapatid...

 

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.

 

-Anon*

_____________________________________________

*attribution is most welcome

 

i have to admire you for going through with a losing battle.

i guess what's important is you're gonna go through it with a level head and little expectation.

good luck! :thumbsupsmiley:

[lankaface]

bro, after contemplating and thinking about it for one week, tama ang sinasabi ninyong lahat. it's been two weeks now since i gave up. wala na ang galit ko sa kanya. i can focus now on my work (slightly) and feel a lot better now. kahit na ganun ang nangyari, marami akong natutunan. tama man o mali. di lang kasi maganda ang naging break up. if i will leave her, i want to do it with a peace of mind. alam nyo yun? yung gut feel na parang may mali sa break up?

Move on pare, there is always a better person that will come your way, What seems to be less to another might be the better one for you and vice versa. Kaya walang katapusan ang cycle kung sino ang mas higit. Edited February 22, 2010 by lankaface

[bpc_dnd]

Well, I wanted a second shot and looks like this is it, and it seems I'm not as high up on her list as I thought I was, if at all. Part of me is thinking I'm setting myself up for a much bigger heartbreak, but part of me thinks that I'm really going to regret it if I don't at least fight for her. It's so difficult to think right now so I'm left with doing what my heart tells me to, and I think that may not be a good thing.

 

Wow, you are really into the girl. You are in a very difficult position wherein you dont even know if the girl really loves you, yet you want to carry on with it (courting and loving her)..... I admire you for that but i hope you have prepared yourself to endure pain because that is a very bumpy road if you ask me sir.....

[blow_gobi]

Well, I wanted a second shot and looks like this is it, and it seems I'm not as high up on her list as I thought I was, if at all. Part of me is thinking I'm setting myself up for a much bigger heartbreak, but part of me thinks that I'm really going to regret it if I don't at least fight for her. It's so difficult to think right now so I'm left with doing what my heart tells me to, and I think that may not be a good thing.

 

Just be around in case her 2nd choice doesn't work out, or eventually end also in a break-up. In which case, you might reach the top of her list. But don't raise your hopes too high. Someone could sneak into that list and be ranked higher than you.

 

So why don't you play the field in the meantime? Who knows, you might find someone better than her who might also be reciprocating your affection. Good luck

Edited February 22, 2010 by blow_gobi

[btdeadlock]

Head over heart. I had one before...June 2009 she was my regular...i know she had others...but the time spent with her was an exception...talk about life...her plans...her relationships...i helped her many times...one time she was sick...she can't work I have to spend something for her...and sex after that was wonderful

At least you had sex. I've never been that lucky.

 

Wow, you are really into the girl. You are in a very difficult position wherein you dont even know if the girl really loves you, yet you want to carry on with it (courting and loving her)..... I admire you for that but i hope you have prepared yourself to endure pain because that is a very bumpy road if you ask me sir.....

No illusions there. I know she's not in love with me. As I said, I didn't do anything to win her affection for a year and a half. I only realized I was feeling something for her six months ago. I only started doing something about it 4 months ago. I only told her how I felt about her 2 weeks ago. It would be unrealistic of me to think she'd suddenly feel the same way towards be just because she broke up with her boyfriend / guest.

 

I know she's not in love with me. What I don't know is if I have a chance. I won't know until I try.

 

Just be around in case her 2nd choice doesn't work out, or eventually end also in a break-up. In which case, you might reach the top of her list. But don't raise your hopes too high. Someone could sneak into that list and be ranked higher than you.

 

So why don't you play the field in the meantime? Who knows, you might find someone better than her who might also be reciprocating your affection. Good luck

There two things about her "2nd choice". At first I wondered why she didn't call me to join her at the club, but then I realized she was there to drown her sorrows in alcohol, and I don't drink. This could all be her way of making her boyfriend jealous. Funny thing is that when she was still working, her boyfriend would get jealous if she had other guests except me. He considered me safe because he never saw me lay a hand on her.

 

The other thing is that her "2nd choice" is also Chinese. While she was waiting for him and his friends to arrive, she asked me if I was Chinese. I don't know why she asked that. She knows I only look Chinese. Again I apologize if I'm stereo-typing the Chinese.

 

So yeah, I could win by default. And I agree, nothing's stopping someone else from walking into her life right now, including her boyfriend. That's why I have to improve my game. Only problem is I'm not a player. I really wish I knew how to play the field.