SunakoNakahara

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Okay po ba ang weather on 1st-2nd week of february sa taipei? (Looking forward to experience snow and cherry blossom at the same time if that’s possible) Mura na po ba ang 8k roundtrip? (travel tax, insurance and +baggage not included) And honest answer pls, mas okay ba magsolo joiner sa mga group tours offered sa fb groups? Or DIY nalang? Solo female traveller here. (2nd solo travel ko ito if ever)

It’s always a sin, something i never expected na magagawa ko way back 2020. Judge me, cancel me, kayong bahala. Iniyakan ko din yun, kasi gusto ko sya pero paano ko sasabihin na hindi ko alam kung sinong tatay nya. Na nabuo sya kasi sa nature of work ng nanay nya. Therapist pa ako that time, palagi namang may cd. Never ako pumayag ng wala. August 2020, my period didn’t came. Sabi ko pa to myself, siguro dahil sa sudden change sa lifestyle since i started keto diet, work out plus i quit smoking. But september already passed. Wala parin. Plus ang lala na ng hairfall at breakout ko. That’s when I decided to see an OB gyne kasi feeling ko may PCOS ako. (Symptoms eh). Tinanong pa ako kung nag Preg test naba ako, so nag test pa ako. Dalawang test, positive. 😭 ayoko maniwala kaya nag ie(internal examination) pa si Doc, and ayun nga meron daw talagang nasa loob. Ang condoms daw pwedeng mag overflow or nabutas. So nagpa-trans v ako, and ayun, may heartbeat na. 🥹 1month+ sya based dun sa results. Ewan ko, parang may saya naman akong nafeel doon sa heartbeat part, pero may mali, may takot. Umuwi ako sa apartment, then yung friend ko na therapist din suggested na iabort ko daw kasi bata pa ako, wag na daw ako gumaya sa kanya. Single mom sya. Hindi naman ako agad nag agree, pero napag isip isip ko rin na baka may point siya. So ayun, tinulungan nya ako. First try ng meds, hindi ko sure if nawala na sya. 2weeks past, nagtry ako magpa transv ulit, ewan ko sa sarili ko bakit may part of me parin na parang sinasabi “sana nandyan kapa.” And ayun, may heartbeat parin siya. Umuwi ako sa apartment then yung therapist ulit na kasama ko, I told her na “ituloy ko nalang ate, Kasi kumapit sya e. Gusto nya mabuhay.” Pero ayun, pinayuhan nya na naman ako ng mga life experiences nya as a single mom and since nagtake na daw ako ng abortion pill nung una, possible daw na may effect na yun sa baby. Again, na convince nya ako na mag 2nd attempt. At doon na sya tuluyang lumabas. 🥲 sobrang liit parang thumb size, tapos yung form nya parang naka thumb suck. 😭 Nasaktan din ako sa ginawa ko at hanggang ngayon pinagbabayaran ko yon. (Everytime may nangyayaring hindi maganda sa buhay ko, every failure ko, bawat pangttraydor na nararanasan ko sa mga tao sa friendship, sa relasyon, sa negosyo. naiisip ko lahat yon karma ko.) blessed ako sa malaking part ng buhay ko ngayon pero parang lagi na ko may kakambal na downfall. may 3yrs old na sana ako ngayon. At alam kong makapal ang mukha ko kung hihilingin ko na sana ngayon nalang sya dumating sa buhay ko. Ngayon na kaya ko na sya palakihin ng kahit ako lang. ngayon na hndi na therapist ang mama. 🥺 ngayon na may malaki ng ipon si mama. 🥺

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i miss the innocence of loving someone wholeheartedly without the constant fear of them hurting you.

My lolo from our province passed away yesterday. (yeah yesterday pa, wala lang me gana mag phone kahapon) it’s sad. Last birthday nya na pala nung april, sana hndi na ako tinamad sa 5hrs drive 😭 sorry

Manila

Panama

Miss ko na magmahal hahahaha charot

Eat a lot. 😭

“Nangangagat ba aso mo?”

My dog bitten a visitor last night. Sinamahan ko yung nakagat sa clinic and I spent 6k anti tetanus and anti rabies shot for 4 session, then erig. Plus 500 na pampalubag loob kasi nakakahiya rin kahit complete vaccine at malinis ang dog. Hays araw araw hotdog sa airfryer nalang ulam ko hahaha.

I miss going to school. 🙃 gusto ko mag college, pero iniisip ko yung point e im earning good amount naman na. Plus baka di kayanin ng oras ko so ayun. Hays

Mag golf

7,777,863,947

Kenji and Nami 🐶

I’m currently living alone (2years++). Enjoying my freedom, privacy, peace and big space for me and my dogs.❤️