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Writings of the Heart


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Dear Paddington Bear,

 

Can you please give me a second chance? Can we start all over again please? You just don't have an idea that what happened yesterday (during our convo) makes me really sad and i'm hurt at the same time :( I am sincere when about being friends with you again.. hoping we coul talk personally about what happened. AND i'm hoping you get to read this...

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For the longest time, I didn’t believe anyone when they said, “It gets better.” Now I’ve been in plenty of awful relationships, and unfortunately a few toxic ones. But this one wasn’t bad at all. Actually, it was incredible, I had never been happier, and we had so much left to do together which is why it surprised me when it ended. I didn’t know how or why, and I definitely did not expect it. It’s absolutely true that the most painful goodbyes are the ones that are never said or never explained. I never thought I’d get over this, but I’m making progress every day.

 

At first, I won’t deny that it hurt so bad. I wasn’t myself. I was heartless and cruel, but someone once told me to never become the person that hurt you. And sometimes it’s very hard to get over a broken heart. The hardest part is remembering how you were before it, and going back to that. But I can genuinely now say that I am OK again.

 

After we ended, I felt so worthless, unnecessary, and unwanted. But I’ve learned a lot since this breakup, you know. I’ve learned to be alone. After all, you are the best company in the world for yourself, and I have finally seen that. I’ve started spending more time with the person in the mirror instead of focusing on everyone else. Because no one else can help you but you sometimes.

 

Life isn’t what you thought it would be when you enter your twenties. You thought it would be full of cool kids and sweet boyfriends that will kiss you goodnight on the first date. Life offers you a whirlwind adventure of broken hearts and screaming and fighting and kissing and nights where you can’t sleep thinking of how everything is happening. So, therefore, I’ve also learned that no matter how sad or broken you are inside out, that doesn’t justify not wanting to live. Life is more than just a bad heartbreak. It’s glorious and magnificent and wonderful all at once.

 

Thank you for being a part of my life .

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You changed me on such a deep ,emotional level that I don't even have the proper words to thank you. You had no idea you were doing it,either.The best thing you ever did for me was force to open up after being hurt before,and give me no choice but to grow as an individual.

 

I will be forever grateful for that. You've opened up my eyes. You make me one to believe in everything all over again-love songs , soulmates, cheesy romantic gestures. You helped make me feel beautiful, intelligent and most of all, capable of anything. The confidence you gaved me allowed me,for once and for all, to be myself and be comfortable in doing so.

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Salamat

 

 

Salamat sa iyo

Salamat sa maykapal

Salamat sa bagong umaga

Salamat sa mga biyaya

Salamat sa pagpunas ng aking luha

Salamat sa pagbigay sa akin ng bagong liwanag

Salamat sa pagbuo ulit ng aking tiwala

Salamat sa pagbuo ulit ng aking pagkatao

Salamat sa pagdating mo

Salamat sa mga patawa

Salamat ha !

 

Muli mong binigyan ng liwanag ang aking madilim na kahapon ...

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Tanong

 

 

Maraming umiikot

Maraming sumasagi

Maraming tumatakbo

Maraming hindi maintindihan

Maraming hindi maipaliwanag

Maraming hindi masagot

Maraming palaisipan

 

Ito ay tanong

Mga katanungang hindi ko masagot sa aking isipan

Mga katanungan tila ngpaoabigat ng aking damdamin

Mga katanungang hindi masambit

Mga katanungang may dulot na hapdi at kirot sa aking pagkatao

Mga katanungang tila ba bugtong na mahirap sagutin

 

Katanungang ayaw itanong pagkat

Takot akong ikay mawala sa aking buhay

Pagkat aking lumbay

Ikaw lang ang pumupukaw ...

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  • 3 weeks later...

Coming over in my direction

So thankful for that, it's such a blessin', yeah

Turn every situation into Heaven, yeah

Oh, you are my sunrise on the darkest day

Got me feelin' some kind of way

Make me wanna savor every moment slowly, slowly

You fit me tailor-made, love, how you put it on

Got the only key, know how to turn it on

The way you nibble on my ear,

The only words I wanna hear

Baby, take it slow so we can last long

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I wake up every morning knowing that there will be a sweet romantic text from you on my phone. My days start with you and end with you. And in between them, there exists only one thing – LOVE!

 

God has blessed me with so many things in life but the most beautiful blessing has been you. The love and care you have given me all these past few weeks is something that can only be compared with heaven. I will love you till my last breath.

 

 

I know that when I am older, I will look back at the days when we used to argue about petty things and I will be happy, knowing that our love was stronger and bigger than those things. You need to know that I am thankful that you are in my life and that I will love you till the day I die. Unconditionally and without any end, I love you, baby!

 

You know you’ve completely changed my life, in every way inside and out. When everything wasn’t in my favor you stepped in and made everything better for me and unconditionally changed myself with lots of positivity. I love you so much and if any day I have to sacrifice my life for you than I possibly do. You make my heart beat faster than ever. I love the way how you take care of me. Those make my day and all your activity makes my heart just melts to love with you.

 

 

I tell you this everyday, but you are the most beautiful person I know, inside and out and I see that more clearly with each passing day. I love everything about you, about us. You do something to me that no other has, you have made me so happy, the happiest I’ve ever been. You give me the most amazing feelings inside and its been exciting and just pure bliss. I’ve never met someone that was so good for me, and made me want them to this extent. Now that we’re together my smile never fades anymore, you’ve got me enthused about life and the little things it has to offer.

 

I love you entirely with all my heart. Through thick and thin, we have been together and have fought for the survival of this relationship. I will always be there for you. I love you

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  • 2 weeks later...

I thought a while ago why am I doing this. I'm going in blind and have no certainty. The fire is almost out and yet I still did it. No certainty if this would have a positive outcome. I don't know. All I know is I want to know this quiet, mysterious, very magnetic girl. I want to know that it almost makes me resent her. hahahaha

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