TotalGravity

C,

As I am struck by the limitations of time, I feel an agonising tug in my heart and I wonder if I should press on once we are miles apart.

Your words, your actions, and those in between that can't be said nor shown, makes me want to believe that there is a sanctuary to go to.

We wretches live in hope, and you make me want to keep on hoping.

TG

I shall not speak of my sadness at the prospect of your leaving. You already know how it will break my heart to see you go. You also know I shall support your every endeavor. Even from 8,400 miles away.

You will not see nor hear of the tears. Nor the slowing down of the beat of my heart. Nor the heavy sighs that will struggle from my chest.

You shall not hear of my secret dreams and hopes. I do not wish to hold you back in pursuing yours.

What you will know is that if I had my way, I will remain yours, distance notwithstanding. But there is such a thing as free will.

I will not stand in the way of fate if I will be standing on my own, for that will mean you have ceased to fight and have moved on to the next battle. It will be futile then, for me, to keep on.

TG

As for you, buddy, think it over. You know exactly what you want. Think EXACT. Can't get any more perfect than that. Why let a good thing pass?

TG

There are some moments when not succumbing to the bid of logic is bliss. I am aiming for that. Thus, the irrelevance of some geniune sparks. Still strategically placed, don't you think?

Let it be as spontaneous as the dews on silky blades of grass during dawn. One day we'll see where it will all lead. You may think time is running out, but I've got you covered. Everything will fall in its proper place. Like pieces of jigsaw puzzles, we'll find our places. Trust me.

I hope you appreciate the beauty of it all.

TG

It's not the eyes. Its the personality. More so, its the character that seeps out with every thought that is allowed. I will not apologize for not liking you.

TG

YA,

Unlike you, I am my own person. I don't suddenly acquire other people's ways, and words, and be like them. I don't need them to be who I am. I hear you talk and I hear somebody else. Pathetic.

But then, can more be expected of you? I guess that is your saving grace, you and your lot. That you are several notches below.

TG

T,

You should be happy that I am not a pushover or else, what will that make you?

TG

INVICTUS

William Ernest Henley (1849–1903)

Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the Pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever gods may be

For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the Horror of the shade,

And yet the menace of the years

Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll,

I am the master of my fate:

I am the captain of my soul.

Been reciting it since I was 12. Wrote a lot of short stories, poems, and full-length plays based on it during my earlier high school years.

If you forget me

I want you to know

one thing.

You know how this is:

if I look

at the crystal moon, at the red branch

of the slow autumn at my window,

if I touch

near the fire

the impalpable ash

or the wrinkled body of the log,

everything carries me to you,

as if everything that exists,

aromas, light, metals,

were little boats

that sail

toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,

if little by little you stop loving me

I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly

you forget me

do not look for me,

for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,

the wind of banners

that passes through my life,

and you decide

to leave me at the shore

of the heart where I have roots,

remember

that on that day,

at that hour,

I shall lift my arms

and my roots will set off

to seek another land.

But

if each day,

each hour,

you feel that you are destined for me

with implacable sweetness,

if each day a flower

climbs up to your lips to seek me,

ah my love, ah my own,

in me all that fire is repeated,

in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,

my love feeds on your love, beloved,

and as long as you live it will be in your arms

without leaving mine.

- Pablo Neruda

We broke up because there's no sense in continuing something that is already destroying us both.

To Josephine,

I love you no longer; on the contrary, I detest you. you are a wretch, truly perverse, truly stupid, a real Cinderella. You never write to me at all, you do not love your husband; you know the pleasure that your letters give him yet you cannot even manage to write him half a dozen lines, dashed off in a moment! What then do you do all day, Madame? What business is so vital that it robs you of the time to write to your faithful lover? What attachment can be stifling and pushing aside the love, the tender and constant love which you promised him? Who can this wonderful new lover be who takes up your every moment, rules your days and prevents you from devoting your attention to your husband?

Beware, Josephine; one fine night the doors will be broken down and there I shall be. In truth, I am worried, my love, to have no news from you; write me a four page letter instantly made up from those delightful words which fill my heart with emotion and joy. I hope to hold you in my arms before long, when I shall lavish upon you a million kisses, burning as the equatorial sun.

- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

To give the best you can, but leave something for yourself.

I go to where Joy abounds, and Peace flows like a stream.

I go where Laughter resounds, and where Love shines like sunbeams.

In the presence of one who turns my mourning into dancing,

lifting my sorrows, with Life and Blessings.

When everything is about to crash, go on Autopilot.

Kneel, or lay prostrate.

Open my heart and surrender my soul.

Cling on the cross and never let go.

It is when I am weakest, that He is strongest.

Lesson recently learned:

To not lose sight of the gold whilst deep in mud.

Thank you for the cross, and the empty tomb.

Contemplative. (But then, that is not a feeling, but a state of mind.)

Struggling. (But then that is not a feeling, but a state of soul.)

Ah, confused

I am embarking on this charge in an attempt to achieve tabula raza, hoping that somehow, the out pouring will be purified, and no longer shamefully condemned.

It is my desire to be able to hold my head up, and not cringe under accusations for I will be confident that all I have extracted are that which are real, and thus, which I can be extremely proud of.

So here I go, towards the Soul Mountain. And when asked, yes, I shall say, it is I.

TG