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ako i support how edmund dantes thinks. when i read his post, i never felt that he always wants to be the best. he is objective to what he is talking about. he never "name called" anyone, (correct me if i'm wrong edmund) kasi nga 1st hand experience nya ang ma name call, so most likely he would not do that kasi hate nya yun. He gave them title but not name call at never sya ng antagonize ng mga nagshashare ng experiences sa thread, he would emphatize with the person kasi nga he knows what it feels how to bullied.

 

on the hand r35gtr. how you antagonized edmund and glut. it makes me wonder kung alam mo ba talaga ang feeling ng na bully? ano ba ang psyche ng na bully? kaya nga meron tayo tiantawag na psychological trauma, you cant always blame kung yung nabubully e naging reserved dahil sa experiences nya. ikaw sinasabi mo na si glut excuse nya yung sinisisi nya sa mga nambully sa kanya and yet ikaw ang excuse mo e kasi grade 4 ka lang? hmmm. ang grade 4 marunong na magisip, marunong na nga magcutting classes ang mga grade 4 e, tpos ikaw excuse mo yun? sinasabi mo wag umasa na laging may masusumbungan, e kaya nga nagiging reserved ang iba dahil walang malapitan.

 

lets just share are stories... tpos support natin yung mga nadodown. di ba? that would work better. tingin ko kasi yun yung potential ng thread na ito.

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ako i support how edmund dantes thinks. when i read his post, i never felt that he always wants to be the best. he is objective to what he is talking about. he never "name called" anyone, (correct me if i'm wrong edmund) kasi nga 1st hand experience nya ang ma name call, so most likely he would not do that kasi hate nya yun. He gave them title but not name call at never sya ng antagonize ng mga nagshashare ng experiences sa thread, he would emphatize with the person kasi nga he knows what it feels how to bullied.

 

on the hand r35gtr. how you antagonized edmund and glut. it makes me wonder kung alam mo ba talaga ang feeling ng na bully? ano ba ang psyche ng na bully? kaya nga meron tayo tiantawag na psychological trauma, you cant always blame kung yung nabubully e naging reserved dahil sa experiences nya. ikaw sinasabi mo na si glut excuse nya yung sinisisi nya sa mga nambully sa kanya and yet ikaw ang excuse mo e kasi grade 4 ka lang? hmmm. ang grade 4 marunong na magisip, marunong na nga magcutting classes ang mga grade 4 e, tpos ikaw excuse mo yun? sinasabi mo wag umasa na laging may masusumbungan, e kaya nga nagiging reserved ang iba dahil walang malapitan.

 

lets just share are stories... tpos support natin yung mga nadodown. di ba? that would work better. tingin ko kasi yun yung potential ng thread na ito.

 

Hehehe, inaamin ko naman na hindi ako perpektong tao. I have offended people in my life, but I do not think I am a bully. And yes, I do not remember verbally bullying anyone in my life, much more name-call someone. Siguro the closest thing I did to that was address a person with his funny nickname which he gave himself because he was tall and scrawny (worm).

 

r35gtr. Ok andun na kami, bata ka pa nun. Grade 4 ka pa lang. Sige for the sake of the argument nga. Pero if you still look back at that experience thinking tama yung ginawa mo, then it means you have not really matured from it. If you think people deserved to be called ugly just because they have bad genes or are not into the fitness lifestyle, then that makes you a bully to tell you frankly. Remember hindi lahat kagaya mo na habang tumatanda gumagandang lalake at maraming oras pagtuunan ng pansin pagpapagwapo. Tandaan mo iba iba priorities natin sa buhay. Iba iba ng goals, at iba iba din ang kahulugan ng success.

 

I agree we all should learn to properly stand up for ourselves and be strong on our own. I advocated emotional independence. But the reality is, hindi naman lahat ng problema sa mundo kaya mo lutasin magisa. And there is nothing wrong with reporting incidents to teachers cuz in the first place trabaho naman nila magturo ng mabuting asal at ipagtanggol bata na naagrabyado. Tayong matatanda pag naagrabyado, hindi ba pumupunta tayo sa pulis o kaya sa abugado kasi nga, hindi lahat ng conflicts sa buhay na ito kaya mo resolbahin magisa. And just because you asked for a little help, it does not mean you are not standing up. Not standing up is being silent. And what is wrong with solving your problems without having the need to pull a prank on someone else and be a jerk?

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Actually isang tao lang na pwede mo masandalan, makes a big diffenrence.

 

Ako here is one simple trick that works. Nung 4th year hangang college hangang ngayon ito ginagawa ko.

 

Be confident lagi. Huwag mo papakita sa body language mo na nasisindak o takot ka. But don't be overbearing naman to the point nagiging provocative ka na. Firm handshake lagi. Tignan mo kausap mo sa mukha pero huwag magfocus sa mata. Shoulders back and don't stoop down.

 

Bullys prey on people with low self-esteem. Many of them really just wanna enjoy the feeling that they can intimidate someone, kaya huwag ka papasindak. Pag nagawa mo yan, you half won already

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Ako here is one simple trick that works. Nung 4th year hangang college hangang ngayon ito ginagawa ko.

 

Be confident lagi. Huwag mo papakita sa body language mo na nasisindak o takot ka. But don't be overbearing naman to the point nagiging provocative ka na. Firm handshake lagi. Tignan mo kausap mo sa mukha pero huwag magfocus sa mata. Shoulders back and don't stoop down.

 

Bullys prey on people with low self-esteem. Many of them really just wanna enjoy the feeling that they can intimidate someone, kaya huwag ka papasindak. Pag nagawa mo yan, you half won already

i learned this too when i was in college. its how you speak to a group of people. ginagawa ko pagmay reporting and i still use it when reporting sa work. pero pwede mo sya apply individually. stern voice, not intimidating or nagyayabang. basta mapapakita mo lang na confident kaand you know what your saying. wag slouching yung tayo. sa akin maintain eye contact. pero wag naman titig na titig and non-provoking. baka naman kasi naka tingin ka sa mata tapos naka salubong kilay mo, e baka away kalabasan nyan. and always smile, hindi ngiting aso, natural smile. baka kasi isipin nila e nakakaloko ka.

 

totoo, pagnagawa mo yan you almost won na.

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i learned this too when i was in college. its how you speak to a group of people. ginagawa ko pagmay reporting and i still use it when reporting sa work. pero pwede mo sya apply individually. stern voice, not intimidating or nagyayabang. basta mapapakita mo lang na confident kaand you know what your saying. wag slouching yung tayo. sa akin maintain eye contact. pero wag naman titig na titig and non-provoking. baka naman kasi naka tingin ka sa mata tapos naka salubong kilay mo, e baka away kalabasan nyan. and always smile, hindi ngiting aso, natural smile. baka kasi isipin nila e nakakaloko ka.

 

totoo, pagnagawa mo yan you almost won na.

 

Kung me isang sinabi yun isa na agree ako hindi nawawala ang mga bullies pag laki natin. Dito sa current lab ko, medyo bully yung isang postdoc. Palibhasa foreign ako so syempre mainit mata sakin. Inaantay niya ako pumalpak. Pag nagpre-present ng data, di pa ako tapos ng sinasabi ko, binabara na agad ako. GUsto ako hiyain. Minsan nagtataas na nga ng boses at galit na tono.

 

Strategy ko sa kanya, huwag papasindak. Maintain confidence kahit nga mali ka. Kasi lahat naman nagkakamali. Sa trabahong ito you fail more than you succeeed. Pag kinakausap ko sya tinitignan ko sa mukha pero iniiwasan ko na eye to eye kami. Concentrate talaga lagi ako sa exchanges namin. Mapaliwanag ko data ko ng maayos, ng hindi pinapakita na pikon o takot ako sa kanya. Minsan nginignitian ko pa nga kahit sya na itong gusto na ako pagalitan.

 

And so far, hindi naman nakakaapekto sakin pangungulit nya lately. Besides I survived bullies worst that him when I was young so balewala ito.

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When I was still a student, I secretly loved bullies. I trained boxing at an early age and was told to use it only to protect myself or the people around me.

 

With bullies I have a chance to whoop someone's ass. Dito ka matututo sa bullies, pano i handle ang mga kupal sa buhay.

 

 

But to me, wag mo lang gatungan yung pagbubully ng iba. Avoid them, but if need be talk to them with dignity and respect them still, talk to them man to man.

And when they challenge you, k*ll them with your kindness, tell them you win I give up. Magmumukha lang silang tanga at kataawa tawa.

 

Pero when they invade your personal space and they're about to attack you physically.

 

 

Whoop they ass!

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  • 2 weeks later...

ako i support how edmund dantes thinks. when i read his post, i never felt that he always wants to be the best. he is objective to what he is talking about. he never "name called" anyone, (correct me if i'm wrong edmund) kasi nga 1st hand experience nya ang ma name call, so most likely he would not do that kasi hate nya yun. He gave them title but not name call at never sya ng antagonize ng mga nagshashare ng experiences sa thread, he would emphatize with the person kasi nga he knows what it feels how to bullied.

 

on the hand r35gtr. how you antagonized edmund and glut. it makes me wonder kung alam mo ba talaga ang feeling ng na bully? ano ba ang psyche ng na bully? kaya nga meron tayo tiantawag na psychological trauma, you cant always blame kung yung nabubully e naging reserved dahil sa experiences nya. ikaw sinasabi mo na si glut excuse nya yung sinisisi nya sa mga nambully sa kanya and yet ikaw ang excuse mo e kasi grade 4 ka lang? hmmm. ang grade 4 marunong na magisip, marunong na nga magcutting classes ang mga grade 4 e, tpos ikaw excuse mo yun? sinasabi mo wag umasa na laging may masusumbungan, e kaya nga nagiging reserved ang iba dahil walang malapitan.

 

lets just share are stories... tpos support natin yung mga nadodown. di ba? that would work better. tingin ko kasi yun yung potential ng thread na ito.

 

 

hello Edmund and Flirtpool. I guess we will never see eye to eye sa bullies because we have different experiences. pero eto tanong ko, ever wondered why yung mga Magaganda at guwapo iisa ang barkada? ever wondered why ang mga mayayaman iisa din silang barkada? Don't you think nabubully din kami? we are stereo typed and minsan may masaya ang kuwentuhan sabay pag dating ko tatahimik sila?

 

On the other side of the spectrum pag may galit sa amin, di naman naming alam kung bakit. I remember nung college, pag nagdala ako ng magandang kotse "Mayabang" na daw ako , then pag balik ko may gasgas pa.

 

Pag meron ako babaeng di pinansin , ang suplado ko daw? ang feeling ko daw. First creepy talaga ang makatanggap ng liham na may pabango sa bag mo na walang pangalan. habang naglalakad ako nag amoy pabango akala ko may multo yun pala may nag iwan na ng letter sa bag ko. pag punta mo sa upuan mo may brownies. siyempre di ko kakainin paano kung ang nagbake nung naglagay ng bulbol niya? tapos ng iniwan ko ang brownies ang kapal ko daw, suplado, cono , etc. etc.

 

how many times ko narinig na . si ""r35gtr...wala iyan.. anak kasi ni... kaya andito sa school natin, otherwise di iyan makakapasa dito" sabi ng mga kaklase kong pangit na mukhang bulldog pero funny thing is, never ko naman siya nakausap.

 

OR kung may gf ka ang sasabihin " Pera lang ang habol ni girl diyan eh. tiniis na ang masama niyang ugali"

 

 

so ano ginawi ko, ininggit ko sila lalo, that is how I fought my bullies in college. I even bought my dad's car para maasar sila lalo.

 

bullying is a two way street kasi. if some bully's get satisfaction by intimidating other people physically, there are some less fortunate individuals who 's only taste of success is getting a bite out of those fortunate people na wala namang ginagawang masama sa kanila.

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hello Edmund and Flirtpool. I guess we will never see eye to eye sa bullies because we have different experiences. pero eto tanong ko, ever wondered why yung mga Magaganda at guwapo iisa ang barkada? ever wondered why ang mga mayayaman iisa din silang barkada? Don't you think nabubully din kami? we are stereo typed and minsan may masaya ang kuwentuhan sabay pag dating ko tatahimik sila?

 

On the other side of the spectrum pag may galit sa amin, di naman naming alam kung bakit. I remember nung college, pag nagdala ako ng magandang kotse "Mayabang" na daw ako , then pag balik ko may gasgas pa.

 

Pag meron ako babaeng di pinansin , ang suplado ko daw? ang feeling ko daw. First creepy talaga ang makatanggap ng liham na may pabango sa bag mo na walang pangalan. habang naglalakad ako nag amoy pabango akala ko may multo yun pala may nag iwan na ng letter sa bag ko. pag punta mo sa upuan mo may brownies. siyempre di ko kakainin paano kung ang nagbake nung naglagay ng bulbol niya? tapos ng iniwan ko ang brownies ang kapal ko daw, suplado, cono , etc. etc.

 

how many times ko narinig na . si ""r35gtr...wala iyan.. anak kasi ni... kaya andito sa school natin, otherwise di iyan makakapasa dito" sabi ng mga kaklase kong pangit na mukhang bulldog pero funny thing is, never ko naman siya nakausap.

 

OR kung may gf ka ang sasabihin " Pera lang ang habol ni girl diyan eh. tiniis na ang masama niyang ugali"

 

 

so ano ginawi ko, ininggit ko sila lalo, that is how I fought my bullies in college. I even bought my dad's car para maasar sila lalo.

 

bullying is a two way street kasi. if some bully's get satisfaction by intimidating other people physically, there are some less fortunate individuals who 's only taste of success is getting a bite out of those fortunate people na wala namang ginagawang masama sa kanila.

 

 

Hmmmm I don't know where you went to school, pero ako yan ang kinatuwa ko nung college na ako is that sa Diliman pantay lang ang mayayaman at mahihirap. I had friends na 3 pa mercedez benz. Some did part time modeling. Me anak ng mayamang aktibista kaya me personal security. At syempre me mga galing sa uring mangagawa. But that was just the culture in the campus. Lahat kami pantay pantay lang. Naalala ko nga yung thesis advisee tandem ko kasi polar opposite sila one was a tall big dude who was prematurely balding and galing sa isang simpleng blue collar na pamilya. His partner was a smaller dude na gwapo at galing sa mayamang pamilya. But they got along just fine and they are 2 of the best that I handled. I guess the point I am trying to make here is that we all could really get along, all it takes lang naman is tamang pagpapakumbaba at pakikisama.

 

One thing bullies have in common is insecurity. Sabi nga, mga duwag ang mga ito sa totoo lang. If that is the kind of bullying you got, then maswerte ka pa! At least di ka naman hinaharass. At least di ba nakakapasok ka pa. Pero if I may say so, your behavior shows that you too are insecure hence you act like a bully yourself. Despite of being good looking and rich, naapektohan ka din so you bully them back. Which is well.... juvenille sa totoo lang.

 

Ako I always say na the most elemental approach to avoid bullies is be confident. You dont have to be perfect but at least be confident. Stand up straight, shoulders back, look a person in the face when you talk to them.

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Well I get picked on talaga nuon, dami parinig sa mga tao. Hard not to be insecure if you here bad stuff about you from people you never even met. imagine people saying na

 

"Ang yabang nito" pero wala ka ginagawa, I just showed up.

 

"Feelingero yun... puro hangin naman laman ng utak"-san nanggaling iyon

 

"Kaya iyan may gf naka Porsche kasi (way back in 1998 lumabas ang boxster ditto sa Pinas)" then pag balik ko sa car park may gasgas.

 

then may chismis pa na " Kaya yan pumasa dinate si mam". then kakalat pa sa school. tumawa na lang ang Professor ko. Perhaps this is the reason why I reacted dun sa kaklase mo na maganda na nilabel mo na bully. Naka relate kasi ako. Pero if she does make other people feel that they are ugly, then masama ugali niya.

 

There are other types of bullying ika nga, not just yung physical na pananakot.

 

now that I am working, may corporate bullying din. Pati sa munisipyo. BIR, Immigration, may mga bully din.

 

kaya as early as now learn how to stand up against bullies.

 

Ang bullies lang na di ko pinapatulan ay yung nasa kalye na may road rage, baka kasi may baril.

 

BTT: pag bukas ko ng diyaryo nung sunday, nakita ko ang advertisement ng iba't ibang school (they call it up to k12 na now). Pinagmamalaki nila na " bully free campus" sila. I guess bullying is considered serious now.

 

back in the day ( 1987-1997), bullying is accepted . Dati nagsumbong ako sa tatay ko na may nangbubully sa akin, ang solusyon niya isama ko kuya ko at bugbugin daw namin. now it seems that people try to talk things out which is good.

 

Pero ang bullying, I do not think totally mawawala . Ex, Sa sports, baka mamya pag di pinili ang mababagal na players dahil mataba sila , tawagin na pangbubully na or ang pandak ayaw ipa volley ball kasi pandak.

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Well I get picked on talaga nuon, dami parinig sa mga tao. Hard not to be insecure if you here bad stuff about you from people you never even met. imagine people saying na

 

"Ang yabang nito" pero wala ka ginagawa, I just showed up.

 

"Feelingero yun... puro hangin naman laman ng utak"-san nanggaling iyon

 

"Kaya iyan may gf naka Porsche kasi (way back in 1998 lumabas ang boxster ditto sa Pinas)" then pag balik ko sa car park may gasgas.

 

then may chismis pa na " Kaya yan pumasa dinate si mam". then kakalat pa sa school. tumawa na lang ang Professor ko. Perhaps this is the reason why I reacted dun sa kaklase mo na maganda na nilabel mo na bully. Naka relate kasi ako. Pero if she does make other people feel that they are ugly, then masama ugali niya.

 

There are other types of bullying ika nga, not just yung physical na pananakot.

 

now that I am working, may corporate bullying din. Pati sa munisipyo. BIR, Immigration, may mga bully din.

 

kaya as early as now learn how to stand up against bullies.

 

Ang bullies lang na di ko pinapatulan ay yung nasa kalye na may road rage, baka kasi may baril.

 

BTT: pag bukas ko ng diyaryo nung sunday, nakita ko ang advertisement ng iba't ibang school (they call it up to k12 na now). Pinagmamalaki nila na " bully free campus" sila. I guess bullying is considered serious now.

 

back in the day ( 1987-1997), bullying is accepted . Dati nagsumbong ako sa tatay ko na may nangbubully sa akin, ang solusyon niya isama ko kuya ko at bugbugin daw namin. now it seems that people try to talk things out which is good.

 

Pero ang bullying, I do not think totally mawawala . Ex, Sa sports, baka mamya pag di pinili ang mababagal na players dahil mataba sila , tawagin na pangbubully na or ang pandak ayaw ipa volley ball kasi pandak.

 

I am not sure if all these falls under the category of bullying. Because as I see it, you are not really being coerced and you are not really being harassed. In this lifetime as you prosper more people will hate you, but that is not always "bullying" technically. Nangyayari din naman sakin yung sinasabihan na mayabang dahil lang daw napagaral ako sa ibang bansa, as if di ko pinaghirapan itong opportunity na ito at ninakawan ko sila. But nonetheless, I am also aware that these people are insecure cowards who can't do much really but talk s@%t behind my back. I mean its not like they have the power to do some real harassment na maapektuhan nila reputation ko sa totoong mundo. So these are really the kind of people that Id rather not waste my energy and thoughts for. Besides I am a very busy person. I am so busy I work in my sleep lol. Now kung ginagasgas na sports car mo, then the best thing you can really do complain to the police. O kaya magdemanda ka.

 

I guess what I am trying to say in all these is that, you do not need to be a douchebag to handle douchebags. You do not need to lower yourself. You can choose to act with a little bit of poise. Sabi ko nga, one thing bullies have in common is that they are insecure people. And when you do not handle your own insecurity well, you become a bully yourself = the same douchebags that you hate. Worst you only indulge them to keep doing that to you, so there is escalation.

 

You are right, the world will never run out of bullies as much as it would run out of criminals. But you do not have to be a criminal to deal with criminals. And indeed there are many kinds of bullies. There are those you can afford to not waste energy on. And there are those you need to confront. Like my fellow postdoc sa lab. Talagang lagi ako gusto hanapan ng mali. Ang angas din magtanong. Hindi pa ako tapos magsalita binabara na ako agad. Kung tao lang ako na walang pinagaralan nasapak ko na ito malamang.... but no! Each time we discuss, shoulders back, chin up and tignan sa mukha yun kausap. I stand my ground and I concentrate, lalo kung alam kong tama sinasabi ko. He can keep finding the loopholes he wants, but I know what I am talking about. And even if he does indeed find something, then ok admit I cant win them all. But still di ako papaapekto. Then kinalaunan ayun, he had no choice really but respect me though he does not like me that much

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  • 4 months later...
  • 2 months later...

Elementary when I was bullied by a teacher. Bumagsak sa isang quiz iyong pet niya tapos nag side comment ako. Pintayo ako sa harap ng class at inubos ang oras para sa mapahiya ako. Dahil sa insidenteng iyan nawalan ako ng respeto sa mga teachers ng school. At handa na akong makipag basagan ng mukha sa magsusubok na mam bully sa akin. Last year ng hs ko lang na realize na may violent streak pala ako. lagi akong umuuwi na punit ang damit o kaya may sugat sa kung saan. Wala na pala akonh iniba sa mga bully. That was bad.

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It's so simple. Learn to defend yourself. Bullies will only go after you if they know they will win, or in other words, they think you are easy prey. If he thinks pwede siya matalo, he won't risk getting embarrassed. He will likely leave you alone or even invite you to join his group.

 

That's what happened to me when I was still in school. I had a big classmate who bullied me. At first I ignored it, hoping it would go away, I didn't want any trouble in school. Of course it didn't work. He just kept coming and coming, because he thought I was easy. When I finally realized that, I agreed to fight. I ended up breaking his nose and I nearly got expelled by the school. But after that, he respected me and we became friends. We even became best friends.

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eto naman naranasan kong pangbubully sa ibang bansa. Racial Profiling.

 

Asian look kasi ako . Nung nag aral ako sa ibang bansa, 6 kaming asiano sa Room. yung apat mukhang pat pat yung isa babaeng mataba tsaka ako. May "Mathlete" contest sa school nuon ng biglaan nakita ko na ako ang pambato ng Class. Nilista ako ng Class Rep na Egoy. Sabi ko " hey why did you list me in the quadratic equation and parabola contest"' ang sagot niya " you are an Asian dude, you know math like you know pingpong" . Kasama ko sa Math team ang koreanang mataba.

 

Giannap ang contest sa Student hall and nice to say nanalo naman kami. Inasume na dahil asiano ako magaling ako sa Math!!

 

Nakalusot at nakasagot naman ako sa tanong ng contest.

pagkatapos ng ilang buwan may palaro naman ang school!!

 

 

Biglaan nagkaroon ng Inter collegiate games. Hindi ko alam nilista nila ako sa sports na Pingpong!! hindi ako marunong mag laro nuon. Nagulat na lang ako ng sinabi ng mga tsiks kong class mate "' We will cheer for you in the games" ako naman " Sure thing baby" di ko alam kung anong games games iyon. biglaan pagtingin ko sa campus announcement board sa may Law Bldg. r35gtr : College representative Table Tennis.

 

Napalunok ako, gaganapin sa Sports complex!!! di ako marunong magtable tennis!!!!

 

lahat ng mga kaklase ko sinisigaw ang pangalan ko , gusto kong mamatay!! tinanong ko sino ba naglista ng pangalan ko sagot sakin " Stacy wrote your name man, your an Asian dude, you guys know pingpong like you know math" Si Stacy ang crush ko nung nag mamasters ako, mabait siya and hindi madamot sa marijuana.

 

ayan na ang collegiate games, nasa harapan ako ng mga 500 katao. ako representative sa pingpong.... talo ako... gusto ko isumpa ang mga nag racial profiling sa akin ;(

 

Langya!

 

Laughtrip to bro! Haha! Grabe napatawa ako lalo na dun sa "Asian dude" remarks and assumptions. HAHAHAHA!

 

OT:

 

I only have 1 experience of bullying which happened during Elementary days. I was the new student on the block and of course my new school had a lot of assh*les. 1st day of school, a big dude tripped me and I fell over the classroom aisle feeling embarrassed. As soon as our class adviser leaves the classroom, I unleashed a flurry of punches on his face until my classmates restrained me. The poor guy's face is all swollen and I was sent to the guidance councilor's office on the 1st day. He never knew that I've been to a couple of schools before being transferred to our school because of my short temper.

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Sometimes changing the way you carry yourself can help you deal with bullies. Bullies will prey on those na alam nilang hindi papalag. Pero kung unang tingin pa lang mukhang papalag ka na, kahit pa sabihin patpatin ka, magdadalawang isip yan kahit papano. Kasi masasaktan mo din naman sya kung sakali.

 

Straight posture, shoulders back, at diretso tingin sa mukha. But of course do not act as if hahamunin mo ng away. Just show na hindi ka takot, it can make the difference.

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The worst bullying I've experienced was when I was a freshie back in college.

 

Me and my friends liked hanging out by the garden near the pharmacy bldg. One of my friends admittedly was quite big but she is one of the most beautiful people I've met.

 

The first instance, some girls from a senior batch started pointing at us. Freshies, easy targets. We were minding our own business eating our food when somebody said out loud, "tignan mo kumain o, parang mga di pinapakain sa bahay nila." Another bitch replied while pointing at me and my friend, "parang magina o, yung isa inahin, yung isa biik." At that point, my ears were starting to heat up. Again, we stayed quiet and finished our food, left.

 

2nd instance, same group, this time with their guy friends, "ayan na naman sila!" Another bitch, "Bakit kaya nagkalat mga pangit dito." A different bitch, "Hindi lang pangit, tignan mo magdamit, ang baduy!" It was our wash day that time. One of the guys actually told them off and approached us with a smile, said sorry and left. We left shortly after him.

 

Last instance, we were walking along the corridor when the same group walked past us. "s@%t! Bakit ang pangit MO talaga!" And this was to my face.

 

I was holding my t-square that time. I just looked at her and looked at where they were going. Great! They were going inside the loo on the ground floor. My friends knew that I was royally pissed from the start and they also knew it was the last straw. I went inside the loo after them. When I saw the queen bee, I approached her when she was going out of the cubicle. I stood at the door and didn't let her pass. Her friends were there, but I guess they were shocked at what I did next. "Ano ba problema mo? Kung makapagsalita ka akala mo napakaganda mo. Tumingin ka nga sa salamin, tignan mo nga kung maganda ka. Pag hindi mo tinigil yang bibig mo, babakiin ko sa'yo itong t-square ko. From 36 inches gagawin kong 6 inches to sayo tsaka sa mga kaibigan mo."

 

They turned pale, the color of the tiles of the bathroom. Next thing I did, using my pointy finger, I tapped her forhead several times, "Isaksak mo jan sa kokote mo na hindi lahat ng freshmen eh kakayankayanin niyo ha."

 

I left her slumped on the cubicle floor because my friends were already yanking my arm. Asking me to leave. I swear, I didn't notice them doing it earlier. I had tunnel vision, I really wanted to break the t-square on the bitch's face.

 

After that incident, we were able to freely hang out in the garden, no more bitchy comments. And one more thing, the boys that they were with actually made friends with us. They even hung around with us when ever our breaks met.

 

Moral of the story: Sometimes you have got to fight back to stop thoae effing bullies from bothering you.

Edited by DarkEinjel
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  • 4 months later...

Bullying does not end in campus. It can happen also when you start working. I have met a couple in my profession. In fact, it got a lot worst when I moved here. Being away from your country, with no real friends, and no one to sympathize with you, you are really just fish out of water. And people are territorial. When you are foreign you stick out like a sore thumb, and that is like giving fresh meat to rabid dogs.

 

See the thing about my situation dito lalo nung bago pa ako, mahirap talaga lumaban. Syempre bago ka ikaw yun kelangan magadjust. Yun isa kong kasama na spoiled brat hindi talaga natagalan, at nagdownward spiral sya.

 

Iba na ang setting kasi pag work na at hindi na school. Lalo pa pag nasa ibang bansa ka. OO hindi ka dapat paalipin na lang, kasi mamimihasa yan, pero huwag din sobrang agressibo to the point na icompromise mo naman sarili mong career.

 

Unang una, pag sa work, be objective. Kahit pinepersonal ka na, huwag na huwag ka mapipikon. The angry mind is a narrow mind. Pag pikon ka, iisipin mo lang gusto mo gawin sa tao. Di mo iisipin kung ano mangyayari pag nagawa mo na. Dapat focus ka sa kausap mo. Kalmado boses, huwag agresibo, diretso tingin, at straight posture. DO NOT BE INTIMIDATED. Pag binabara ka, politely ask the person to let you finish. Pag ikaw naman yun mali, aminin and just learn from it. Huwag na maghinanakit. Pag ikaw naman yun tama, ipaglaban ng hindi nagtataas ng boses. Bottomline, huwag papadal sa emosyon. Concentrate dapat.

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I have a couple of stories to tell about bullying.

 

Nung bata kasi ako, payat na payat ako at sakitin pa talaga. Plus it didn't help that I come from a mixed heritage. I pretty much stuck out like a sore-thumb, and usually guys like me are red meat to the dogs. The dogs I am referring to are these really big dudes who can always use their size to impose on you anything.

 

Ang masama noon, the school didn't take the issue of bullying seriously. Parang wala lang sa kanila. Hindi noon naiintindihan ng eskwelahan natin na serious problem sya sa mga estudyante. Kasi papano ka gaganahan pumasok sa eskwela at magaral kung binubugbug ka lagi, o kaya naman tinutukso ka. Sakin nga mas ok na yung batukbatukan ka. At least yun saglit lang wala na sakit. Pero kung name-calling ginagawa lalo pa at araw araw, nakakadurog talaga yun ng self-esteem. Minsan ayaw mo na pumasok, ayaw mo na magaral.

 

In my teenage years, lahat na ata ng klase ng bully naranasan ko na. Hindi nga lang lalake ang laging bully. Minsan babae din lol. Anyway lets discuss dito

Quite dated na pero may narinig lang ako na parang similar case, there’s the red meat and there’s the dogs. When the counselor dug deeper. Yung dogs pla red meat din ng iba. Because of his size, the big boy was called names such as kapre, bonjing and oso. Di cya makaget-even sa bully niya so turned to those he can. Old story too, dial up days.

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