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Falling For A Therapist - Merged Thread


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#9021 yezir

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Posted 16 January 2017 - 04:08 PM

"Falling inlove is easy, Having sex is easier, but bumping into someone that can spark your soul is rare."
-Spark.


Love this quote, Mavic.Difficult but possible.This takes deep connection for both parties for it to evolve at this stage. Ibang level na talaga ang relationship pag umabot na dito.
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#9022 BRAIN FOR HIRE

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 12:09 AM

Like Jack Nicholson related in an interview, there's an infatuation cycle of 18 months- that's the "honeymoon" phase so to speak. In relations like these, that part is not always easy as the job entails things the guy might not really be down with in the long run. And then after that that's when you start the "real" relationship, as the novelty fades, you need to choose to be together, you need to choose to see past the flaws and faults that become apparent. A relationship is complicated when there are primarily two people involved, but one with other parties intruding? You may as well just make it about sex (in truth many will succumb to mistaking the sex for intimacy- the feeling of closeness being simulated by the physical acts and seeing the other naked)

 

That's why its easy to get to the edge of closeness, but if you step back for a moment, it makes no sense. Best to treat the relationship like a snack with an expiry date. There's no real substance to be gained unless you really really try, and chances are, its gonna smart like the dickens- the massage parlor types having ATW every day come with a lot of baggage, that's just the way it is. The act is often an act; what you see is not what you get if you pursue. But still I know of at least two instances where being a KISA worked insofar as the girl got out and lived not quite happily ever after, but got out nonetheless.    



#9023 Solaryan

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 12:18 AM

Bakit di nagtagal?It was a mutual decision for us to end it.Ako kasi naging super seloso. Inis ako pag may mga pumoporma sa kanya. Paranoid ako and I always question kung loyal siya sa akin.Yan ang madalas namin pag awayan.Nag adjust naman siya for me pero over time bumabalik siya sa dati niyang ways na sumasama for lunch/dinner with clients sa labas, gimmicks with her friends.Naintindihan ko na ganun ang work niya at ang naging buhay niya before I met her. Ako sa expectations ko sa kanya as a girlfriend at siya naman sa kelangan niyang gawin as part of the job. To be fair, sobrang honest siya sa lahat ng ginagawa niya kasi sinasabi niya sa akin lahat.Siguro ako lang talaga may problema.Love namin isat isa pero pareho kaming nahihirapan dahil sa mga priorities at expectations namin. Kahit open pa ang communication namin sa isat isa. So, In the end hindi namin napanindigan ang love namin.

Ang pinakamasakit is naka move on siya ng mabilis at may nahanap na siyang bago. Siguro may "Spark" na naman siyang nakita with another client.

Kaya di ako masyadong solve sa spark na yan. Pang pelikula lang at kilig.It's so Hollywood culture. Ang totoong honest to goodness relationship is beyond the kilig part.Dun masusubukan ang love ninyo sa isat isa. So goodluck sa mga naka feel ng spark jan with their special someone.Stay with the feeling pero it takes lots of work to make it last.

 

 

salamat sa pagshare bro...

 

oo nga, may ganyan talaga. It just goes to show na thera-gm relationship or any other boy-girl relationship posibleng sa una lang masaya at once reality/ real-life takes effect nag biburst ang bubbles at nauuwi sa hiwalayan..

 

I feel for you bro. Pero, in my book, mejo pinalad ka na rin (pun intended. hehe) kasi you and your ex were able to experience those moments together, di ba?

 

Nakakarelate din ako kay pepejose. araw2 din ako nagchcheck ng mtc dahil sa kanya.. yun na rin way ko para makasagap ng news/update about her... hay.. ako rin sad today. walang nakuhang reply :(


Edited by Solaryan, 17 January 2017 - 12:18 AM.


#9024 Usebyo

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 12:24 AM

salamat sa pagshare bro...
 
oo nga, may ganyan talaga. It just goes to show na thera-gm relationship or any other boy-girl relationship posibleng sa una lang masaya at once reality/ real-life takes effect nag biburst ang bubbles at nauuwi sa hiwalayan..
 
I feel for you bro. Pero, in my book, mejo pinalad ka na rin (pun intended. hehe) kasi you and your ex were able to experience those moments together, di ba?
 
Nakakarelate din ako kay pepejose. araw2 din ako nagchcheck ng mtc dahil sa kanya.. yun na rin way ko para makasagap ng news/update about her... hay.. ako rin sad today. walang nakuhang reply :(


We're members of the asado club. LOL

#9025 NMD

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 12:25 AM

 

 

salamat sa pagshare bro...

 

oo nga, may ganyan talaga. It just goes to show na thera-gm relationship or any other boy-girl relationship posibleng sa una lang masaya at once reality/ real-life takes effect nag biburst ang bubbles at nauuwi sa hiwalayan..

 

I feel for you bro. Pero, in my book, mejo pinalad ka na rin (pun intended. hehe) kasi you and your ex were able to experience those moments together, di ba?

 

Nakakarelate din ako kay pepejose. araw2 din ako nagchcheck ng mtc dahil sa kanya.. yun na rin way ko para makasagap ng news/update about her... hay.. ako rin sad today. walang nakuhang reply :(

Let us move on na siguro. Our beloved theras have lives outside the spa, so do we. In the first place, we were fine before they came.  :rolleyes:



#9026 Solaryan

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 12:27 AM

We're members of the asado club. LOL

 

LOL!

mukhang same boat tayo ah. may bf din ba si thera mo? PM kita bro.. hahaha :D


Let us move on na siguro. Our beloved theras have lives outside the spa, so do we. In the first place, we were fine before they came.  :rolleyes:

 

dude thanks sa advise ah.. :)

 

i am trying naman.. 



#9027 dalisay

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 01:02 AM

I can relate to you, dalisay. Question is kumusta ka na? Do you still go to Espa? Do you still visit her again sa work nya?
Sa work kasi ng theras, ang dami nilang namimeet na guys. And they're are still human who have emotions and libidos. Ako, Sa ganyang situation, nagreretire muna ako sa pagpasok sa mga cubicles.
12 years na akong member ng MTC. I don't give frs, I seldom post, I occasionally lurk, pero now dahil sa spark which happened in October last year, halos araw-araw akong nakalog-in sa MTC. Sometimes I feel happy, sometimes sad. Now I'm sad. Hay buhay.


Salamat Sir Pepejose at naiintindihan mo ang kalagayan ko. Kumusta ako?Eto, medyo recent pa kasi kaya sobrang sakit pa. So anjan yung feelings na napakarami - guilt, anger, frustration, sadness, depression, denial. Because of this i've had sleepless nights, walang focus sa work, stressed at windang... Parang roller coaster ride brad. Pero buhay pa naman.Kailangan yatang daanan ko ito eh...

Alam ko naman na pag na forgive ko na sarili ko at siya,dun ako makaka move on...As to how long? di ko masabi.

Kahit naging mutual ang desisyon namin maghiwalay- wala naman kasing madaling goodbye eh.

Para sa akin hindi madaling mag move on kung makikita ko pa siya, so iiwas na ako. Plus, baka magtagpo pa kami ng recent na ka 'spark' niya at maupakan ko pa yun.

Tigil na rin lahat ng communications ko sa kanya and her friends , isama mo na sa viber, FB, IG and twitter. Out of sight, out of mind, ika nga.

Ang reason ko? To forget, forgive and heal. Tapos na kasi yung love story namin. Hindi din ako magiging fair sa next relationship ko (kung magkakaroon pa) kung hindi pa ako naka move on at hindi pa buo pagkatao ko. Hanapin ko muna sarili ko.

Salamat ulit sa pakikidamay mga brad.

#9028 Solaryan

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 01:04 AM

Salamat Sir Pepejose at naiintindihan mo ang kalagayan ko. Kumusta ako?Eto, medyo recent pa kasi kaya sobrang sakit pa. So anjan yung feelings na napakarami - guilt, anger, frustration, sadness, depression, denial. Because of this i've had sleepless nights, walang focus sa work, stressed at windang... Parang roller coaster ride brad. Pero buhay pa naman.Kailangan yatang daanan ko ito eh...

Alam ko naman na pag na forgive ko na sarili ko at siya,dun ako makaka move on...As to how long? di ko masabi.

Kahit naging mutual ang desisyon namin maghiwalay- wala naman kasing madaling goodbye eh.

Para sa akin hindi madaling mag move on kung makikita ko pa siya, so iiwas na ako. Plus, baka magtagpo pa kami ng recent na ka 'spark' niya at maupakan ko pa yun.

Tigil na rin lahat ng communications ko sa kanya and her friends , isama mo na sa viber, FB, IG and twitter. Out of sight, out of mind, ika nga.

Ang reason ko? To forget, forgive and heal. Tapos na kasi yung love story namin. Hindi din ako magiging fair sa next relationship ko (kung magkakaroon pa) kung hindi pa ako naka move on at hindi pa buo pagkatao ko. Hanapin ko muna sarili ko.

Salamat ulit sa pakikidamay mga brad.

 

 

Ilabas mo lang yan bro. At aliwin mo sarili mo. Unti unti maayos mo rin sarili mo.. :)


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#9029 Lesluthor

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 01:37 AM

I am believer in true love too...but more often than not, this is not the place to find it. 99% of the time it will fail because of the factors surrounding the industry. If you are part of the 1% who succeeded, then I congratulate you, its a very rare occurrence. 



#9030 Solaryan

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 01:46 AM

I am believer in true love too...but more often than not, this is not the place to find it. 99% of the time it will fail because of the factors surrounding the industry. If you are part of the 1% who succeeded, then I congratulate you, its a very rare occurrence. 

 

Agree idol. I can't speak for most people here, but, I can flat out admit I didn't visit a spa to look for love. Worldly desires (a.k.a. libog) is what led me to this. :D

 

I just happened to have met someone who makes my worldly desires, a second reason as to why I want to visit and be with her..  As for the lucky guys who succeeds in a gm-thera relationship, congrats! heheheh 


Edited by Solaryan, 17 January 2017 - 01:47 AM.


#9031 Thugsoulja (retired)

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 08:06 AM

Bakit di nagtagal?It was a mutual decision for us to end it.Ako kasi naging super seloso. Inis ako pag may mga pumoporma sa kanya. Paranoid ako and I always question kung loyal siya sa akin.Yan ang madalas namin pag awayan.Nag adjust naman siya for me pero over time bumabalik siya sa dati niyang ways na sumasama for lunch/dinner with clients sa labas, gimmicks with her friends.Naintindihan ko na ganun ang work niya at ang naging buhay niya before I met her. Ako sa expectations ko sa kanya as a girlfriend at siya naman sa kelangan niyang gawin as part of the job. To be fair, sobrang honest siya sa lahat ng ginagawa niya kasi sinasabi niya sa akin lahat.Siguro ako lang talaga may problema.Love namin isat isa pero pareho kaming nahihirapan dahil sa mga priorities at expectations namin. Kahit open pa ang communication namin sa isat isa. So, In the end hindi namin napanindigan ang love namin.
Ang pinakamasakit is naka move on siya ng mabilis at may nahanap na siyang bago. Siguro may "Spark" na naman siyang nakita with another client.
Kaya di ako masyadong solve sa spark na yan. Pang pelikula lang at kilig.It's so Hollywood culture. Ang totoong honest to goodness relationship is beyond the kilig part.Dun masusubukan ang love ninyo sa isat isa. So goodluck sa mga naka feel ng spark jan with their special someone.Stay with the feeling pero it takes lots of work to make it last.


That's the problem when you let your feelings "love" totally control you and get thru your head you already plan and expect...
Jan pumapasok ang pagiging obsessive sa relation...
The jealousy already control you and you become paranoid...
This applies to every relationship not just with therapist...
But it is much more complicated with a thera...So the next time you fall in love with a therapist again...
Number 1 rule don't put so much expectation in your relationship...Just go with the flow and enjoy the companionship and hope that everything will fall in to place...

#9032 SirGreenMango

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 08:52 AM

I think in the ESpa world, it's a very rare thing to find and build a lasting relationship with a thera especially in a world driven primarily by money. 99% of the time, it would most likely fail unless you two both leave the industry for good. you guys are right, this requires a ton lot of money to get out of, and most of us are not that rich.

 

I only know of one successful case where the customer successfully got his thera, married her and got her out of the industry. This guy has his own business and made sure his wife was happy.

 

It's not impossible for this kind of relationship to last, it's just really rare and needs you to be financially well off. I know it's a cynical/ materialistic point of view but this is reality, right?



#9033 Mister Yozo

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 09:42 AM

Just sharing...para dun sa mga tinamaan ng pana ni kupido...nasugatan...luhaan...and still "surviving!"

 

The Wounded by Love Agreement
September 25, 2007
By Paulo Coelho
 
GENERAL PROVISIONS:
 
A] Considering that it’s absolutely correct the saying that states that “all is fair in love and war”;
 
B] Considering that in war we have the Geneva Convention, adopted in August 22nd of 1864, that determines the fate of the wounded in battlefields whereas there is no agreement that was promulgated until this day that deals with the wounded of love, who are much more populous;
 
 
IT IS HEREBY DECLARED THAT:
 
ART. 1 – All lovers, male or female, are now being notified that love, besides being a blessing, is also something very dangerous, unpredictable and able to cause serious damages. Consequently the one who decides to love has to know that his body and soul are exposed to many types of wounds and will not be able to blame the partner in any moment, since the risk is equal to both.
 
ART. 2- Once a lost arrow from the bow of Cupid hits a person, that person has to immediately ask the archer to dart another arrow in the opposite direction, so that one will not fall prey to the wound famously known as “non-reciprocal love”. In case Cupid refuses such act, the Agreement here promulgated demands that the wounded immediately retrieves the arrow from his heart and throw it in the bin.
Note:In order to achieve this effect, the wounded has to avoid phone calls, internet messages, flower deliveries, or any other act of seduction, since these acts may achieve short term results, but are inevitably erased by time. The convention declares that the wounded has to quickly seek the company of other people in order to control the obsessive thought “it’s still worth to fight for this person”.
 
ART. 3 – In case the wound comes from third parties, meaning, the loved one is interested in someone else who was not expected in the pre-established plans, it is hereby expressly forbidden any act of revenge. In this case, it is permitted the profuse use of tears, some punches on the wall or pillow, talks with friends where the wounded can freely insult the ex-partner, allege his complete lack of good-taste, but refraining to lessen the partner’s honor.
NOTE: The agreement determines that art. 2 can also be applied: the wounded may seek the company of other people, preferably in places where the partner does not dwell.
 
ART. 4 – In case of light wounds, hereby classified as small betrayals, fulminating passions that do not last long, transitory sexual disinterest or dysfunction, one has to quickly and abundantly apply a medicine called Forgiveness. Once this medicine applied, one must never look back and the subject must be completely forgotten, never being mentioned as an argument in eventual fights or moments of wrath.
 
ART. 5 – In the case of definitive wounds, also called “brake-ups”, the only medicine capable of truly healing one’s heart is Time. It’s pointless and ineffective to find consolation with fortune-tellers (that will always allege that the lost love will return), romantic books (in which the endings are always happy ones), TV soap operas or other similar things. One has to suffer with intensity, completely avoiding the use of drugs, painkillers, prayers. Alcohol is only allowed in moderation, never surpassing more than two glasses of wine per day.
 
 
 
FINAL PROVISION: the wounded of love, contrary to the wounded of armed conflicts, are neither victims nor torturers. They have chosen something that is part of life and therefore they have to face the agony and the ecstasy of their choice.
And for those that were never wounded by love, they will never be able to say: “I lived”. Because they haven’t.
 
 
(Free Distribution – Copyright by Paulo Coelho)

Edited by Mister Yozo, 17 January 2017 - 09:44 AM.


#9034 Usebyo

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 11:56 AM

Salamat Sir Pepejose at naiintindihan mo ang kalagayan ko. Kumusta ako?Eto, medyo recent pa kasi kaya sobrang sakit pa. So anjan yung feelings na napakarami - guilt, anger, frustration, sadness, depression, denial. Because of this i've had sleepless nights, walang focus sa work, stressed at windang... Parang roller coaster ride brad. Pero buhay pa naman.Kailangan yatang daanan ko ito eh...
Alam ko naman na pag na forgive ko na sarili ko at siya,dun ako makaka move on...As to how long? di ko masabi.
Kahit naging mutual ang desisyon namin maghiwalay- wala naman kasing madaling goodbye eh.
Para sa akin hindi madaling mag move on kung makikita ko pa siya, so iiwas na ako. Plus, baka magtagpo pa kami ng recent na ka 'spark' niya at maupakan ko pa yun.
Tigil na rin lahat ng communications ko sa kanya and her friends , isama mo na sa viber, FB, IG and twitter. Out of sight, out of mind, ika nga.
Ang reason ko? To forget, forgive and heal. Tapos na kasi yung love story namin. Hindi din ako magiging fair sa next relationship ko (kung magkakaroon pa) kung hindi pa ako naka move on at hindi pa buo pagkatao ko. Hanapin ko muna sarili ko.
Salamat ulit sa pakikidamay mga brad.


I wish makakita ka agad ng iba. Just relish the happy moments and learn from the mistakes. Alam mo naman how to love and be loved. Btw can you pm me your thera and spa kung okay lang?

#9035 el ey

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 06:30 PM

isang malaking desisyon, maraming factors.



#9036 dalisay

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Posted 17 January 2017 - 09:55 PM

I wish makakita ka agad ng iba. Just relish the happy moments and learn from the mistakes. Alam mo naman how to love and be loved. Btw can you pm me your thera and spa kung okay lang?


Salamat for your words of encouragement. Sa ngayon di pa ako ready.Hanapin ko muna sarili ko bago niya ako mahanap o matagpuan, kung sino man siya. Hoping the best for you as well, brad.Chin up! Life is good!

#9037 curvermay

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Posted 18 January 2017 - 10:31 AM

I think in the ESpa world, it's a very rare thing to find and build a lasting relationship with a thera especially in a world driven primarily by money. 99% of the time, it would most likely fail unless you two both leave the industry for good. you guys are right, this requires a ton lot of money to get out of, and most of us are not that rich.

 

I only know of one successful case where the customer successfully got his thera, married her and got her out of the industry. This guy has his own business and made sure his wife was happy.

 

It's not impossible for this kind of relationship to last, it's just really rare and needs you to be financially well off. I know it's a cynical/ materialistic point of view but this is reality, right?

 

I have to say I agree sir...this industry is driven by, first money as the primary need of the thera, and flesh as the driving force for GMs...love is indeed possible, but reconciling emotions with reality would really be a big challenge. In my case, I have a goal I need to fulfill and for a GM to woo me and ask me to be in a relationship, even if I do develop feelings for him, my most likely response is a "No". Or at the very least not yet. Making the partnership work while I am in the industry, being intimate with other men, would inadvertently create a strain that might be too much for both of us to bear.  :(  :( :(  


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#9038 SirGreenMango

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Posted 18 January 2017 - 02:23 PM

 

I have to say I agree sir...this industry is driven by, first money as the primary need of the thera, and flesh as the driving force for GMs...love is indeed possible, but reconciling emotions with reality would really be a big challenge. In my case, I have a goal I need to fulfill and for a GM to woo me and ask me to be in a relationship, even if I do develop feelings for him, my most likely response is a "No". Or at the very least not yet. Making the partnership work while I am in the industry, being intimate with other men, would inadvertently create a strain that might be too much for both of us to bear.  :(  :( :(  

 

Coming from a top thera like Ms May, i guess this really is the case with GM-Thera relationships.

 

I guess the best that we can do as GMs is to keep ourselves contented with the current set-up and keep in touch with them, build friendships (for now) and pray to the gods above that somewhere down the road our chance will come when the industry is no longer in the world you both live in.

 

Kumbaga, kapit lang mga pre..  :D for now, Ninja mode muna..  :ninja:



#9039 Turk

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Posted 18 January 2017 - 10:12 PM

I do believe it still exist... And can happen...
So sad not to me...

#9040 Solaryan

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Posted 19 January 2017 - 01:02 AM

 

Just sharing...para dun sa mga tinamaan ng pana ni kupido...nasugatan...luhaan...and still "surviving!"

 

The Wounded by Love Agreement
September 25, 2007
By Paulo Coelho
 
GENERAL PROVISIONS:
 
A] Considering that it’s absolutely correct the saying that states that “all is fair in love and war”;
 
B] Considering that in war we have the Geneva Convention, adopted in August 22nd of 1864, that determines the fate of the wounded in battlefields whereas there is no agreement that was promulgated until this day that deals with the wounded of love, who are much more populous;
 
 
IT IS HEREBY DECLARED THAT:
 
ART. 1 – All lovers, male or female, are now being notified that love, besides being a blessing, is also something very dangerous, unpredictable and able to cause serious damages. Consequently the one who decides to love has to know that his body and soul are exposed to many types of wounds and will not be able to blame the partner in any moment, since the risk is equal to both.
 
ART. 2- Once a lost arrow from the bow of Cupid hits a person, that person has to immediately ask the archer to dart another arrow in the opposite direction, so that one will not fall prey to the wound famously known as “non-reciprocal love”. In case Cupid refuses such act, the Agreement here promulgated demands that the wounded immediately retrieves the arrow from his heart and throw it in the bin.
Note:In order to achieve this effect, the wounded has to avoid phone calls, internet messages, flower deliveries, or any other act of seduction, since these acts may achieve short term results, but are inevitably erased by time. The convention declares that the wounded has to quickly seek the company of other people in order to control the obsessive thought “it’s still worth to fight for this person”.
 
ART. 3 – In case the wound comes from third parties, meaning, the loved one is interested in someone else who was not expected in the pre-established plans, it is hereby expressly forbidden any act of revenge. In this case, it is permitted the profuse use of tears, some punches on the wall or pillow, talks with friends where the wounded can freely insult the ex-partner, allege his complete lack of good-taste, but refraining to lessen the partner’s honor.
NOTE: The agreement determines that art. 2 can also be applied: the wounded may seek the company of other people, preferably in places where the partner does not dwell.
 
ART. 4 – In case of light wounds, hereby classified as small betrayals, fulminating passions that do not last long, transitory sexual disinterest or dysfunction, one has to quickly and abundantly apply a medicine called Forgiveness. Once this medicine applied, one must never look back and the subject must be completely forgotten, never being mentioned as an argument in eventual fights or moments of wrath.
 
ART. 5 – In the case of definitive wounds, also called “brake-ups”, the only medicine capable of truly healing one’s heart is Time. It’s pointless and ineffective to find consolation with fortune-tellers (that will always allege that the lost love will return), romantic books (in which the endings are always happy ones), TV soap operas or other similar things. One has to suffer with intensity, completely avoiding the use of drugs, painkillers, prayers. Alcohol is only allowed in moderation, never surpassing more than two glasses of wine per day.
 
 
 
FINAL PROVISION: the wounded of love, contrary to the wounded of armed conflicts, are neither victims nor torturers. They have chosen something that is part of life and therefore they have to face the agony and the ecstasy of their choice.
And for those that were never wounded by love, they will never be able to say: “I lived”. Because they haven’t.
 
 
(Free Distribution – Copyright by Paulo Coelho)

 

 

 

Ang ganda nito Ginoong Yozo.. :)

 

Lakas ng hugot nun last line ah.. 






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