Need some inputs on a problem

[bill_262003]

You seem to be too worried with your age. And if you are, it will show and the girl can see it. Age can both be a negative and positive thing.

 

For the negative thing, you can't do anything about it so just move on. The negatives would, of course be your body (your body is older like it or not and there would be some wrinkles already that you can't hide).

 

Instead of dwelling on the negatives, you should highlight the positives. What are the positives of your age?

 

Experience.

You already have more experience with women (and with that I don't only mean sex but with treating them). Use your experience to your advantage. And what does your experience say. For starters, don't just text, instead you should call! You said she didn't like it? Maybe, you were calling at the wrong time. Ask her what is the best time to call her.

 

Confidence

You seem to be lacking this one. But you need confidence. Women like confident men. And more often than not, this comes with age. The older you get the more confident you become.

 

Stability

This would be your number one selling point. You are now stable. You have the money to spend on her. You have your own car. Treat her to a good restaurant. Bring her to places she could't go. Women like stable men even if they are not yet looking for a partner to settle down with, that will always be in their subconscious.

 

 

I think a lot of posters have already stated this. Stop over analyzing. The way I see it, the girl can see that your self-doubt. Thus, she is also beginning to doubt you as well.

[wildswans]

Thanks for all comments and advise. I really appreciate it. To JT Blackknight, I guess you hit the nail on the head!

 

Here's what happened:

 

We went out today at nagsimba since nung Wednesday pa siya nagyaya to go to church. After church, ayaw niyang mag mall kasi lagi na daw kami nagmall at gusto niya magmerienda then uwi na daw coz di daw siya nagpaalam at gusto niya magusap kami. I sensed something's wrong kaya kinulit ko siya konti until nag open up siya regarding what her colleagues said about, bakit di namin napaguusapan kung mga personal matters among ourselves like naka ilan gf na ako at naka ilan bf na siya. It turns out wala pa siya naging bf. She also opened up to me na hindi pa siya ready sa commmitment and is actually afraid of it pa which made thought initially that she's turning me down na. Yun pala she's worried na baka kasal na agad gusto ko so I reassured her that we will still go along the process of nurturing the relationship, if ever, until she's ready or both of us are ready to tie the knot. Naginhawaan siya sa sinabi ko. After that, nagbanggit ako kung ok lang ba ituloy ko panliligaw ko and she blurted out "nanliligaw ka ba?" so I said yes. Then I asked kung pwede ba namin icontinue what we have started and also kung pwede ko siyang ligawan and she said yes. I then muster the guts and ask kung may pagasa ako, she said yes..meron. I didn't ask her about age issues anymore since sinagot na niya na may pag asa ako.

 

She gave me a birthday gift pa nga e - a belated one. What made the gift special was the effort behind it because it consisted of different items like humor cards, 3 kinds of sweet candies, a tshirt with a cute message and a pringle. Aside from those, she put post-it on each item with a sweet message handwritten by her. I really appreciated the gift very much.

 

Sana magtuloy tuloy na ito.

[sonnyt111]

Thanks for all comments and advise. I really appreciate it. To JT Blackknight, I guess you hit the nail on the head!

 

Here's what happened:

 

We went out today at nagsimba since nung Wednesday pa siya nagyaya to go to church. After church, ayaw niyang mag mall kasi lagi na daw kami nagmall at gusto niya magmerienda then uwi na daw coz di daw siya nagpaalam at gusto niya magusap kami. I sensed something's wrong kaya kinulit ko siya konti until nag open up siya regarding what her colleagues said about, bakit di namin napaguusapan kung mga personal matters among ourselves like naka ilan gf na ako at naka ilan bf na siya. It turns out wala pa siya naging bf. She also opened up to me na hindi pa siya ready sa commmitment and is actually afraid of it pa which made thought initially that she's turning me down na. Yun pala she's worried na baka kasal na agad gusto ko so I reassured her that we will still go along the process of nurturing the relationship, if ever, until she's ready or both of us are ready to tie the knot. Naginhawaan siya sa sinabi ko. After that, nagbanggit ako kung ok lang ba ituloy ko panliligaw ko and she blurted out "nanliligaw ka ba?" so I said yes. Then I asked kung pwede ba namin icontinue what we have started and also kung pwede ko siyang ligawan and she said yes. I then muster the guts and ask kung may pagasa ako, she said yes..meron. I didn't ask her about age issues anymore since sinagot na niya na may pag asa ako.

 

She gave me a birthday gift pa nga e - a belated one. What made the gift special was the effort behind it because it consisted of different items like humor cards, 3 kinds of sweet candies, a tshirt with a cute message and a pringle. Aside from those, she put post-it on each item with a sweet message handwritten by her. I really appreciated the gift very much.

 

Sana magtuloy tuloy na ito.

Congratulations are in order. Seems you got what you wished for. Ata boy!! Just continue being nice to her, try to be less formal, be thoughtful, find out what her interests are and try to read up on them so you have something you can talk to her about that she finds interesting. For instance, kung mahilig siya sa tele-novelas, at ikaw naman hinde, baka kailangan magumpisa ka manood ng mga favorite tele novelas niya.

 

Just let her know she can count on you come hell or high water. Good luck sa iyo and hopefully you can make the relationship grow.

 

 

[sonnyt111]

Congratulations are in order. Seems you got what you wished for. Ata boy!! Just continue being nice to her, try to be less formal, be thoughtful, find out what her interests are and try to read up on them so you have something you can talk to her about that she finds interesting. For instance, kung mahilig siya sa tele-novelas, at ikaw naman hinde, baka kailangan magumpisa ka manood ng mga favorite tele novelas niya.

 

Just let her know she can count on you come hell or high water. Good luck sa iyo and hopefully you can make the relationship grow.

 

 

Oh by the way, you may want to try to court the parents too. Be thoughtful and buy them presents on their birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, etc. A little good-will with the parents will go a long way especially if they like you. If some other guy tries to court your girl, your first line of defense will be her parents!! It doesn't get better than that unless of course rebelde yung girlfriend mo.

[fletcherlinderburgh]

Dude, don't get me wrong but aren't you a bit old for this high school feeling I'm in love kinda stuff? I mean, dude, let's face it, you're no psychic to be able to read your person of interest's mind. Chill. You'll get your girl if you get your girl. Ask her out, if she says no then ask another girl out. She's not the only fish in the pond, dude. Younger or older, who cares, if she really likes you then you guys will hit it off. Sometimes your so caled gentlemanly manners of apologizing can scare the bejezus in a woman. Man be yourself. Tell her what you want. Strike the conversation. Stop the high school crap of a bull and be yourself. You can do this man. But if it takes too much of your time wondering whats she's thinking then stop. You're no psychic. Ask her. If the answer is yes then, hell, we'll celebrate with yah, but if the answer is no, well hell, it's just one damn good reason to visit the mp's and espa of MTC. Go for it, man.

[dinibdib]

actually age doesn't matter as long as you dwell together.

[pedron]

Curious - wonder how this eventually turned out.

[gp5]

good am

 

1. drop down your "age+attitude". if shes on her early 20's act like your on your 22's, you have your own car, a stable work, resource capable,

dont get too serious with her, treat her with respect not only because you have fallen inlove with her but because thats how you treat all women alike.

AND ofcourse guys on early 20's dont want to commit on any serious relationship yet like MARRIAGE. but there is a catch... your 36 will end up becoming 36+++. like everybody else...

 

2. You have to understand that by being honest to her have made an impression of you being possesive. specially with your age gap. maybe thats how she feels,

on her side ofcourse she wants to enjoy her youth and thats were you come along, help her enjoy her youth. "It takes 5 dates to make a man fall inlove, while women takes 10." (eh sa 4th date palang tinakot muna hehe peace!)

 

3. It is evident that the opportunity to make her fall inlove with you is already gone but not permanently,

you just have to begin from scratch... 0, ZERO, 1-1=?. look on the bright side you can change your attitude from there, act naturally if not possible read the Laws of Seduction book or sounded like that BWAHAHAHA!!!

 

4. In the end its either you Raise the Flag or Raise the Roof !!! ruuf ruff!! ehem.

 

im out of here, what am i talking about...hehe

 

i agree. Especially on "if shes on her early 20's act like your on your 22's"

Pag pareho kayo ng vibe, sayo na yun. Kaso puro problema iniisip mo kaysa solution.

[dninjamoves1]

Kalma lang, relax n chill.

 

If ur gonna ask me in my own opinion, find a diff girl, dami jan, maganda mabait n yun pahahalagahan yun effort mo.

 

ur d guy, u should be in control, wag kang parang desperado, pag naging kayo nyan bka maging under k pa.

 

just go out, socialize and enjoy. U deserve better.

[extraunleaded]

enjoy her instead of being a chaperon for her...

[dinibdib]

actually age doesn't matter as long as you dwell together.

 

i agree!

[polarz]

sorry but you probably gave her the creeps. maybe ur a bit too emotional?

[Bentong Senior]

para sa akin, hindi hadlang ang laki ng agwat ng edad sa dalawang taong lubos na nagmamahalan.

[daphne loves derby]

Thanks for all comments and advise. I really appreciate it. To JT Blackknight, I guess you hit the nail on the head!

 

Here's what happened:

 

We went out today at nagsimba since nung Wednesday pa siya nagyaya to go to church. After church, ayaw niyang mag mall kasi lagi na daw kami nagmall at gusto niya magmerienda then uwi na daw coz di daw siya nagpaalam at gusto niya magusap kami. I sensed something's wrong kaya kinulit ko siya konti until nag open up siya regarding what her colleagues said about, bakit di namin napaguusapan kung mga personal matters among ourselves like naka ilan gf na ako at naka ilan bf na siya. It turns out wala pa siya naging bf. She also opened up to me na hindi pa siya ready sa commmitment and is actually afraid of it pa which made thought initially that she's turning me down na. Yun pala she's worried na baka kasal na agad gusto ko so I reassured her that we will still go along the process of nurturing the relationship, if ever, until she's ready or both of us are ready to tie the knot. Naginhawaan siya sa sinabi ko. After that, nagbanggit ako kung ok lang ba ituloy ko panliligaw ko and she blurted out "nanliligaw ka ba?" so I said yes. Then I asked kung pwede ba namin icontinue what we have started and also kung pwede ko siyang ligawan and she said yes. I then muster the guts and ask kung may pagasa ako, she said yes..meron. I didn't ask her about age issues anymore since sinagot na niya na may pag asa ako.

 

She gave me a birthday gift pa nga e - a belated one. What made the gift special was the effort behind it because it consisted of different items like humor cards, 3 kinds of sweet candies, a tshirt with a cute message and a pringle. Aside from those, she put post-it on each item with a sweet message handwritten by her. I really appreciated the gift very much.

 

Sana magtuloy tuloy na ito.

 

Good luck sau brad.. Now that you've seen a light at the end of the tunnel, dont rush everything. If you really love her, wait, since ikaw nga ang magiging 1st BF niya and she's young, she wants to enjoy and experience GF/BF relationship not Marriage agad tulad ng sinabi niya. Tip lang, you have to lengthen more your patience dahil mas mahirap amuin or i please ang mga younger lovers, demanding sa attention at sumpungin dahil nga yung maturity level niyo hindi pareho.

 

and one more thing, ngayong nakukuha mo na ang trust niya, make sure na wala ka na talagang tinatago like illegitimate child, ex-wife, etc. Dahil pag nalaman niya to ng hindi mo sinasabi - Boom, bubble pop ka na. Back to reality ika nga.

[ASH ley]

Solusyon ang hanpin sa problema ..

[guytalker]

bro, wag masyadong clingy... parang stalker na kasi dating mo na pati FB nya e mukhang araw araw mong binibisita... tapos pag may di ka nagustuhan sa mga post nya or comment nya or worst sa nagcomment sa kanya e maglulupasay ka sa galit... learn to control yourself and always know where you stand...

 

let your love be the source of your happiness not the beginning of many of your future problems.

[PBB Arsonist]

bro, wag masyadong clingy... parang stalker na kasi dating mo na pati FB nya e mukhang araw araw mong binibisita... tapos pag may di ka nagustuhan sa mga post nya or comment nya or worst sa nagcomment sa kanya e maglulupasay ka sa galit... learn to control yourself and always know where you stand...

 

let your love be the source of your happiness not the beginning of many of your future problems.

 

 

good advice.

[beau01]

I dont know where to put my questions.kaya dito na lang. Kapag nagmessage ako sa guy at seen zone siya ano pwede ko gawin? Wait until he's ready to talk? We had a fight at kasalanan niya. But he's not sorry. Galit ako 1 week na hindi pa rin siya nagpaparamdam. What to do? Tia.

[JPBriones]

I dont know where to put my questions.kaya dito na lang. Kapag nagmessage ako sa guy at seen zone siya ano pwede ko gawin? Wait until he's ready to talk? We had a fight at kasalanan niya. But he's not sorry. Galit ako 1 week na hindi pa rin siya nagpaparamdam. What to do? Tia.

 

sorry to tell you this, pero ibig sabihin wala kang halaga at pakialam sayo... imposible naman na for a week very busy and can't even reply by saying at least the word "wait " or "sorry"...

 

truth really hurts but the only way to lessen the pain is acceptance.

[Solaryan]

agree.. accept mo na di nga worthwhile sa kanya na replyan or magreach out sayo...

[Lev1807]

My damn overthinking

[beau01]

Thanks guys.

[Urameshi Yusuke]

Could someone help me how to deal with in laws na nangingialam sa buhay namin, occupied our home at ngrereyna reynahan sa bahay.

[Msalva]

Could someone help me how to deal with in laws na nangingialam sa buhay namin, occupied our home at ngrereyna reynahan sa bahay.

Ulit, bahay nyo and nakikitira sa inyo? Tama ba? If yes, I think you need to talk to your wife, mahirap kasi kung ikaw makikipag usap sa in laws mo e, lalong magiging magulo, so talk to your wife and tell her what the problem is and then sya ang kumausap sa pamilya nya. Good luck!

[glut_func]

Could someone help me how to deal with in laws na nangingialam sa buhay namin, occupied our home at ngrereyna reynahan sa bahay.

 

Kung kaya nyo bumukod then do that pero kung hindi then no choice kundi makisama. Dealing with in-laws comes with the territory, wala ka magagawa kasi andyan na yan. You have to live with that fact.