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How can a cheater stop cheating


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#1 nolem_blckhrt

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Posted 11 February 2014 - 02:25 PM

How can a cheater, stop cheating?

I know a lot have done it. But I think a lot more are having a hard time doing it. The question refers to how to stop cheating before things seriously get out of hand.

How can you dismiss the thought of a kiss, a smooch, a conversation with a potential lead.

#2 grishamist

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Posted 11 February 2014 - 02:51 PM

There's a saying a cheater is always be a cheater but I guess this is the hardest question on our part.

Maybe the greatest advice on this one is dealing with yourself, refurbished yourself to be satisfied with a person, it's kinda hard to do that but you need to ask yourself, when is the right time for me to feel the satisfaction? Do I need to rebuilt myself to stay on that line, to be consistent.

#3 Edmund Dantes

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Posted 11 February 2014 - 05:19 PM

Para sakin its all about learning the hard way.

Lahat ng lalakeng kilala ko, mayabang sa una at akala hindi mahuhuli. Sabi ko nga, pag masaya at nasasarapan ka sa ginagawa mo lahat nagiging tama. Meron kasi talagang hindi marunong magtanda hangang hindi nila nakikita consequences ng ginagawa nila. Ang sabi nga, nasa huli naman lagi ang pagsisisi. Minsan kasi ang isang bagay na bulok, kahit tabunan mo talagang sisingaw at sisingaw pa din.

Then yung taong mahal mo mawawala na sayo, tapos yung mga anak mo mawawalan na din ng respeto sayo, at the end of the day you are all alone, and no matter what you do or how hard you try, mahirap ng ibalik yung dating nawalang tiwala.

Matuto ka man, huli na lahat.

#4 johnhoya29

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Posted 11 February 2014 - 06:22 PM

Kailangan ba umamin?

Siguro oo, dun magsisimula yung proseso ng paghinto.

In my case, I choose not to unveil the things I've done in the past, and believe me, napakarami.

Siguro makasarili, pero, ayaw ko siyang saktan kung malalaman niya pa. Mas mabuti nang ayusin ko talaga sarili ko na lang tas from there, sapat na siguro yon.

#5 cutebrian

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Posted 11 February 2014 - 07:22 PM

Problem with repenting is that it only last for months or even a year... but then flesh always wins.. kpg nakakita ng maganda at bata ayun diskarte kgd.. :(

#6 nosyaj_nozar

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Posted 11 February 2014 - 11:41 PM

Mahirap talaga. Hindi naman naging madali ang pagbabago kahit kailan, lalo sa bagay na natural mong nagagawa or ginagawa. Natigilan ko noon, dahil muntik ng malaman ng babaeng mahal ko. Natakot ako noon na mawala siya sa akin kaya pinagsikapan kong labanan ang mga tukso noon. Pero ngayon, ginagawa ko nanaman ulit. Hindi ako nahuli noon, at hindi pa din ako nahuhuli ngayon. Ang hirap nga talaga nito. Sa mga nakapagbago, saludo ako sa inyo. (",)

#7 Edmund Dantes

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Posted 12 February 2014 - 09:19 AM

Talagang karamihan kasi, hindi magbabago hangang hindi nagtatanda. Kung baga kelangan maospital pa muna ang magkasakit sa atay bago tigilan ang paginom eh.

Masarap ang bawal, at hangang hindi ka naman nahuhuli sige ka lang. O kaya naman pwedeng yung number 2 mo, may nahahanap ka dun na wala sa legal GF/Wife mo.

Siguro, ito na lang imaginin natin sa mga pwedeng mangyari

Makakakakuha ka ng sakit

Mawawala yung taong totoong mahal mo, at di ka na papapatwarin

Madedemanda ka (lalo kung babae, pwede kang makulong ng adultery)

Magkakagulo pamilya nyo

Mawawalan respeto sayo mga anak mo

O yung number 2 mo, pwedeng gawin sayo ginawa sa legal GF mo

Puwede din naman yung legal GF mo itorotot ka (masakit ito sa lalake)

Basta mga katoto, tandaan na lang kasi natin na ang pagsisisi, wala yan sa umpisa o sa gitna, laging nasa huli.



Isa pa sigurong pwede mo gawin kung talagang palikero ka, huwag ka makipagrelasyon ng seryoso kung tingin mo yung partner mo hindi maibigay lahat ng gusto mo sa relasyon. Ako ganun eh. Kung makikiparelasyon ako, gusto ko yung taong wala na akong hahanapin pa.

#8 nolem_blckhrt

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Posted 12 February 2014 - 05:03 PM

@johnhoya29, di ka naman nahuli pre, kaya pwede ka umamin haha. pag nahuli lang hindi aamin. Ako guilty ako. Napag isip isip ako. nahihirapan kasi ako kung pano ako didiskarte at lalayo, kasi nga alam mo na kung pano ang ikot ng mga bagay na ganyan. Gaya ng sabi ng iba, panahon lang binibilang mo, uulit at uulit ka pa rin.

Magulo kung sasabihin ko na natatakot akong mawala ang mas importante sakin, pero uulit ako. Kahit ako naguguluhan dun, pero pag nasa sitwasyon ka na, minsan iba un resulta. Ppde mo ipaalala lagi sa sarili mo un rason mo, pero siguro dapat nag eebolb ang rason mo para hindi natatalo

@Edmund, Medyo mahirap makuha un gusto mo, pare, sa huli mong sinabi. may kulang talaga, walang "We've got it all" gaya sa SM. Lahat may mali, walang perpekto. Sa umpisa siguro hindi mo makikita ang mga pagkukulang ng ka-relasyon mo, syempre umpisa. Pag tumagal tagal na, at lumabas na ang mga ugali nyo talaga, doon na magkakaalaman. Hindi naman ppwede na hiwalayan mo lagi dahil may nakita kang mali, tatanda kang binata nun.

Sa mga babaero at lalakero, sinasabi nyo ba sa mga kapartner nyo ang mali nila? ang hinahanap nyo sa iba? gaano nyo kadalas sinasabi ito? tuwing kelan nyo sakanya pinapaalala to? nagagawan naman ba ng paraan?

At para sa mismong naghanap ng iba, nagagawa nyo ba lagi na ipaalala sa sarili nyo ang mga mawawala sainyo pag tinuloy nyo ang paghahanap ng iba? Matinding "Mental conditioning" yan.

#9 Edmund Dantes

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Posted 12 February 2014 - 05:58 PM

@Edmund, Medyo mahirap makuha un gusto mo, pare, sa huli mong sinabi. may kulang talaga, walang "We've got it all" gaya sa SM. Lahat may mali, walang perpekto. Sa umpisa siguro hindi mo makikita ang mga pagkukulang ng ka-relasyon mo, syempre umpisa. Pag tumagal tagal na, at lumabas na ang mga ugali nyo talaga, doon na magkakaalaman. Hindi naman ppwede na hiwalayan mo lagi dahil may nakita kang mali, tatanda kang binata nun.

Sa mga babaero at lalakero, sinasabi nyo ba sa mga kapartner nyo ang mali nila? ang hinahanap nyo sa iba? gaano nyo kadalas sinasabi ito? tuwing kelan nyo sakanya pinapaalala to? nagagawan naman ba ng paraan?


Syempre wala naman perpektong babae o lalake sa mundo, Pero hindi naman impossible makahanap ka ng partner na completely satisfied ka na. Compatibility issues lang naman kasi yan. Kaya nga dahan dahan talaga dapat pag naguumpisa ng isang relasyon. At kung sa huli saka lumabas yung masamang ugali nung tao, at tingin mo dahil dyan ayaw mo na sa kanya, mas mabuting hiwalayan mo na agad lalo kung naguumpisa ka na makaramdam ng tukso. Mas mabuti na yun kesa naman lokohin mo pa di ba? Nga lang pwede mo pa din pagsisihan huli disisyon na yan lalo kung talagang sex lang habol mo dun sa pinagpalit mo.

Isa pa sigurong pwede is baguhin mo talaga lifestyle mo. Umiwas ka na sa mga tao at lugar na makakapagdala lang sayo ng tukso. Sabi nga, ang mga ganitong klase ng problema madali pumasok pero mahirap lusotan

#10 *Jessie*

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Posted 16 February 2014 - 02:17 AM

I appreciate that at some point, one has a will not to stop but to try not to stop. Maybe it's nothing different from drug addiction, alcohol or even gambling. I empathize with those who acknowledge the idea of stopping. But can they? I accept that they want to but they can not. I'd rather be surprised and admire one's will than hope too much. We are human. We do have our own "inclination". And if cheating may be one of them, then so be it.

But yes, lets try to give ourselves some glimpse of hope. These are what I have in mind.

1. Identify the reasons of cheating. The best way to treat an illness is to treat the root cause and not just the manifestations.

2. Understand and gradually embrace things that really matter. Things that may be compromised with cheating are sometimes the ones that feel like almost a lifetime to gain. Keep it as a constant reminder.

3. Accept that theres always a temptation everywhere but that doesnt mean you will give in or be affected by its existence.

#11 scam

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Posted 16 February 2014 - 09:14 AM

It all boils down to the individual as to how much he/she can control so as not to cheat.
If you want to control, just mind set your self by thinking the negative of it. Like :

1. Kawawa naman gf/wife /husband/bf ko kung gagawin ko ito.
2. May sakit itong nakakahawa kung itutuloy ko.

Things like that you set into your mind just to reverse the excitement/interest.

#12 kimB3RLy

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Posted 16 February 2014 - 09:58 AM

I had a 5 year relationship with a cheater... I learned that once a cheater, he will always be one. Second chances are worth giving but never third, fourth and so on....if you love yourself, you won't live in the misery of being the cheated half. You deserve to be happy. And it is also not a recourse to cheat back. Don't step down to their level. They are just not worth the love, time and effort which could have been for someone who would love and respect you and never will cheat on you...

#13 hottie22

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Posted 26 March 2014 - 08:12 PM

kapag nakahanap sila ng katapat!

#14 number1fan

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Posted 26 March 2014 - 09:26 PM

He / She can't... you can't expect a snake to act like a sheep.
  • ReDBaByBuRn likes this

#15 Nightwriter

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Posted 10 April 2014 - 01:46 AM

READ THIS: Lorena Bobbitt







( if anyone wants to know who she is, go check her out on Google)

Edited by nightwriter, 10 April 2014 - 01:47 AM.


#16 borntobewild_99

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Posted 13 April 2014 - 06:06 PM

Depende what type of cheating. kung relationship or fling pwede matigil yan pero di mo kelangan sabihin, dapat may pagkukusa.

pero kung mga ninja moves sa mp, spa, club, bar. medyo malabo yta mapigilan yun. siguro kung ala ng budget. 😁

#17 Hanzo Hattori

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Posted 14 April 2014 - 01:06 PM

self determination lng sagot nyan, it must happen from the inside, from within....

#18 jgc813

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Posted 16 April 2014 - 02:10 PM

There are two sides to this cheating phenomenon: one is the cheater, and the other side is the partner of the cheater.

There are times, the partner of the cheater doesn't know that s/he is a no. 2, or, a 'side dish' of the cheater. If s/he doesn't know that the other side is cheating on his/her spouse or significant other, then, s/he may feign responsibility.

How about if s/he DOES know? Doesn't that make him/her a cheater as well? S/he may be free (single), but with a knowledge that his/her other half is cheating changes the rules of the game.

Many have already stated the principles. I don't think anyone in the game of cheating can deny they do not know what is right or wrong. Of course, they do, but the cheating has taken a better hold of them. There's always the thrill, the rush, the pleasure of trying out someone/something new and different, the escape from boredom or misery, etc.

There are people who outgrow cheating. There's an expression in Filipino which goes "pinagsawaan na rin niya ang pagkabinata niya," applies to men, of course. Somehow, one has to admit that in our culture, being a single male has its own share of exploring and experimenting, and gives one the license to a life of debauchery. Hence, getting hitched or married means "malagay na sa tahimik." (Kinda weird, if you ask me.)

But there are people who just don't outgrow cheating. And, there are countless reasons why men and women cheat.

How can a cheater stop? I guess it would really depend on his/her own determination and willingness, that is, if the individual finally decides to live the placid life -- translated: lumagay sa tahimik. Other than that, it's either the cheater may have some form of pathological/psychological deficiency, OR s/he just cannot control his/her libido.

Edited by jgc813, 16 April 2014 - 02:13 PM.


#19 chairmanofdabored

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Posted 27 April 2014 - 10:50 PM

How can a cheater, stop cheating? They can't it is in their nature... It's like asking an addict stop being an addict.

#20 wife on call

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Posted 28 April 2014 - 08:41 AM

Pag nakarma na.




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