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shhhhhh

[12] EXALTED
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Posts posted by shhhhhh

    Song Lyrics

    in Music

    Posted

    Beauty and Madness
    Over there, just beneath the moon
    There's a man with a burden to keep
    Now sleep will fall, washout, rags and
    Paperbags, homes and lives passing by
    Who will see the beauty in your life,
    And who will be there to hear you when you call.
    Who will see the madness in your life, and who
    Will be there to catch you if you fall.
    Dreams run wild, as lovers find their way
    Through the night. not a care in the world.
    And over there, oh the twinkling of the lights
    Harbour lights. say goodnight one more time.

    Writings of the Heart

    in Matters of the heart

    Posted

    You know, it has been how many months and I haven’t forgotten about you. Not even once.

    I thought I could get over you now that you’re far away, but I guess I held on.

    I chose to wait for you even though I know deep inside, what I’m doing only makes me more of an idiot.

    I chose to remember all the hardships, and instead of forgetting about them, they became my reason to continue chasing you.

    I keep thinking “What if he actually did like me?” “Should I just give up?” “Why can’t I give up on you?” “Am I stupid enough to accept the truth and still fight?” “Was there never a chance?”

     

    So many questions, but not once have I received an answer.

    I want answers because maybe they would help me move on.

    But I can’t ask. I can’t know. Because I’m afraid that I’d get hurt more than I already am.

    I’m scared that I’d still choose you despite everything.

    I’m scared of what would happen next after finding out the truth.

    I’m not even sure if I would actually be happy that I would finally be able to let go.

     

    As much as I would like to blame you and your mixed signals, I can’t.

    Because it’s not your fault right? It’s all my fault. It was always my fault, am I right?

    Wrong. If only you told me the truth from the beginning, I wouldn’t have gotten close.

    I would have been able to stop myself from falling for you even more.

    I would have been able to prevent the heartache and awkwardness that came after finding out the truth.

    I would have not cried myself to sleep. I would not have bothered you and tried my best to convey my feelings.

    But, I admit, I am also to blame for a lot of things.

    I know that there was no chance, still, I gave every ounce of effort that I can offer.

    I wrote letters even though I shouldn’t have.

    I admitted my feelings despite the fact that they would probably just be neglected, ignored, or even thrown away.

    I allowed myself to know you more. And in the end, look where that got me.

     

    We’re both at fault. But, why do feel like I’m the only who made a mistake?

    Why is it that every time I talk to you, I feel like I’m annoying you?

    Why is that every time I try to get close, you walk farther away from me?

    Why is that every time I make an effort, I feel like the distance between us is just growing?

    Am I supposed to feel this way?

    Is this a punishment for breaking the hearts of others? If it were, then I guess I deserve it. Despite that, it still hurts.

    It hurts to move on, and then realize that I can’t.

    It hurts to keep going forward, then suddenly get pulled back.

    It hurts to like someone who appreciates my effort, but still can’t seem to feel the same way.

    It hurts to see you happy even though I know that you should be.

    It hurts to know that you’re sad and I can’t even do anything about it.

    It hurts that I still want to get close even though I know it’s impossible.

    It freakin’ hurts, you damn idiot. And to make things worse, I still like you despite the pain that I feel.

    Is this pain a sign that I should just give up? Am I really ready to throw away the two years of waiting?

    Is it really not worth it like I thought it would be?

    -from Thought Catalog
    :(
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